Deal Middle School -- no leggings

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

If you think this is okay for a 12 year old girl, yes, I judge you. It has nothing to do with a girl "coming into her body" it has to no with self respect for one's body. Want to wear this at the beach, idk, but don't send your kids to school like this and don't fight because the school is trying to fight this.

You don't even seem to understand the point. Girls bodies belong to them - not to the general public. Unless they ask you directly what you think of their clothes, you can assume that they (and their parents) are not interested. Telling girls what they can and cannot wear sends the message that they have to present themselves in a way that is pleasing to other people - and that's more important than pleasing themselves.

It is creepy and controlling for you to be so judgemental about what other people are wearing and I find it impossible to understand why you (and school administrators) feel justified in expressing your (unwanted) opinions.

(Also - maybe lay off on the Google searches for pictures of teenagers asses.)

THank you. What a weird obsession these scolds have with finding pictures.

Actually it's quite easy...Google "inappropriate leggings"

I have no doubt they're easy to find. Lots of demand for them from people like you.

[Anonymous]

You forgot hats ... no baseball caps in school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

If you think this is okay for a 12 year old girl, yes, I judge you. It has nothing to do with a girl "coming into her body" it has to no with self respect for one's body. Want to wear this at the beach, idk, but don't send your kids to school like this and don't fight because the school is trying to fight this.

You don't even seem to understand the point. Girls bodies belong to them - not to the general public. Unless they ask you directly what you think of their clothes, you can assume that they (and their parents) are not interested. Telling girls what they can and cannot wear sends the message that they have to present themselves in a way that is pleasing to other people - and that's more important than pleasing themselves.

It is creepy and controlling for you to be so judgemental about what other people are wearing and I find it impossible to understand why you (and school administrators) feel justified in expressing your (unwanted) opinions.

(Also - maybe lay off on the Google searches for pictures of teenagers asses.)

THank you. What a weird obsession these scolds have with finding pictures.

Actually it's quite easy...Google "inappropriate leggings"

I have no doubt they're easy to find. Lots of demand for them from people like you.

Or lots of people wearing them getting caught on the do not wear blogs. I'm sure you and your teen daughter have a matching pair. Congrats. You won mom of the year.

[Anonymous]

For what it's worth, a male friend works as a substitute teacher/professor at a variety of levels, including college, and says that the leggings situation is out of control. Some leave nothing to imagine and that he - nice Catholic boy - would wish the girls would not dress that way. He feels he is professional, but they are not. They also create a problem for the male students.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For what it's worth, a male friend works as a substitute teacher/professor at a variety of levels, including college, and says that the leggings situation is out of control. Some leave nothing to imagine and that he - nice Catholic boy - would wish the girls would not dress that way. He feels he is professional, but they are not. They also create a problem for the male students.

How exactly is the 'leggings situation' out of control? What are the measurable effects of the 'situation.' And what problem do they create for male classmates that those boys won't have to deal with outside of school?

[Anonymous]

Leggings were designed to be worn instead of tights under a dress/tunic/skirt
They last longer than tights and are warmer than tights. This is how they should be worn.
You wouldnt wear a pair of tights with a shirt that only comes to the waist top so dont do it with leggings.

[Anonymous]

As a teacher, I wear leggings all the time - under a tunic or dress, often with boots. I would never teach class in form fitting leggings and a short top. I will also tell you these girls have zero to burgeoning body awareness and that's fine. I usually see utter cluelessness from.kids at this age in their fashion choices. It's much more about what parents allow/dont allow than about their fragile self images or perceived body shaming. This sounds much more like your issue than your daughters, though now you've made it hers . Since parents will obviously allow a spectrum of clothing, it's fine - actually desirable - for a school to set a standard. Dress codes are never perfect and hopefully the school will treat it discipline wise as a community 'goal' ( ie gentle reminders, not suspensions) . It's amazing how few parents understand that dress guidelines take the pressure off, rather than put it on. There is ample time outside of school for your kids sartorial splendor to shine. Take heart.

[Anonymous]

If someone came to school in see-through leggings, I am pretty sure the same of her peers would take care of it.

[Anonymous]

of course it's sexist. so are most of the disgraceful posts in this thread. may none of you have daughters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If someone came to school in see-through leggings, I am pretty sure the same of her peers would take care of it.

So you'd like ' peer justice' in middle.school, rather than the adults setting the norm? Wow, just wow. How about when the peers encourage smoking? That cool.too?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For what it's worth, a male friend works as a substitute teacher/professor at a variety of levels, including college, and says that the leggings situation is out of control. Some leave nothing to imagine and that he - nice Catholic boy - would wish the girls would not dress that way. He feels he is professional, but they are not. They also create a problem for the male students.

How exactly is the 'leggings situation' out of control? What are the measurable effects of the 'situation.' And what problem do they create for male classmates that those boys won't have to deal with outside of school?

Well now that I understand how a 12-year-old wearing leggings could affect a nice catholic boy I'm sold! SMH

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For what it's worth, a male friend works as a substitute teacher/professor at a variety of levels, including college, and says that the leggings situation is out of control. Some leave nothing to imagine and that he - nice Catholic boy - would wish the girls would not dress that way. He feels he is professional, but they are not. They also create a problem for the male students.

How exactly is the 'leggings situation' out of control? What are the measurable effects of the 'situation.' And what problem do they create for male classmates that those boys won't have to deal with outside of school?

Well now that I understand how a 12-year-old wearing leggings could affect a nice catholic boy I'm sold! SMH

So the goal of school now is that kids 'deal' with everything they would need to deal with out of school? So are you OK with cussing in halls and cussing out each other/adults? How about a little dice on the playground? Or does the desire for 'no rules' and 'real life' scenarios only apply to your daughter/leggings? I hope they have a rule about kids pulling up their pants as well. Despite the fact that it's delightfully funny to watch the Deal/Wilson students try to make a light while holding up their pants with one hand--no one should have to look at anyone's undies in the classroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

You don't even seem to understand the point. Girls bodies belong to them - not to the general public. Unless they ask you directly what you think of their clothes, you can assume that they (and their parents) are not interested. Telling girls what they can and cannot wear sends the message that they have to present themselves in a way that is pleasing to other people - and that's more important than pleasing themselves.

It is creepy and controlling for you to be so judgemental about what other people are wearing and I find it impossible to understand why you (and school administrators) feel justified in expressing your (unwanted) opinions.

(Also - maybe lay off on the Google searches for pictures of teenagers asses.)

NP here. You don't seem to understand decorum, and you also cannot grasp that not every attire rule is about slut shaming and putting a thumb on the righteous power of the female. 'taint about girls bodies "belonging" to them. Duh. They can't do whatever they please with their bodies just because those bodies belong to them. They can't use their fierce bodies to kick a classmate in the throat, poop on the floor, have sex against their locker, or walk nude down the hall before first bell.

Breathe. And note that attire standards apply to all students, not just the girls.

Here are some other things that wouldn't be OK at Deal:

New poster.

+1000

Thank you for some common sense in this thread.

All of these "don't slut shame posts" are so ridiculous, for two reasons.

First, you talk as if there is no limit to what you would allow students to wear in middle school. That slut-positive rhetoric is applicable to adults walking around in public. We are talking about students at school here. If an adult woman wants to walk around topless in one of the cities where it is legal, I salute her. If a middle schooler does it at school, I tell her to put a shirt on.

Second, since you are trying so hard to be feminist, you should do some reading on how fashion choices can be both feminist and non feminist depending on the situation. Just because a middle school girl is making her own choice to wear tight revealing clothing, doesn't mean that allowing her the choice is feminist. You are her parent. You have to consider the peer pressure and other pressures that she feels. Here's a start, a comic that explains it better than I could:

http://everydayfeminism.com/2015/07/choices-not-always-feminist/

[Anonymous]

I'm just laughing so hard...

Let's load the poor Deal administration up with our bodyshaming thesis right at the year start.

great beginnings!

nothing else to prioritize!

DC parent 'we know better' backseat drivers!

[Anonymous]

I love the name-calling among people who disagree with those who are uncomfortable with the policy.

You've said:

--stupid
--not good at feminism
--bad parents
--ridiculous
--didn't use liberal arts education well
--hope you don't have daughters
--backseat drivers.

And also claimed that we must support booty shorts, transparent pants, and visible thongs. You've claimed that we have no other priorities and that people who dress differently than you allow look "whorish."

You've claimed that people who oppose the policy have planted this idea in their daughter's minds and thus created the problem. You've claimed we're encouraging them to hate the rules.

In fact the OP wrote that she did NOT plan to bring it up with the administration and that her daughter expressed a concern on her own. But you've ignored that.

It's one thing to disagree and another to insult people for their point of view.

Fortunately the people you are insulting are, in fact, quite capable of parenting our daughters. We're capable of helping them present themselves in a dignified manner while in leggings. We're capable of instilling and maintaining respect for rules. We're capable of distinguishing between booty shorts and standard Lands End and Children's Place apparel. We're not stupid. We're capable of supporting our school administrations even when we disagree with certain policies.

In short, we do not need to be scolded.