If this is the way the public education system works, I am already in despair about my choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why don't you get your child evaluated privately if you don't agree with the school. I'm not sure what you are so up in arms about: the report or the fact that your child qualifies for (free) services. No one is forcing you to have an IEP although I'm not sure why you would want to turn something down that is all to benefit your child.

How could I be more clear? They administered a test to my son that is not approved for children his age, and concluded that he is cognitively "below average" compared to his peers. This is bullshit since there is no data set of "peers" to whom he can be compared, since 3yos don't take the test. They have measured him against academic standards that are suited to 4 or 5 year old. Of course he would "fail" that test. Most 3yos would.

I never said I was turning anything down. In fact, I said I agreed with the OT's evaluation. But I can tell you that I will never, ever allow him to be evaluated by this joke of a psychologist ever again. And the fact that the SPED coordinator has trust in this man makes me have ZERO trust in her. I don't need nor do I want to have my child privately evaluated against academic standards. He is perfectly smart. He simply has some sensory and impulsivity issues. Those issues don't make him "cognitively below average." They make make it harder for him to learn, but they don't mean he is cognitively below average. On top of that, the fact that his teacher is insisting that she regularly sees 3yos who can sight read and write their entire name makes me question her and the curriculum standards by which the school is measuring my son. If those are the expectations, then I firmly believe they are unrealistic and not developmentally appropriate.

Well, here you say that teacher "regularly sees" 3 year olds who can write their names & sight read words. In your first post you say "She claims that some 3yos come into the classroom able to write their full name and read sight words, and that all of her kids are expected to be able to do this by the end of the year. So tell me, DCUM, does this ring true? If so, how does this happen? I know I did not write or sight read at age 3 or 4; neither did my husband according to his mother. We are both well-educated and employed professionals, so it's not like we lost out. If you have a kid in DC's public or public charter PS3 do you agree with their academic expectations?"

IDK what the big deal is. My 3 year old came into school last year unable to write at all, and learned to write her name over the course of the year. It wasn't like she was drilled on writing or flashcards, they had the kids practice writing their names by having them "sign in" every day. Some kids in her class were able to write their names when school began, especially the "older" 3 year olds and the kids with 3-4 letter names. Some kids still struggled with writing their names at the end of the year, but all of them showed improvement.

As for sight words, if a kid sees a word often enough s/he will learn to recognize it. STOP or CAT or THE, days of the week, or the names of other kids in their class, for example. It doesn't mean they can "read," it just means they've memorized a certain sequence of letters.

I think it's normal to feel a little defensive when it comes to your kids, but really, it sounds like you may be overreacting to what you heard. Did the teacher actually suggest that you should drill the kid with flashcards every evening, as you mentioned in your first post? Or did you just react to what you heard the teacher say and jump to that as a solution? Because drilling the kid with flashcards seems like a bad idea to me, but if the teacher is just noticing that your child is maybe not quite at the same level of handwriting development as other kids, well, that's something I would want to know.

My child is "below average" where math concepts are concerned. While hearing that wasn't exactly my happiest moment, I am personally glad that the teacher noticed that and told me about it. Now we can both try to work to get her up to the level of her classmates.

Just because your child is "below average"cognitively doesn't mean they are below average intelligence. You shouldn't take it so personally. It's not about something you did or didn't do.

I think you are overreacting.

Perhaps I am. But I expect exactly what you are claiming in bold above by the end of the year. But the hysterical tone of this report - two months into preschool - was a bit much for me. So he's not great at writing - YET - and doesn't really sight read (except for his name) - YET. I don't care. I resented the fact that this report was presented as if I should. There are 5.5 months left in the school year. Talk to me in April if he's not making progress. Until then, your reports aren't worth the paper they were printed on.

[Anonymous]

I do think DCPS has better resources whe it comes to this issue.

[Anonymous]

OP, I can relate. My dd had a TERRIBLE evaluation by one of the region's leading developmental pediatricians. The dr's eval process was so bad it was almost comical, and she came up with a whole host of problems that stunned us and that I knew in my gut were wrong, not because I refused to see problems, but b/c the dr's process was so flawed. I simply could not trust the results. So, I found another dev ped who took the time and effort to figure out what was going on.

In my opinion, giving a 3.5 yr old a test designed for a 4 yr old is just stupid. What the hell were they thinking? Seriously, you need to ask why they decided on that test at that time. Then you need to take a deep breath (I've been where you are and I know it's difficult to make a decision when you are very angry), and figure out if getting private testing or testing with Early Stages is worth it. Take some time first to get over the shock of someone telling you something is seriously wrong with your kid. You have options, too. There are other charters and public schools who have openings. We are at Bridges in Petworth and I cannot say enough wonderful things about their teachers and special needs team. They do a marvelous job of building on the strengths of the kid while also designing a plan to help strengthen the challenges. So, yes, there are schools in the DC public/charter system who get it right. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Thanks, 13:42. I will be attacked and flamed for saying it but at this point I am skeptical of "developmental pediatrics" in general and I will not be subjecting DS to anymore evaluations. We've ruled out physical issues, we're developing an IEP for needed OT, and I've let it be known that I am not comfortable with my son being pressured to perform according to some quantitative standard at age 3. His teacher and I are on the same page at this point. I get that she and the school have a curriculum and that they are tasked to try and keep the kids on track with it. But it is perfectly well known that there are wide variations in development amongst kids this age and I am just done with the stressing about what MIGHT be "wrong" with my child. Neither we nor his teacher are at all worried about his intelligence or academic readiness, so I've let it be known that I want the subject put to rest. I think that the OT will bring him up to speed on many things and we will wait and see how he develops for the rest of the year.

[Anonymous]

So at 3 years old the only kind of label a kid can get is developmentally delayed. And the good thing about that label is that it ages out, within 5 years. So the child will be retested at age 8- or before, to determine what is still needed. As OP said, it would be OT and PT, but no academics.

[Anonymous]

OP,
So sorry to hear what you've gone through. BTDT. It sounds like you got a crap psychologist and that the report wasn't pres ented well. You may be experiencing post-assessment shock. Some educators, public AND private seem to forget that most first time parents do not have a degree in child psychology. Sometimes they assume that if you have any postsecondary degree then you can follow all the jargon and stats thrown around.

For your own sanity, rest assured that this case is not representative of public early childhood education.

Please, please contact Early Stages http://www.earlystagesdc.org/ If for no other reason than to have a second opinion on your child's situation, services, and school options. Their mission is your child's needs. It's a citywide program whether your child is in school or not. It's a huge improvement in early childhood development resources. They don't do academic testing.

For some reason certain "independent" charter schools that don't work with them directly. Maybe yours is one?

Visit the special needs forum on DCUM for flame-free feedback and a snark free space to vent.

In general, document EVERYTHING and participate in every meeting you can. It will make transitions to a new school and new area a little easier.

Again, sorry you had this experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My child is 3.5 and currently enrolled in a charter school for PS3. He has attention, sensory and impulse control issues (like a lot of 3yo's I know) and we are working with him on it. His teacher has been good, too. But I feel like we made a mistake by letting him be evaluated by the school psychologist and now I am questioning their assumptions about what social and academic expectations are age/developmentally appropriate as well as their opinion about how he measures up. He was given age inappropriate tests (approved for 4 years and up, he was 3.5 when they tested him) and after talking with the teacher about our concerns with these tests/reports, I am more lost than ever.

She claims that some 3yos come into the classroom able to write their full name and read sight words, and that all of her kids are expected to be able to do this by the end of the year. So tell me, DCUM, does this ring true? If so, how does this happen? I know I did not write or sight read at age 3 or 4; neither did my husband according to his mother. We are both well-educated and employed professionals, so it's not like we lost out. If you have a kid in DC's public or public charter PS3 do you agree with their academic expectations?

I am not the kind of parent who wants to nor do I philsophically believe it is appropriate to drill my kid on the alphabet, do flashcards, ask him to practice writing letters, etc etc etc, especially in the few hours I get with him every evening. HE'S 3. I want him to play and explore and get dirty and ask questions and use his imagination. All of this has me feeling that he is too young for a formal academic setting, that I've made an enormous mistake by putting him in this situation, and that this country's focus on testing and standards is wrong and damaging to our kids. I feel like my son knows that his behavior is a problem (and we agree, and we are working on it) and that he is not living up to expectations. I know this is damaging his self-esteem. And my heart is breaking because I have serious doubts that he is being measured against a fair and appropriate standard, so I feel like I am just setting him up to fail. I am wracked with guilt today.

All this said, what are my alternatives? His daycare was wonderful but they did not have the resources or training to help address the sensory and impulse issues. I can't afford to quit my job and even if I did, I'm not kidding myself that I have the ability to teach him everything he needs to know myself. So, is this what it's going to be like dealing with the public education system for the next 14-15 years? If so, I will need anxiety meds and Xanax to get myself through. Or I will have to find a way to pay for a private education with which I philosophically agree.

That is insane - those expectations are insane. Look, half the kids in these programs - especially the little boys - are on ADD drugs. They are KIDS. This is setting your child up for a lifetime of hating school. And you're right to recognize his self esteem taking a hit. Good for you for recognizing this. We are doing a waldorf education for the early schools for this reason. You get screwed in dC (see other thread about not being able to get in at K anywhere you'd want to go) but I don't care. We are now figuring out if we need to take on second jobs because we simply can't send him to a school like you describe and so many of them are like it.

I'm so sorry this is happening to you and all the other little children. I'm thankful that parents like you are realizing it's not enough and getting out. They will not fix this until we make them.

[Anonymous]

Not sure if anyone said this but under the law you are entitled to obtain an independent Ed evaluation (IEE) at school expense if you do not agree w the schools evaluation.

[Anonymous]

Waldorf? Seriously?