No judgment in law thread

[Anonymous]

I know you're supposed to say "it's the thought that counts" when you receive a gift but some of the gifts I get from in laws are so thoughtless it just seems like they went into a store grabbed things at random. Latest example was my FIL buying my infant daughter a box of different toys that were all choking hazards and were clearly marked "for children 3 and up"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know you're supposed to say "it's the thought that counts" when you receive a gift but some of the gifts I get from in laws are so thoughtless it just seems like they went into a store grabbed things at random. Latest example was my FIL buying my infant daughter a box of different toys that were all choking hazards and were clearly marked "for children 3 and up"

Oh the gifts... My DH (who rarely cooks) got a set of meat rubs, a set of hot sauces and a knit cap from his parents (my IL's). That was it. It was better than what they got me but still. Horrible. He was really hurt. He spent a lot of time (and a good amount of money) picking out gifts for them that he thought they'd like. I won't mention what they got me but it is going into the under $10 white elephant pile for next year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know you're supposed to say "it's the thought that counts" when you receive a gift but some of the gifts I get from in laws are so thoughtless it just seems like they went into a store grabbed things at random. Latest example was my FIL buying my infant daughter a box of different toys that were all choking hazards and were clearly marked "for children 3 and up"

My MIL gave my 2-year-old daughter EASTER EGG CONFETTI from the dollar store for Easter two years ago.

[Anonymous]

Why can't you be content with a genuine and heartfelt "thank you" for the gift, MIL? Why must you always repeat how nice it is, how much thought you put into it, how you're glaaaaaaad to be able to give, etc.?

"That's a MELISSA AND DOUG set, you know."
"Those potatoes I brought are ORGANIC, I just wanted to make sure you saw."
"Well, we're just so happy we can be in a position to help you this weekend."
"That's a LILY PULITZER DRESS, did you see?"

Thank you. Seriously, thank you. Why must you light yourself on fire to get attention and praise?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dear in laws. I don't care about your genealogy. I don't want your dead fathers carving knives as a holiday present. My DH doesn't know what to do with the inkwell that belonged to your grandfather. Stop giving us stuff you don't feel like storing in the basement anymore.

I'm enjoying this thread but this one I find kind of sad. Are you really young PP? Do you not have kids? This is their heritage and those are special items. Keep it for the next generation.

Bitch, I'm 40 years old with 2 children and on the NO JUDGMENT IN LAWS thread. So please just go away. You're welcome to the 60 year old potty seat, if you really want it, but my kid thinks its gross.

[Anonymous]

We have a basement full of junk my DH's grandfather made when he was going through a woodworking phase. My in-laws also keep giving us this stuff. I would be thrilled if his grandfather was skilled but he wasn't. It's like shop class work in my basement.

[Anonymous]

In laws insisted on chain restaurant for taking us out to dinner, then bitched and moaned that we never take them to the good DC restaurants.

Mind you, I said, get we really like X, Y, and Z downtown - would you prefer that over TGIFridays? And got the response "TGIFridays is great. We like it. It's too bad if you don't."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Super minor complaint compared to others, but despite DH suggesting to his mom that I would enjoy things other than clothes, she insists on buying me clothes as gifts-- and always a size too big. MIL always talks about how thin she was when she was my age, so the constant mis-sizing feels like a tacit judgement of my size (I'm a medium, not a large). She knows I returned last years items that were too big (DH navigated that one...)- but still bought the same wrong sizes this year. She also can't remember anything about my family- including basic things like how many siblings I have (much less remembering their names!)

I'm so sorry! That all stinks!

Time to start buying her clothes, one size too small...

Freaking brilliant idea!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How is it that my FIL can sit on his ass and watch almost everyone else do all the work. He doesn't so much as carry a glass to the sink. And he sits for hours in the middle of the kitchen at my island watching all the work. WTF? He is physically able. Though why should I expect anything else -- it's been like this the whole time I've known him.

Do we have the same FIL? Last night, he sat down at dinner and immediately started eating. He was done before I and MIL finished serving everyone and sat down ourselves.

My FIL dug right in to his food on Xmas as the rest of the family and guests were going through my buffet line. He was almost done before the table was full of guests.
He also insists on calling for mid-meal toasts and repeatedly clanks on my antique waterford with a knife to get our attention.

[Anonymous]

One more thing. My in laws insists on putting quotation marks around my name when writing it. I go by a form of my name as a nickname, always have, always will - my parents decided to use it exclusively as a compromise while naming me a longer family name - but really, quotation marks? It's a bit much.
- "Jennie"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dear in laws. I don't care about your genealogy. I don't want your dead fathers carving knives as a holiday present. My DH doesn't know what to do with the inkwell that belonged to your grandfather. Stop giving us stuff you don't feel like storing in the basement anymore.

I'm enjoying this thread but this one I find kind of sad. Are you really young PP? Do you not have kids? This is their heritage and those are special items. Keep it for the next generation.

Eh, I have inlaws like this. It becomes really, really just a transfer of junk after a while, or even if not junk, just transfer of stuff that is meaningless- a factory made, run of the mill, department store bedside table from the 1960s isn't an heirloom, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dear in laws. I don't care about your genealogy. I don't want your dead fathers carving knives as a holiday present. My DH doesn't know what to do with the inkwell that belonged to your grandfather. Stop giving us stuff you don't feel like storing in the basement anymore.

I'm enjoying this thread but this one I find kind of sad. Are you really young PP? Do you not have kids? This is their heritage and those are special items. Keep it for the next generation.

Eh, I have inlaws like this. It becomes really, really just a transfer of junk after a while, or even if not junk, just transfer of stuff that is meaningless- a factory made, run of the mill, department store bedside table from the 1960s isn't an heirloom, etc.

+1

It's insulting. And please, don't give the guy who married in the purple heart from FIL. He doesn't care about your FIL's purple heart, but your grandson bearing his name DOES.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How is it that my FIL can sit on his ass and watch almost everyone else do all the work. He doesn't so much as carry a glass to the sink. And he sits for hours in the middle of the kitchen at my island watching all the work. WTF? He is physically able. Though why should I expect anything else -- it's been like this the whole time I've known him.

Do we have the same FIL? Last night, he sat down at dinner and immediately started eating. He was done before I and MIL finished serving everyone and sat down ourselves.

My FIL dug right in to his food on Xmas as the rest of the family and guests were going through my buffet line. He was almost done before the table was full of guests.
He also insists on calling for mid-meal toasts and repeatedly clanks on my antique waterford with a knife to get our attention.

I don't know how long your buffet line was but do you really expect people to sit with hot food in front of them while a dozen or more other people wait in line? That's cray cray. It's not a sit down dinner.

And there is nothing wrong with a mid meal toast.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How is it that my FIL can sit on his ass and watch almost everyone else do all the work. He doesn't so much as carry a glass to the sink. And he sits for hours in the middle of the kitchen at my island watching all the work. WTF? He is physically able. Though why should I expect anything else -- it's been like this the whole time I've known him.

Do we have the same FIL? Last night, he sat down at dinner and immediately started eating. He was done before I and MIL finished serving everyone and sat down ourselves.

My FIL dug right in to his food on Xmas as the rest of the family and guests were going through my buffet line. He was almost done before the table was full of guests.
He also insists on calling for mid-meal toasts and repeatedly clanks on my antique waterford with a knife to get our attention.

I don't know how long your buffet line was but do you really expect people to sit with hot food in front of them while a dozen or more other people wait in line? That's cray cray. It's not a sit down dinner.

And there is nothing wrong with a mid meal toast.

Are you serious? Many families pray together before a meal, especially during the holidays. And most buffets when people are visiting are a necessity because of extra visitors, but aren't huge amounts of people like at a wedding. You wait until hostess sits down and takes a bite, or tells you to begin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How is it that my FIL can sit on his ass and watch almost everyone else do all the work. He doesn't so much as carry a glass to the sink. And he sits for hours in the middle of the kitchen at my island watching all the work. WTF? He is physically able. Though why should I expect anything else -- it's been like this the whole time I've known him.

Do we have the same FIL? Last night, he sat down at dinner and immediately started eating. He was done before I and MIL finished serving everyone and sat down ourselves.

My FIL dug right in to his food on Xmas as the rest of the family and guests were going through my buffet line. He was almost done before the table was full of guests.
He also insists on calling for mid-meal toasts and repeatedly clanks on my antique waterford with a knife to get our attention.

I don't know how long your buffet line was but do you really expect people to sit with hot food in front of them while a dozen or more other people wait in line? That's cray cray. It's not a sit down dinner.

And there is nothing wrong with a mid meal toast.

One mid-meal toast? Great! Several? Know. That just means you want attention, and people want to eat and talk.