When family visits who pays?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In my culture, parents should never pay for anything, regardless of who is visiting. I think it's very odd and rude that you expect them to treat you while you visit them.

Yikes, what a burden on a young, growing family.

Reminds me of when my Turkish grandmother would agree to babysit us “for free” but demand my mother cook her dinner and feed her when she arrived to babysit! What an expectation.

Guess who was last call to babysit?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dh and I are younger (30) and make less than both of our parents, but when they visit we pay for all meals in our house. When we got out, we either go dutch or split every other meal. Our parents haven't ever paid for us since we were 21 with full time jobs.

DH's sister and her husband make us pay every time we go out. I assume because they think we make more money, but in reality we probably make the same and are just more frugal (and thus had money for a nice house).

Weird. In both cases.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my culture, parents should never pay for anything, regardless of who is visiting. I think it's very odd and rude that you expect them to treat you while you visit them.

Right, I'd rather make my DC-based son, wife and young kids pay for us for everything when we houseguest with them.
They can inherit our money later, for now, they pay! They live here in America and DC, where everyone is rich and the streets are paved with gold.

Lol

[Anonymous]

I pay for the bed and breakfast they pay everything else

[Anonymous]

We have a lot of money, scads more than my siblings, so I pay for everything regardless of who is visiting whom. Our parents worked hard, but had little money, so there was no inheritance. The money my siblings have is what they have. If I can do anything to make their lives easier, I will.

TBH, I do not feel similarly with SiL. They are UMC by most definitions, even if she doesn't feel as rich as she did when she was a kid. She got her parents to contribute to her DCs' expensive college educations w/o having to declare it on her FAFSA forms, money her parents may now need if things progress as they are. Yet she spends a lot of time focused on how the family assets will be divided and what she deserves because of X, Y, Z reasons.

My siblings are always grateful for what we do yet have no expectations that we will.