If this is the way the public education system works, I am already in despair about my choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At the risk of prying, would you be willing to share the school your son attends? We're in the lottery for next year, and our son sounds a lot like yours. I'm already nervous about how he'll be treated, and would like to avoid having him singled our or labeled before it's developmentally appropriate.

Sorry, I can't. I've probably said enough for people who know me to identify me here and I don't want to be that public about this at this stage. All I can tell you is that the school is in Ward 1.

[Anonymous]

I agree with many of the PP's regarding his evaluation.

And reading sight words by 3? That's developmentally inappropriate (Early Childhood Education/Special Education teacher here). There have been studies that show that forcing kids to read too early provides no advantage later and can actually harm later reading development.

Not to hijack the thread, but this might be something for your Charter to look at (and all schools). Finland is the top performing country in the world for education. There's a lot we could learn from their education model. There are no standardized tests, and they don't formally teach reading until 6/7. I think the biggest thing is they are teaching kids to love to learn, not just to take a test.
I found this article fascinating about Finland's approach to education, including those from different countries who move to Finland and need extra help: http://www.smithsonianmag.com/people-places/Why-Are-Finlands-Schools-Successful.html?c=y&page=1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your school's clinical psychologist and/or social worker and or schoo psychologist is there to support your child's emotional and/or cognitive needs. Plenty of 3 year olds without cognitive issues have emotional issues that interfere with their ability to learn. In that case, they wouldn't need an IEP - and working with a mental health professional at the school or on the outside would likely help your child succeed. That's not labeling, that's helping remove barriers to learning.

Well, they have basically rigged this entire process to justify putting an IEP in place. I was also appalled at the meeting we had to discuss the evaluations and whether he qualified for services when this charlatan of a psychologist basically came up with some reason out of thin air to justify it. I am all about "removing barriers to learning." What I am NOT about is using developmentally inappropriate tests to label my child as "below average" cognitive ability, when that is just completely asinine horseshit and everyone including his teacher knows it.

I would take him to a therapist on the outside, get a report, and use that with the school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree with many of the PP's regarding his evaluation.

And reading sight words by 3? That's developmentally inappropriate (Early Childhood Education/Special Education teacher here). There have been studies that show that forcing kids to read too early provides no advantage later and can actually harm later reading development.

Not to hijack the thread, but this might be something for your Charter to look at (and all schools). Finland is the top performing country in the world for education. There's a lot we could learn from their education model. There are no standardized tests, and they don't formally teach reading until 6/7. I think the biggest thing is they are teaching kids to love to learn, not just to take a test.
I found this article fascinating about Finland's approach to education, including those from different countries who move to Finland and need extra help: http://www.smithsonianmag.com/people-places/Why-Are-Finlands-Schools-Successful.html?c=y&page=1

Thanks for your post. Per the title of my thread, I am at a loss about what is best for my child and how I should proceed based on the choices I have. I am trying for a second child and can't really afford two daycare tuitions or a private full-day preschool tuition, although at this point I am more concerned about my son than I am about some future baby. So tell me, what would do and what kind of educational situation would you seek out for your child if you were in my shoes? Because trust me, my biggest fear is that this experience is going to set my son up to hate school. I can tell he is already ambivalent about it, and I know I sure as hell am.

[Anonymous]

Why don't you get your child evaluated privately if you don't agree with the school. I'm not sure what you are so up in arms about: the report or the fact that your child qualifies for (free) services. No one is forcing you to have an IEP although I'm not sure why you would want to turn something down that is all to benefit your child.

[Anonymous]

I think you need to take a deep breath and ask yourself why this has upset you so much. I posted on the other thread that you responded to telling another parent not to allow her child to be evaluated. My child has an IEP. He has not been labeled as defective. He gets extra services that would be very expensive and difficult to access outside of the school setting. I have seen how those services have helped my son and appreciate that his teacher brought her concerns to my attention when he was just a little three year old.

The bit about the sight words and the writing their own name in PreK is definitely not a normal development step from what I have seen, but having an IEP doesn't harm your child, and I'm just not sure why you are so angry. I believe that you can just decline services. I'm not sure about that, because it never would have occurred to me to do so.

The reason I'm responding to your post is because I fear that you are making a huge sweeping statement that NO parent should ever allow the school to evaluate their child for possible barriers to learning, and your cautioning another parent on another message confirms that.

[Anonymous]

With respect, I think this might be more about your reaction than your kid. You mention measurement fatigue and not agreeing with the types of measures used to "classify" your child. I think you should let the school know that you are not interested in testing, you think your kid does not need certain extra things, and that you want the focus for your child to be on getting a positive attitude to school (not academics). That is much more important at this stage.

I wouldn't rush into moving to another school because you may just get annoyed with their methods, or something else.

By the way - how does your DS get along with the teacher? I read that, for boys in particular, their relationship with their teacher is extremely important. I have seen it with my 5yo DS. If he doesn't respect the teacher, his behavior is bad. Once he has respect for the teacher, he is a model child. He had a teacher at age 3 that he did not click with at all and he pretty much wasted that year. At 4 and 5, he started the years badly but something clicked after a couple of months and he suddenly paid a lot of attention to the teacher. Same kid, totally different behavior and effort.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why don't you get your child evaluated privately if you don't agree with the school. I'm not sure what you are so up in arms about: the report or the fact that your child qualifies for (free) services. No one is forcing you to have an IEP although I'm not sure why you would want to turn something down that is all to benefit your child.

How could I be more clear? They administered a test to my son that is not approved for children his age, and concluded that he is cognitively "below average" compared to his peers. This is bullshit since there is no data set of "peers" to whom he can be compared, since 3yos don't take the test. They have measured him against academic standards that are suited to 4 or 5 year old. Of course he would "fail" that test. Most 3yos would.

I never said I was turning anything down. In fact, I said I agreed with the OT's evaluation. But I can tell you that I will never, ever allow him to be evaluated by this joke of a psychologist ever again. And the fact that the SPED coordinator has trust in this man makes me have ZERO trust in her. I don't need nor do I want to have my child privately evaluated against academic standards. He is perfectly smart. He simply has some sensory and impulsivity issues. Those issues don't make him "cognitively below average." They make make it harder for him to learn, but they don't mean he is cognitively below average. On top of that, the fact that his teacher is insisting that she regularly sees 3yos who can sight read and write their entire name makes me question her and the curriculum standards by which the school is measuring my son. If those are the expectations, then I firmly believe they are unrealistic and not developmentally appropriate.

[Anonymous]

Go for a good Montessori School. If you are not familiar with the philosophy behind it, search for it. You will see why it is so great with young kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With respect, I think this might be more about your reaction than your kid. You mention measurement fatigue and not agreeing with the types of measures used to "classify" your child. I think you should let the school know that you are not interested in testing, you think your kid does not need certain extra things, and that you want the focus for your child to be on getting a positive attitude to school (not academics). That is much more important at this stage.

I wouldn't rush into moving to another school because you may just get annoyed with their methods, or something else.

By the way - how does your DS get along with the teacher? I read that, for boys in particular, their relationship with their teacher is extremely important. I have seen it with my 5yo DS. If he doesn't respect the teacher, his behavior is bad. Once he has respect for the teacher, he is a model child. He had a teacher at age 3 that he did not click with at all and he pretty much wasted that year. At 4 and 5, he started the years badly but something clicked after a couple of months and he suddenly paid a lot of attention to the teacher. Same kid, totally different behavior and effort.

He has a great relationship with is teacher. Until today, I had a lot of faith in her. But again, the fact that she insisted that she regularly sees 3yos who come into her classroom knowing how to write their full name and sight read has shaken that faith pretty hard and makes me question the curriculum that she is being asked to teach as well as her personal expectations/beliefs about what is developmentally appropriate. If this is what public preschool is, I'm fairly sure I might want to opt out until K.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go for a good Montessori School. If you are not familiar with the philosophy behind it, search for it. You will see why it is so great with young kids.

I would very much like to explore Montessori, but my DH insists that it is the wrong environment for our son. I just have to wholeheartedly disagree, but there's not much I can do if DH is opposed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree with many of the PP's regarding his evaluation.

And reading sight words by 3? That's developmentally inappropriate (Early Childhood Education/Special Education teacher here). There have been studies that show that forcing kids to read too early provides no advantage later and can actually harm later reading development.

Not to hijack the thread, but this might be something for your Charter to look at (and all schools). Finland is the top performing country in the world for education. There's a lot we could learn from their education model. There are no standardized tests, and they don't formally teach reading until 6/7. I think the biggest thing is they are teaching kids to love to learn, not just to take a test.
I found this article fascinating about Finland's approach to education, including those from different countries who move to Finland and need extra help: http://www.smithsonianmag.com/people-places/Why-Are-Finlands-Schools-Successful.html?c=y&page=1

Thanks for your post. Per the title of my thread, I am at a loss about what is best for my child and how I should proceed based on the choices I have. I am trying for a second child and can't really afford two daycare tuitions or a private full-day preschool tuition, although at this point I am more concerned about my son than I am about some future baby. So tell me, what would do and what kind of educational situation would you seek out for your child if you were in my shoes? Because trust me, my biggest fear is that this experience is going to set my son up to hate school. I can tell he is already ambivalent about it, and I know I sure as hell am.

PP here. I know it's hard, and I'm sorry. It's possible that the 4s will be easier on him depending on the teachers.

I think part of it is finding a school that is a good fit. Some schools (and individual teachers) are great at fostering healthy social/emotional development and learning. Are there other charters that you can look into? Or an affordable more laid back preschool he can do for now that would be willing to take into his IEP but also have a more developmentally appropriate program? Play-based preschools can be great.

Also do some things at home. Read books together, go to DC to see some the museums (the American History museum has a cool exhibit on the first floor with old trains, cars, and the Air and Space museum in DC has a neat hands-on room). You can do this now and as he gets older too, have him find the letters in his name on cereal boxes while grocery shopping, count items and put them in your cart, etc. Just simple real-world things that will show him that things learned in school are everywhere.

Having a sensory table at home is fun too (and to minimize the mess if you have a yard you can put it outside). Not sure if he has one at school. You can put in oatmeal, cornstarch, cornstarch and water (makes a fun goop), rice etc. You can hide magnetic letters, numbers in the table or have sorting buckets labeled so he can find and sort objects.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go for a good Montessori School. If you are not familiar with the philosophy behind it, search for it. You will see why it is so great with young kids.

I would very much like to explore Montessori, but my DH insists that it is the wrong environment for our son. I just have to wholeheartedly disagree, but there's not much I can do if DH is opposed.

I'm the PP who asked about the relationship with the teacher. DS did Montessori for 2 years and it was totally the wrong environment for him. It was a waste of money and time for our child.

Is the issue that you think the teacher is working on reading with all the kids, rather than just the kids that are ready for it? How is she doing that? If it's gentle, fun activities, I think you should have no problem with it. If it's stressful for the kid, then I'd ask the teacher to lay off that for a while and help the kid get some confidence or fun at school or whatever you think is missing.

[Anonymous]

OP, PLEASE don't assume that all public education is like this. It's not. Yes, there's testing, but not individual evaluations against an inappropriate standard.

For PK, maybe look into a DCPS with Head Start for All. (You say you're near Barnard but not IB--if Powell is one of your IB options, it might be a good bet for next year.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why don't you get your child evaluated privately if you don't agree with the school. I'm not sure what you are so up in arms about: the report or the fact that your child qualifies for (free) services. No one is forcing you to have an IEP although I'm not sure why you would want to turn something down that is all to benefit your child.

How could I be more clear? They administered a test to my son that is not approved for children his age, and concluded that he is cognitively "below average" compared to his peers. This is bullshit since there is no data set of "peers" to whom he can be compared, since 3yos don't take the test. They have measured him against academic standards that are suited to 4 or 5 year old. Of course he would "fail" that test. Most 3yos would.

I never said I was turning anything down. In fact, I said I agreed with the OT's evaluation. But I can tell you that I will never, ever allow him to be evaluated by this joke of a psychologist ever again. And the fact that the SPED coordinator has trust in this man makes me have ZERO trust in her. I don't need nor do I want to have my child privately evaluated against academic standards. He is perfectly smart. He simply has some sensory and impulsivity issues. Those issues don't make him "cognitively below average." They make make it harder for him to learn, but they don't mean he is cognitively below average. On top of that, the fact that his teacher is insisting that she regularly sees 3yos who can sight read and write their entire name makes me question her and the curriculum standards by which the school is measuring my son. If those are the expectations, then I firmly believe they are unrealistic and not developmentally appropriate.

Change schools - you don't trust them and it's an obvious bad "fit".

Get your kid evaluated privately by a developmental pediatrician.