Mensa

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thank you for the additional responses.

To the pp who feels she was similar to my DD as a kid I reallay appreicate the support. It's hard to explain her to people if they don't know her. She's not a complete social outcast as she is really outgoing and has friends, but there is just something different and a void it seems she has. She'll state that she knows she's different but doesn't know why. We don't tell her she's smart or show her the test scores, but she just knows she's different and it breaks my heart a little to see her struggling to understand why. While homeschooling is not an option for us I can see how it could be a great option for her. That's why I'm trying to at least find activities outside of school. She uses Khan Academy on her own (I monitor progress) but I was hoping Mensa would be a more interactive activity.

Thanks for the recommednation on the foreign language. Someone told me that Duolingo is a free language learning site but I haven't checked it out yet.

Her NNAT score was 149. We didn't prep her or even tell her about the test.

To pp who stated that there are many gifted kids that are socially skilled, I agree. DD isn't a complete outcast but I know she needs to work on these skills. However, it's hard to watch a teacher be understanding that Johnny still isn't reading well in 2nd grade and provide extra support for him while they just tell me they are frustrated by my DD because she has a messy desk and doesn't want to transition to the next assignment because she wants to keep exploring the previous one. The current teacher states she understands that DD excels intellectually but they can't move her any farther ahead or provide her with any additional resources in 2nd grade, but she can just be frustrating in the classroom. It's not Johnny's fault he can't read well and I don't think it's my DD's fault for absorbing information quickly and wanting to move forward faster and deeper into subjects.

I'm not sure what the answer is but I can't just beat into her that she has to stop talking when the lesson is over and must keep her desk organized when I'm not there. If you think the answer is punishment for these issues in a child like her I can tell you that it doesn't work. She's generally a very rule abiding kid (particularly with safety), but she has a severe stubborn streak in her when it comes to learning/facts/concepts. I don't want to crush her spirit and desire for learning simply because the school can't provide for her academic needs at this time.

I was hoping that finding another outlet for her would help her stop being so "frustrating" to the teacher.

Wh did you say she was barely passing?

I'd like to know this too. I wouldn't care if my kid was testing off the charts. If the schoolwork was suffering, I would be addressing that first before I'd be working on attaining a meaningless label. As your child matures, no one will care what label he/she has, it is the end result that matters. If a child is in special ed but has fabulous grades and is well behaved, do you think that matters (compared to the Mensa kid who is a slob, barely passes, etc.)? I'd refocus my efforts on what I'd be focusing on, but that is just me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the schoolwork was suffering, I would be addressing that first before I'd be working on attaining a meaningless label.

I agree. It's a classic example of a gifted underachiever.

http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/underachievement.htm

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thank you for the additional responses.

To the pp who feels she was similar to my DD as a kid I reallay appreicate the support. It's hard to explain her to people if they don't know her. She's not a complete social outcast as she is really outgoing and has friends, but there is just something different and a void it seems she has. She'll state that she knows she's different but doesn't know why. We don't tell her she's smart or show her the test scores, but she just knows she's different and it breaks my heart a little to see her struggling to understand why. While homeschooling is not an option for us I can see how it could be a great option for her. That's why I'm trying to at least find activities outside of school. She uses Khan Academy on her own (I monitor progress) but I was hoping Mensa would be a more interactive activity.

Thanks for the recommednation on the foreign language. Someone told me that Duolingo is a free language learning site but I haven't checked it out yet.

Her NNAT score was 149. We didn't prep her or even tell her about the test.

To pp who stated that there are many gifted kids that are socially skilled, I agree. DD isn't a complete outcast but I know she needs to work on these skills. However, it's hard to watch a teacher be understanding that Johnny still isn't reading well in 2nd grade and provide extra support for him while they just tell me they are frustrated by my DD because she has a messy desk and doesn't want to transition to the next assignment because she wants to keep exploring the previous one.[u] The current teacher states she understands that DD excels intellectually but they can't move her any farther ahead or provide her with any additional resources in 2nd grade, but she can just be frustrating in the classroom. It's not Johnny's fault he can't read well and I don't think it's my DD's fault for absorbing information quickly and wanting to move forward faster and deeper into subjects.

I'm not sure what the answer is but I can't just beat into her that she has to stop talking when the lesson is over and must keep her desk organized when I'm not there. If you think the answer is punishment for these issues in a child like her I can tell you that it doesn't work. She's generally a very rule abiding kid (particularly with safety), but she has a severe stubborn streak in her when it comes to learning/facts/concepts. I don't want to crush her spirit and desire for learning simply because the school can't provide for her academic needs at this time.

I was hoping that finding another outlet for her would help her stop being so "frustrating" to the teacher.

Shouldn't a teacher be frustrated if a child of your child's age isn't easily transitioning to the next task? The teacher is teaching a whole class, not just your child. There is a curriculum and time line in which it must be completed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thank you for the additional responses.

To the pp who feels she was similar to my DD as a kid I reallay appreicate the support. It's hard to explain her to people if they don't know her. She's not a complete social outcast as she is really outgoing and has friends, but there is just something different and a void it seems she has. She'll state that she knows she's different but doesn't know why. We don't tell her she's smart or show her the test scores, but she just knows she's different and it breaks my heart a little to see her struggling to understand why. While homeschooling is not an option for us I can see how it could be a great option for her. That's why I'm trying to at least find activities outside of school. She uses Khan Academy on her own (I monitor progress) but I was hoping Mensa would be a more interactive activity.

Thanks for the recommednation on the foreign language. Someone told me that Duolingo is a free language learning site but I haven't checked it out yet.

Her NNAT score was 149. We didn't prep her or even tell her about the test.

To pp who stated that there are many gifted kids that are socially skilled, I agree. DD isn't a complete outcast but I know she needs to work on these skills. However, it's hard to watch a teacher be understanding that Johnny still isn't reading well in 2nd grade and provide extra support for him while they just tell me they are frustrated by my DD because she has a messy desk and doesn't want to transition to the next assignment because she wants to keep exploring the previous one.[u] The current teacher states she understands that DD excels intellectually but they can't move her any farther ahead or provide her with any additional resources in 2nd grade, but she can just be frustrating in the classroom. It's not Johnny's fault he can't read well and I don't think it's my DD's fault for absorbing information quickly and wanting to move forward faster and deeper into subjects.

I'm not sure what the answer is but I can't just beat into her that she has to stop talking when the lesson is over and must keep her desk organized when I'm not there. If you think the answer is punishment for these issues in a child like her I can tell you that it doesn't work. She's generally a very rule abiding kid (particularly with safety), but she has a severe stubborn streak in her when it comes to learning/facts/concepts. I don't want to crush her spirit and desire for learning simply because the school can't provide for her academic needs at this time.

I was hoping that finding another outlet for her would help her stop being so "frustrating" to the teacher.

Shouldn't a teacher be frustrated if a child of your child's age isn't easily transitioning to the next task? The teacher is teaching a whole class, not just your child. There is a curriculum and time line in which it must be completed.

No, apparently this child's brilliance should largely excuse behavior that should be curtailed in preschool. Quirky fine. Behavioral issues, okay, can be dealt with. Not listening repeatedly throughout the year when the teacher needs to move on, getting comments like "barely passing" a grade, etc. = not okay. This is a child whom you are excusing for being rude to her teacher because she is 'stubborn'? okayyyyyyyy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can you afford a Montessori primary program? Is there one near you?

It might work really well for her.

Others have mentioned this to us as well, but I don't think it's in our budget right now. But we may look into it depending on how each year goes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you checked out what is available to her through the John Hopkins Talent Search? There might be something there that she could do.

http://cty.jhu.edu/

Hoagies might also have resources for your daughter.

http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/

I'll check these out - thanks.

Also, to the posters recommending Davidson Young, this looks like a great program.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:140 something on NNAT is great of course, my DC got 160 but I'm not thinking DC should be treated differently for being who DC is- etc.- you can make your child's social interactions worse sometimes if you label your own kid (and try to manage it somehow). The post about your child failing 2nd grade and not listening- that would concern me more. We have so many resources available now that could help us as parents understand - I'd use that if I got mixed messages (which we did get for a while- not that we'd run for WISC testing but it was I guess an option).

OP here -fairly certain the test only scores up to 150. My DC scored a 149/150 with missing 1 problem and the age norming. I also have never stated nor do I feel my DC should be treated differently.

I'm not trying to manage her social interaction, but looking for additional resources and outlets for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I second the suggestion of talking to the teacher and school counselor. Many of the school counselors run something called "lunch bunch" where they take a group of students into their office during lunch and just work on social/conversational skills. Also - is she messy and/or disorganized at home. Maybe making a simple check sheet for her to keep on or in her desk with daily tasks that she needs to do to keep the desk organized. For super smart kids, simple organization doesn't always come easy but these same kids are great at following check sheets and rules.

The K teacher actually sent her to these a few times but the counselor came back and told her that our child didn't really belong in them. Our counselor focuses on kids that are either very shy or she has groups with kids with specific concerns (recent divorce, military parent deployed, etc.)

Her current 2nd grade teacher has recently given us more perspective on this. She feels DD interacts differently with kids during academic times versus social time (lunch, recess, etc). She's very social, so shyness isn't an issue, and during social times she seems to get along with kids just fine. During academic times is where she is having the awkward issues.

As for the messy/disorganized at home - it's a two-fold answer. No, when it comes to basic routines. We have framed chore lists (kids use dry erase crayons on the frame glass to check off their chores). We have bins labeled for shoes, winter hats/gloves, etc and she seems to be able to easily follow these routines. The answer is yes when it comes to cleaning up or staying organized when she's doing an art project, building something, anything academic or creative.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I second the suggestion of talking to the teacher and school counselor. Many of the school counselors run something called "lunch bunch" where they take a group of students into their office during lunch and just work on social/conversational skills. Also - is she messy and/or disorganized at home. Maybe making a simple check sheet for her to keep on or in her desk with daily tasks that she needs to do to keep the desk organized. For super smart kids, simple organization doesn't always come easy but these same kids are great at following check sheets and rules.

Hi- I just posted about my DC (160 score)- DC is not organized- drives me crazy- DC will got from an extreme book or design and then leave everything a mess- always creating (DH wants to patent one of DCs ideas). I have to remind DC daily on kinda simple stuff (though they can recite it) - DC is really focused on many things a lot and keeps inventing ways or processes (most are not new but others are DCs version). Can you please elaborate on this? DCs teacher also brought this up- saying DC was in their own world- but then said it was who DC was- like accepting DC for this "negative" but also appreciating the + (teacher -like us- loves DC and in particular DC's creativity/complex thinking). I am really truly asking- not trying to brag as I have read in PP.

OP again - Not sure if you are referring to my pp as bragging, but if so I'm sorry you feel that way. If not, then I think you are experiencing some of the same issues we are except that we did not have a teacher that understood her last year (in 1st). K teacher and now 2nd grade teacher seem to "get" her and appeciate her strengths while acknowledging her issues.

For the lunch bunch meeitngs, your school counselor is the one that should host them so they'll have the information. Or you could ask your teacher to refer your DC to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I probably should have clarified her age. She's 7, almost 8. She qualifies based on her NNAT score.

I'm really looking for additional resources and maybe some other kids her age that are "weird" like her. While she has friends at school, she realizes that she's different and being called weird by the other kids is really starting to get to her. I'd like her to know there are other kids out there like her and I thought this might be a place to start. I'm not looking at it as a badge of honor or anything that I would even tell our friends about but just as a place to find some other kids her age that she can fit in with better academically.

Based on what is said on this board I'm not holding out any hope that APP, should she be accepted, will provide what she seems to need in a classroom setting. Again, thinking this could be a place where she can identify with other kids like her.

MY DS was reading at 3 also. Went through the AAP/GT program and now a junior at TJ. AAP was a big help, and not very hard for him, but still it was a nice group.

Thanks

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thank you for the additional responses.

To the pp who feels she was similar to my DD as a kid I reallay appreicate the support. It's hard to explain her to people if they don't know her. She's not a complete social outcast as she is really outgoing and has friends, but there is just something different and a void it seems she has. She'll state that she knows she's different but doesn't know why. We don't tell her she's smart or show her the test scores, but she just knows she's different and it breaks my heart a little to see her struggling to understand why. While homeschooling is not an option for us I can see how it could be a great option for her. That's why I'm trying to at least find activities outside of school. She uses Khan Academy on her own (I monitor progress) but I was hoping Mensa would be a more interactive activity.

Thanks for the recommednation on the foreign language. Someone told me that Duolingo is a free language learning site but I haven't checked it out yet.

Her NNAT score was 149. We didn't prep her or even tell her about the test.

To pp who stated that there are many gifted kids that are socially skilled, I agree. DD isn't a complete outcast but I know she needs to work on these skills. However, it's hard to watch a teacher be understanding that Johnny still isn't reading well in 2nd grade and provide extra support for him while they just tell me they are frustrated by my DD because she has a messy desk and doesn't want to transition to the next assignment because she wants to keep exploring the previous one. The current teacher states she understands that DD excels intellectually but they can't move her any farther ahead or provide her with any additional resources in 2nd grade, but she can just be frustrating in the classroom. It's not Johnny's fault he can't read well and I don't think it's my DD's fault for absorbing information quickly and wanting to move forward faster and deeper into subjects.

I'm not sure what the answer is but I can't just beat into her that she has to stop talking when the lesson is over and must keep her desk organized when I'm not there. If you think the answer is punishment for these issues in a child like her I can tell you that it doesn't work. She's generally a very rule abiding kid (particularly with safety), but she has a severe stubborn streak in her when it comes to learning/facts/concepts. I don't want to crush her spirit and desire for learning simply because the school can't provide for her academic needs at this time.

I was hoping that finding another outlet for her would help her stop being so "frustrating" to the teacher.

Wh did you say she was barely passing?

I'd like to know this too. I wouldn't care if my kid was testing off the charts. If the schoolwork was suffering, I would be addressing that first before I'd be working on attaining a meaningless label. As your child matures, no one will care what label he/she has, it is the end result that matters. If a child is in special ed but has fabulous grades and is well behaved, do you think that matters (compared to the Mensa kid who is a slob, barely passes, etc.)? I'd refocus my efforts on what I'd be focusing on, but that is just me.

I'm not working on attaining a meaningless label, my goodness.

At this point, I chalk it up to the 1st grade teacher (she's now in 2nd) and DD just not being a good match. I could blame the teacher since she was very disorganized and seemed to have little control over her class and classroom, but I'd rather just consider it a bad match. This teacher went from telling us how surprised she was by how advanced DD was, to how frustrating she was and practically failing 1st grade, back to OMG I think she very gifted all between the beginning of the year and Feb. Her report cards certaintly didn't reflect failing grades (all 4s by the end of the year).

Her current teacher tells us no academic issues only frustratingly unorganized.

[Anonymous]

And yes, NNAT does go to 160.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I probably should have clarified her age. She's 7, almost 8. She qualifies based on her NNAT score.

I'm really looking for additional resources and maybe some other kids her age that are "weird" like her. While she has friends at school, she realizes that she's different and being called weird by the other kids is really starting to get to her. I'd like her to know there are other kids out there like her and I thought this might be a place to start. I'm not looking at it as a badge of honor or anything that I would even tell our friends about but just as a place to find some other kids her age that she can fit in with better academically.

Based on what is said on this board I'm not holding out any hope that APP, should she be accepted, will provide what she seems to need in a classroom setting. Again, thinking this could be a place where she can identify with other kids like her.

Oh my, it was my understanding the AAP center is where the top 2% of FCPS children identify with "weird like them" peers. Hum...maybe FCPS is failing our kids??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thank you for the additional responses.

To the pp who feels she was similar to my DD as a kid I reallay appreicate the support. It's hard to explain her to people if they don't know her. She's not a complete social outcast as she is really outgoing and has friends, but there is just something different and a void it seems she has. She'll state that she knows she's different but doesn't know why. We don't tell her she's smart or show her the test scores, but she just knows she's different and it breaks my heart a little to see her struggling to understand why. While homeschooling is not an option for us I can see how it could be a great option for her. That's why I'm trying to at least find activities outside of school. She uses Khan Academy on her own (I monitor progress) but I was hoping Mensa would be a more interactive activity.

Thanks for the recommednation on the foreign language. Someone told me that Duolingo is a free language learning site but I haven't checked it out yet.

Her NNAT score was 149. We didn't prep her or even tell her about the test.

To pp who stated that there are many gifted kids that are socially skilled, I agree. DD isn't a complete outcast but I know she needs to work on these skills. However, it's hard to watch a teacher be understanding that Johnny still isn't reading well in 2nd grade and provide extra support for him while they just tell me they are frustrated by my DD because she has a messy desk and doesn't want to transition to the next assignment because she wants to keep exploring the previous one.[u] The current teacher states she understands that DD excels intellectually but they can't move her any farther ahead or provide her with any additional resources in 2nd grade, but she can just be frustrating in the classroom. It's not Johnny's fault he can't read well and I don't think it's my DD's fault for absorbing information quickly and wanting to move forward faster and deeper into subjects.

I'm not sure what the answer is but I can't just beat into her that she has to stop talking when the lesson is over and must keep her desk organized when I'm not there. If you think the answer is punishment for these issues in a child like her I can tell you that it doesn't work. She's generally a very rule abiding kid (particularly with safety), but she has a severe stubborn streak in her when it comes to learning/facts/concepts. I don't want to crush her spirit and desire for learning simply because the school can't provide for her academic needs at this time.

I was hoping that finding another outlet for her would help her stop being so "frustrating" to the teacher.

Shouldn't a teacher be frustrated if a child of your child's age isn't easily transitioning to the next task? The teacher is teaching a whole class, not just your child. There is a curriculum and time line in which it must be completed.

No, apparently this child's brilliance should largely excuse behavior that should be curtailed in preschool. Quirky fine. Behavioral issues, okay, can be dealt with. Not listening repeatedly throughout the year when the teacher needs to move on, getting comments like "barely passing" a grade, etc. = not okay. This is a child whom you are excusing for being rude to her teacher because she is 'stubborn'? okayyyyyyyy

Wow, a little harsh, but I don't expect everyone to be understanding.

If I didn't have a child like her I would feel the same way you do. But this is not strictly a behavioral issue. I run a fairly strict home in terms of responsibility and behavior/respect with my kids. I've had several other parents that were in this same position that have told me they regret forcing them to "shut-up and color" when they had teachers that didn't meet them at their academic level and then complained about the resulting behavior. The parents tried to force them to fit the mold and now the kids hate school. I'm worried about that just as much as her behavior and social maturity.

The closest I can come to describing her is like the some of the characters on the Big Bang Theory. While she not quite as clueless about her comments as these characters portray, she's along those lines when engaged in an academic subject. The difference is when I point out that some of her comments can be taken as rude she gets upset and says she didn't know it was rude and wasn't trying to be rude. She thinks about this a lot. I'd want her to learn to be considerate but I don't want her so stressed out that she just shuts down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
The closest I can come to describing her is like the some of the characters on the Big Bang Theory. While she not quite as clueless about her comments as these characters portray, she's along those lines when engaged in an academic subject. The difference is when I point out that some of her comments can be taken as rude she gets upset and says she didn't know it was rude and wasn't trying to be rude. She thinks about this a lot. I'd want her to learn to be considerate but I don't want her so stressed out that she just shuts down.

A great example of why the OP should be seeking out the school counselor.