Mystery with nanny and Christmas bonus

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m surprised that you didn’t switch to direct depositing her bonus after the first time. This would raise a red flag to me that she has money problems and sees you as a deep pocket. Are you sure she isn’t stealing from you?

Op here. I know she isn’t stealing.

We normally do direct deposit. This is an exception, because it’s a gift, and we aren’t taking taxes out on it. That made me not want to direct deposit it. We normally have a payroll service do everything for us but this was going through a separate channel since it’s a gift.

Just FYI, an employer can’t give a cash gift to an employee without withholding taxes-that’s not a thing. If you are trying to be elegant, you should pay the bonus in the same way you pay the wage.

Of course you can. The amount that is withheld is not related to the amount that is due. In other words, it’s still taxable income, but that doesn’t mean the amount has to be withheld by the employer at the time it’s given to the employee.

[Anonymous]

Yet you keep leaving your kids with her? Nice try troll.

[Anonymous]

You gave her the bonus; it’s not your problem what happened after it was in her hands. I’d commiserate, agree was bad turn of events but wouldn’t double bonus her.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't even spend time worrying about this. I gave her the money she smoked it, lost it, gambled it, tossed it in the trash, sniffed it, or lost it -- but the key is that I would not be giving her more money or asking anymore questions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here. I do think it was a lie, partially because she seemed taken aback when I pointed out that she had supposedly lost a large of of money in the exact same way a year ago. I think she had lied last year and forgotten, and then told me the same story again without realizing it.

Now, I’m not sure why she’s lying to me. It seems likely it’s a scam. I’m not sure what other reason she would have for lying to me about this. She did in passing say something about using a check next time, but I’m not seeing how that solves the problem. If she loses cash she could lose a check, and who knows if I could get the check cancelled and reissued or if it would fall into the wrong hands or what.

The whole thing has kind of soured our relationship a bit and we are looking for how to accelerate our plans to no longer work with her.

You write "For Deposit Only," and it cannot be cashed directly, only deposited into a bank account under that person's name. So it's trackable. And yes, a check can be cancelled for a fee.

https://www.consumerfinance.gov/ask-cfpb/what-does-it-mean-for-a-check-to-be-indorsed-for-deposit-only-en-947/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yet you keep leaving your kids with her? Nice try troll.

Op here. I work from home so I don’t actually have to leave my kids with her alone.

I’m not a troll-ask Jeff if you like.

We are looking to extricate ourselves from this situation sooner rather than later. At the same time, it’s only now that this happened a 2nd time that I’ve had reason to not trust her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't even spend time worrying about this. I gave her the money she smoked it, lost it, gambled it, tossed it in the trash, sniffed it, or lost it -- but the key is that I would not be giving her more money or asking anymore questions.

Op here. I agree. My post wasn’t asking whether I should pay her or do anything - I don’t intend to. I was only posting to see what the opinions/consensus was on what is going on here.

This happened a week ago and we have not discussed it since the day she told me about it.

[Anonymous]

She’s scamming you. I had this exact same situation happen to me and she expected me to replace the money she lost!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe she forgot she tried it last year. Or she thought you'd forget. Maybe she has friends who this has worked for and they talk about it.

+1

OP, write a check next time. You can cancel a check for a minimal fee. Done.

Op here. I guess part of it is, we probably should be taking taxes out on it. So I’d prefer to either do cash or pay her via our normal payroll service. I don’t really want to write her a personal check out of my account. Especially given I’ve got some trust issues with her.

I guess we will do a money order next time but it’s just another annoying thing on my list. I’m annoyed with her.

Yes Op. You are well aware that bonuses (even Christmas bonuses) are considered taxable income. Consider this the universe telling you to pay your bonus on the books next time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe she forgot she tried it last year. Or she thought you'd forget. Maybe she has friends who this has worked for and they talk about it.

+1

OP, write a check next time. You can cancel a check for a minimal fee. Done.

Op here. I guess part of it is, we probably should be taking taxes out on it. So I’d prefer to either do cash or pay her via our normal payroll service. I don’t really want to write her a personal check out of my account. Especially given I’ve got some trust issues with her.

I guess we will do a money order next time but it’s just another annoying thing on my list. I’m annoyed with her.

Yes Op. You are well aware that bonuses (even Christmas bonuses) are considered taxable income. Consider this the universe telling you to pay your bonus on the books next time.

Or the universe is telling her to find a new nanny.

[Anonymous]

I would be very reluctant to give her a bonus next year .