How do you afford private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A friend pays for private for 2 kids K-12 by not saving for college 😐

I see nothing wrong with this. K-12 is about a thousands times more important to life than which college you attend.

A sharp private educated kid can go to say Towson and still get into medical school. Not to mention a smart private kid is going to have plenty of tier 2 options after scholarships and grants, so landing at a "Towson" is unlikely. Or just take out [bigger] loans for a tier 1 college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Worked hard at good paying jobs, HHI over 2mil. Don’t even feel the cost for 2 kids.


Good career choice and luck.

Please enlighten me on career choices that produce this income? You don't have to tell yours. We're make about 200 k and are on FA but both grew up in very poor families so I have no idea how to even earn this! Would love to be able to discuss these things with my kids. I want them to have a broader outlook on opportunities than I did. (Yes they will do what they love, etc- but its still good to be knowledgeable)

One spouse is probably BigLaw partner. But there are other jobs with comparable incomes in the area.

+1 My spouse is a biglaw partner and makes $1.5-$2.5 million a year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parochial schools are far less expensive and many offer financial aid. Private k-12 is a higher priority for us than college savings. For college- we will encourage state schools.

OP here, is parochial such as catholic school? Are those as good as the top private schools? How do they compare to a good public school?

Parochial schools are religious. Catholic, christian, Jewish. Each school is unique and you have to look at each one separately. Some are very strong academically- some less. They are generally less expensive and offer more aid. However, most families want to be there because of the religious environment.

Doesn't parochial specifically mean tethered to a specific place of worship? Like a church that has a primary school? Very few Catholic high schools are parochial but many seem to incorrectly use the parochial term.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One word -- grandparents

+1

Us as well.

And from what I can tell, at least one third of our school...

Two words: white privilege. The truth is most minority families can’t rely on mommy and daddy’s money to attend private school.

The phrase "white privilege" is growing old already. It doesn't explain everything in life. You really need to target your anger on Bezos, Zuckerberg, Buffet, and Dimon, etc. You're attacking people of roughly the same class as you because they are doing slightly better financially and making different choices than you. Redirect your anger elsewhere.

Yes, my son's mommy and daddy are paying for his LS. He's under 10 y/o - difficult to be self-made at that age. And before you start about my being born w a silver spoon in my mouth - think again. I was a latchkey kid of a single mom who attending junior college while I was in upper ES and MS and finished her BS while I was in HS. She went to law school when I went to college. I watched her bust her arse and tried to work even hard than she did. Took FA loans, the whole bit, and somehow overcame the odds with some luck, some mentoring, and some hard work. So go away with the privilege argument. It's stale.

As my black dad used to say, if you are poor and white, you are either dumb or lazy. Pick one. That’s why your mother came from the background she did. Her parents (your grandparents) are to blame.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One word -- grandparents

+1

Us as well.

And from what I can tell, at least one third of our school...

Two words: white privilege. The truth is most minority families can’t rely on mommy and daddy’s money to attend private school.

The phrase "white privilege" is growing old already. It doesn't explain everything in life. You really need to target your anger on Bezos, Zuckerberg, Buffet, and Dimon, etc. You're attacking people of roughly the same class as you because they are doing slightly better financially and making different choices than you. Redirect your anger elsewhere.

Yes, my son's mommy and daddy are paying for his LS. He's under 10 y/o - difficult to be self-made at that age. And before you start about my being born w a silver spoon in my mouth - think again. I was a latchkey kid of a single mom who attending junior college while I was in upper ES and MS and finished her BS while I was in HS. She went to law school when I went to college. I watched her bust her arse and tried to work even hard than she did. Took FA loans, the whole bit, and somehow overcame the odds with some luck, some mentoring, and some hard work. So go away with the privilege argument. It's stale.

As my black dad used to say, if you are poor and white, you are either dumb or lazy. Pick one. That’s why your mother came from the background she did. Her parents (your grandparents) are to blame.

Your dad was a fool then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We make $110K. I'm a SAHM who does temporary gigs of about $4K - 12K a year. Our 3 kids are in parochial school for about $15K total. We used our $3500 in stimulus bucks this year for part of the tuition.

Otherwise, we never travel by plane. Likely will never go to Disney or Europe. My husband drives my 12 year old car from college. We don't do extracurriculars outside of town rec league. Lots and lots of library books. Craigslist and facebook marketplace for new bikes, furniture, baby supplies.

We don't do financial aid because the amount of disclosure required is really uncomfortable.

We picked a semi rural part of New England to raise the kids. Who needs travel soccer when you can snow blow 4 months out of the year every Saturday morning?

If you don’t mind me asking, what type of side gigs do you do? Sahm here and so demoralized by not being able to contribute to income. I do all the childcare and cooking, cleaning, and yard work but would love to bring in some extra income.

Hope the PP sees this... I did "Rustic barn wedding" catering every weekend from June-Oct one summer. I worked at a call center 6 pm-12 AM one semester. My computer password was "TuitionBux", hah. I got my CNA cert and did 20 hours a week on a hosputal med-surg floor. My prekid life was a business reporter. All these PT gigs required significant support from my husband, who watched our kids when I worked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We make $110K. I'm a SAHM who does temporary gigs of about $4K - 12K a year. Our 3 kids are in parochial school for about $15K total. We used our $3500 in stimulus bucks this year for part of the tuition.

Otherwise, we never travel by plane. Likely will never go to Disney or Europe. My husband drives my 12 year old car from college. We don't do extracurriculars outside of town rec league. Lots and lots of library books. Craigslist and facebook marketplace for new bikes, furniture, baby supplies.

We don't do financial aid because the amount of disclosure required is really uncomfortable.

We picked a semi rural part of New England to raise the kids. Who needs travel soccer when you can snow blow 4 months out of the year every Saturday morning?

If you don’t mind me asking, what type of side gigs do you do? Sahm here and so demoralized by not being able to contribute to income. I do all the childcare and cooking, cleaning, and yard work but would love to bring in some extra income.

Hope the PP sees this... I did "Rustic barn wedding" catering every weekend from June-Oct one summer. I worked at a call center 6 pm-12 AM one semester. My computer password was "TuitionBux", hah. I got my CNA cert and did 20 hours a week on a hosputal med-surg floor. My prekid life was a business reporter. All these PT gigs required significant support from my husband, who watched our kids when I worked.

I bet you will have happy, well-adjusted kids. Seriously

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A friend pays for private for 2 kids K-12 by not saving for college 😐

I see nothing wrong with this. K-12 is about a thousands times more important to life than which college you attend.

A sharp private educated kid can go to say Towson and still get into medical school. Not to mention a smart private kid is going to have plenty of tier 2 options after scholarships and grants, so landing at a "Towson" is unlikely. Or just take out [bigger] loans for a tier 1 college.

NP. And I would just add that the ROI on a bachelor’s degree is dwindling

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One word -- grandparents

+1

Us as well.

And from what I can tell, at least one third of our school...

Two words: white privilege. The truth is most minority families can’t rely on mommy and daddy’s money to attend private school.

Well, it’s a little racist to assume they can’t.

There aren’t tons, but there are enough minority families with second generation wealth (especially in dc) for you to come off a little tone deaf.

+1. The black families at our school are way richer than my white FA kid. I actually consider it kind of a bonus that my kid does not equate melanin with poverty!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One word -- grandparents

+1

Us as well.

And from what I can tell, at least one third of our school...

Two words: white privilege. The truth is most minority families can’t rely on mommy and daddy’s money to attend private school.

Well, it’s a little racist to assume they can’t.

There aren’t tons, but there are enough minority families with second generation wealth (especially in dc) for you to come off a little tone deaf.

+1. The black families at our school are way richer than my white FA kid. I actually consider it kind of a bonus that my kid does not equate melanin with poverty!

Agree. Middle class Black people don't usually choose private school anyhow - it's usually the much wealthier ones who do. And there are no diversity scholarships - meaning, they don't give you money just because you are Black - so many are paying full freight. I'm a first generation college grad and also a lawyer. I've thought about sending my child to private but honestly, there is just not enough wealth in the family tree to fall back on and I have to help my parents financially here and there. Maybe my grandkids will have that option - that is something I would love to be able to do for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parochial schools are far less expensive and many offer financial aid. Private k-12 is a higher priority for us than college savings. For college- we will encourage state schools.

OP here, is parochial such as catholic school? Are those as good as the top private schools? How do they compare to a good public school?

Parochial schools are religious. Catholic, christian, Jewish. Each school is unique and you have to look at each one separately. Some are very strong academically- some less. They are generally less expensive and offer more aid. However, most families want to be there because of the religious environment.

Doesn't parochial specifically mean tethered to a specific place of worship? Like a church that has a primary school? Very few Catholic high schools are parochial but many seem to incorrectly use the parochial term.

No one considers anything but catholic schools attached to a diocese as parochial. If a school is not attached to a diocese system it is considered a religious private school. Now we can leave addressing to how parochial schools rank compared to religious private schools to another thread.

[Anonymous]

Back to the original question --

We can afford private for our 3 kids because my husband and I went to college, medical school and law school. We paid for our graduate schools. Worked the entire time (that is how we met). Worked hard (80 hours a week plus) after to get out of student loan debt and save for a nice house, private school, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One word -- grandparents

+1

Us as well.

And from what I can tell, at least one third of our school...

Two words: white privilege. The truth is most minority families can’t rely on mommy and daddy’s money to attend private school.

The phrase "white privilege" is growing old already. It doesn't explain everything in life. You really need to target your anger on Bezos, Zuckerberg, Buffet, and Dimon, etc. You're attacking people of roughly the same class as you because they are doing slightly better financially and making different choices than you. Redirect your anger elsewhere.

Yes, my son's mommy and daddy are paying for his LS. He's under 10 y/o - difficult to be self-made at that age. And before you start about my being born w a silver spoon in my mouth - think again. I was a latchkey kid of a single mom who attending junior college while I was in upper ES and MS and finished her BS while I was in HS. She went to law school when I went to college. I watched her bust her arse and tried to work even hard than she did. Took FA loans, the whole bit, and somehow overcame the odds with some luck, some mentoring, and some hard work. So go away with the privilege argument. It's stale.

"Roughly the same class as you" lol honey $200k or $400k or $1m is absolutely not the same class as someone making the median area income or below.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One word -- grandparents

+1

Us as well.

And from what I can tell, at least one third of our school...

Two words: white privilege. The truth is most minority families can’t rely on mommy and daddy’s money to attend private school. [/quot

Um, neither can most white people or people of any other race. Yeah, maybe the people who have grandparents who are able to do this are predominantly white, but this is still a very small minority of people either way. I'd love to have parents who were able to help out with tuition or anything else and I'm about as white as you can get. I was fortunate enough to have my parents help me pay for room and board during school and helped me in innumerable way, but I'm definitely not someone who came from "mommy daddy money" nor did my husband. I'm sure there are a disproportionate number of kids at the really expensive privates who do have grandparents in this bucket, but there are lots of private schools that are outside this small group with much smaller price tags.

Not defending white privilege or denying its existence, but don't act like this is some common thing among white people. White skin doesn't come with a trust fund.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One word -- grandparents

+1

Us as well.

And from what I can tell, at least one third of our school...

Two words: white privilege. The truth is most minority families can’t rely on mommy and daddy’s money to attend private school.

The phrase "white privilege" is growing old already. It doesn't explain everything in life. You really need to target your anger on Bezos, Zuckerberg, Buffet, and Dimon, etc. You're attacking people of roughly the same class as you because they are doing slightly better financially and making different choices than you. Redirect your anger elsewhere.

Yes, my son's mommy and daddy are paying for his LS. He's under 10 y/o - difficult to be self-made at that age. And before you start about my being born w a silver spoon in my mouth - think again. I was a latchkey kid of a single mom who attending junior college while I was in upper ES and MS and finished her BS while I was in HS. She went to law school when I went to college. I watched her bust her arse and tried to work even hard than she did. Took FA loans, the whole bit, and somehow overcame the odds with some luck, some mentoring, and some hard work. So go away with the privilege argument. It's stale.

"Roughly the same class as you" lol honey $200k or $400k or $1m is absolutely not the same class as someone making the median area income or below.

Do you know either of the posters' incomes? Why would you assume that the poster being replied to is making the median income while the responder is making up to a million? I'm assuming most people posting on a private school board tend to be somewhere above the median and middle to upper middle class just based on where they are going to school. You are making a lot of assumptions about posters based on basically nothing.

And totally agree that the "white privilege" argument is getting stale. Obviously having grandparents that can afford to pay for private school is extremely privileged no matter someone's race, but boiling basically everything down to "white privilege" or shutting down all arguments with the phrase "showing your privilege" is extremely shallow.