How do you afford private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We make somewhere around $350K and only one child, who attends one of the less expensive privates (around $20K). We would not be able to afford this with 2 kids, given our other expenses and lifestyle choices (we live in NW DC, take vacations, etc.).

I'm the PP with one kid. Yes, same here (though we live in MoCo). It's one reason why we made the conscious decision to have one kid. We want to still be able to go on vacations and save for college/retirement, while having flexibility around her schooling.

PP, yes, we also chose one child for lifestyle and parenting reasons--we have busy careers, and more than one kid would mean we'd have to outsource more, which we prefer not to. With two kids we would be back at our neighborhood school, which we liked fine before moving to private for immersion, but we're hearing about challenges during DL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We make about $190K. Have chosen private for each of our three kids for just a couple of key years in their educational journey. Our private is in the $20-24K/year range. A little help from grandparents (not full tuition, but about 60%) most years. For only two of the years we've had kids in private have we had two of them there at once; most years, one's been in private and the other two are in public.

We're in a small, old house with a $1400/mo mortgage; 10+ year old cars. We rarely eat out, don't have cable, use prepaid cell phone plans, etc. We live very modestly.

We are saving well for college and retirement.

Grandparents subsidizing more that 50% of the cost of private school (to the tune of $12,000 to $28,000 pr year) is hardly "a little help." But, whatever you have to tell yourself to make yourself feel better.

[Anonymous]

I’m a PP here. The amount of people here with family wealth or grandparents paying for it is so demoralizing. No wonder we feel broke.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m a PP here. The amount of people here with family wealth or grandparents paying for it is so demoralizing. No wonder we feel broke.

Most of the people on this thread admit to making well over $200k a year and you feel broke?

[Anonymous]

I know a two teacher family with three kids in the $50K a year privates. The tuition is more than their HHI. (which is public information)

They've never shown me their bank statements or budget, but unless they have a money tree in their backyard, they get A SHIT LOAD of financial aid.

[Anonymous]

We make $110K. I'm a SAHM who does temporary gigs of about $4K - 12K a year. Our 3 kids are in parochial school for about $15K total. We used our $3500 in stimulus bucks this year for part of the tuition.

Otherwise, we never travel by plane. Likely will never go to Disney or Europe. My husband drives my 12 year old car from college. We don't do extracurriculars outside of town rec league. Lots and lots of library books. Craigslist and facebook marketplace for new bikes, furniture, baby supplies.

We don't do financial aid because the amount of disclosure required is really uncomfortable.

We picked a semi rural part of New England to raise the kids. Who needs travel soccer when you can snow blow 4 months out of the year every Saturday morning?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m a PP here. The amount of people here with family wealth or grandparents paying for it is so demoralizing. No wonder we feel broke.

Not to be mean, but you are only kidding yourself if you think private schools are populated by anything but a majority of wealthy families; whether self made or via grandparents. Of course there are some in low 6 figure income families making the stretch to cover tuition and other families who are receiving substantial FA (but still making major sacrifices to cover their portion of tuition), but the vast majority of families who choose private school (vs subsidized parochial/religious schools) fit the uber wealth model.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a PP here. The amount of people here with family wealth or grandparents paying for it is so demoralizing. No wonder we feel broke.

Not to be mean, but you are only kidding yourself if you think private schools are populated by anything but a majority of wealthy families; whether self made or via grandparents. Of course there are some in low 6 figure income families making the stretch to cover tuition and other families who are receiving substantial FA (but still making major sacrifices to cover their portion of tuition), but the vast majority of families who choose private school (vs subsidized parochial/religious schools) fit the uber wealth model.

This- and when you see the college acceptance numbers, keep in mind that your schools applicants likely had full pay and legacy. If your kid doesn't those numbers are worthless to them in their situation (or actively hurt them if schools don't want too many kids from the same high school)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a PP here. The amount of people here with family wealth or grandparents paying for it is so demoralizing. No wonder we feel broke.

Not to be mean, but you are only kidding yourself if you think private schools are populated by anything but a majority of wealthy families; whether self made or via grandparents. Of course there are some in low 6 figure income families making the stretch to cover tuition and other families who are receiving substantial FA (but still making major sacrifices to cover their portion of tuition), but the vast majority of families who choose private school (vs subsidized parochial/religious schools) fit the uber wealth model.

This- and when you see the college acceptance numbers, keep in mind that your schools applicants likely had full pay and legacy. If your kid doesn't those numbers are worthless to them in their situation (or actively hurt them if schools don't want too many kids from the same high school)

That's true for most private schools, but not all.

The high school I went to provides about 1% of Harvard's entering class each year. About 20% of the class goes to Ivies every year, and another 20-25% go to Ivy equivalent schools. That means a pretty high number of kids to each of those schools.

There are absolutely rich kids who go to that school, but lots of kids are on FA.

[Anonymous]

Worked hard at good paying jobs, HHI over 2mil. Don’t even feel the cost for 2 kids.


Good career choice and luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m a PP here. The amount of people here with family wealth or grandparents paying for it is so demoralizing. No wonder we feel broke.

What’s wrong with it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a PP here. The amount of people here with family wealth or grandparents paying for it is so demoralizing. No wonder we feel broke.

Not to be mean, but you are only kidding yourself if you think private schools are populated by anything but a majority of wealthy families; whether self made or via grandparents. Of course there are some in low 6 figure income families making the stretch to cover tuition and other families who are receiving substantial FA (but still making major sacrifices to cover their portion of tuition), but the vast majority of families who choose private school (vs subsidized parochial/religious schools) fit the uber wealth model.

This- and when you see the college acceptance numbers, keep in mind that your schools applicants likely had full pay and legacy. If your kid doesn't those numbers are worthless to them in their situation (or actively hurt them if schools don't want too many kids from the same high school)

That's true for most private schools, but not all.

The high school I went to provides about 1% of Harvard's entering class each year. About 20% of the class goes to Ivies every year, and another 20-25% go to Ivy equivalent schools. That means a pretty high number of kids to each of those schools.

There are absolutely rich kids who go to that school, but lots of kids are on FA.

there are unicorn schools- if my kids wen to Groton, I'd expect Harvard. I don't think schools like that really exist in this area

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We make $400k and pay $47k for one child. It's painful and we often wonder what the heck we're doing. Also--tuition goes up by $1500-3K a year. Most schools had a reprieve in tuition increase this year due to Covid but I'm sure a large increase is coming next year for all schools. Also, various fees and many donation requests (we donate small amounts) tack on another few thousand per year.
Our income level is pretty rare at the school.

That’s under 12% of your annual income, which is pretty reasonable. I’m having a hard time understanding how that is a hardship.

400k income is rare?

Are you implying that it is in the richer side or poor side of the average.

We make 7 figures and sometimes look around and feel poor compared to some of the parents in our school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We make about $190K. Have chosen private for each of our three kids for just a couple of key years in their educational journey. Our private is in the $20-24K/year range. A little help from grandparents (not full tuition, but about 60%) most years. For only two of the years we've had kids in private have we had two of them there at once; most years, one's been in private and the other two are in public.

We're in a small, old house with a $1400/mo mortgage; 10+ year old cars. We rarely eat out, don't have cable, use prepaid cell phone plans, etc. We live very modestly.

We are saving well for college and retirement.

OP here, is that 190k after taxes or before? Do your children do any enrichment activities?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We make $400k and pay $47k for one child. It's painful and we often wonder what the heck we're doing. Also--tuition goes up by $1500-3K a year. Most schools had a reprieve in tuition increase this year due to Covid but I'm sure a large increase is coming next year for all schools. Also, various fees and many donation requests (we donate small amounts) tack on another few thousand per year.
Our income level is pretty rare at the school.

That’s under 12% of your annual income, which is pretty reasonable. I’m having a hard time understanding how that is a hardship.

400k income is rare?

Are you implying that it is in the richer side or poor side of the average.

We make 7 figures and sometimes look around and feel poor compared to some of the parents in our school.

I'm the poster you replied to.

Rare as in poor. At 400K we are definitely income for this private. Which is crazy of course as we are upper middle class in any other context. But the wealth at the top privates is insane as you too (feeling "poor" at 7 figures) can attest.