SAHM re-entry into the workforce

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a WOHM who doesn't think a SAHM is a good choice for my workplace. I admit it. Our outlooks are just too different.

And your job is what? And it requires your colleagues to have your same "outlook"?

I've been home for one year and, in that time, have directed over $1.8 million in business to my husband's law firm. And taken care of two kids. And my dad. And have had two previous employers ask me to come back whenever I'm ready. I think my "outlook" is just fine.

Your "outlook" is irrelevant because you're a SAHM. Are you ready to go back to 50+ hours in an office, with travel?

You are the one who made assumptions about my "outlook," which you now claim is "irrelevant" because I'm currently a SAHM.

When I am ready to return to work, which will be in about 18 months, we will have FT childcare (a nanny we already know and who has worked with us) employed for after school and some weekend time for two elementary school kids. We won't use all of that time, but it will give us the flexibility we want. My husband will also be working fewer hours than he is now, and will be able to do more of the day-to-day family activities (including driving kids to school in the morning, which he can't do now). Returning to travel wouldn't be too much of a problem as it's what I'm used to (including significant travel until our second child was 3), and I'm sure that being at home with kids for almost three years won't have erased my ability to navigate National, manage a team, set priorities and perform my job well. Maybe that's why I keep being asked to go back.

Will I take a 50+ hour per week job? One with significant travel? One with fewer hours? One with an unpredictable or regular schedule? Well, that depends on what the position is, the mission of the organization, how much less my husband is working (which for him in part depends on what kind of job I want) and how my parents are. Pretty much the same factors that went into my decision-making when I was a WOHM considering promotions and positions at a new organizations.

Do you really think that WOHMs have the corner on the market on being hard-working, organized and productive women? That nobody else could possible have a plan, and a way to implement it, that's different from yours but that also involves meeting commitments to work, including intense schedules and travel? That other families are unable to make decisions that allow for each spouse to have a fulfilling career, and to plan accordingly in a way that reflects thoughtfulness rather than flakiness?

They might not but what WOHM's have cornered the market on is a track record something as a SAHM you can't offer to an employee. In theroy, all the planning in the world is great but I don't care what you can say you can plan, what I want to know is that you can plan, implement and execute.

[Anonymous]

PP here. Guess I'm pretty lucky that you aren't the one I need to prove myself to. My work record speaks volumes about my ability to perform well and meet commitments, and I've had no problem having folks reach out to offer me senior positions.

Do you realize that many employers, at least for certain levels and certain roles, are looking for people who are simply smart, agile, competent colleagues who can provide adult supervision and leadership for their departments/teams? I logged in my hours long ago (though I may again by choice), and the people who matter in hiring decisions look at what I've accomplished as a group leader, not at whether I've been home with kids for a few years. I know because they keep calling.

I may well be wrong, but I'd guess you're in your mid-to-late thirties. I'm a bit older so that might explain part of the difference in perspective. I've seen friends go back into the workforce successfully, and I've seen people work through the time their kids are mid-elementary school and then stay home or go PT.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP here. Guess I'm pretty lucky that you aren't the one I need to prove myself to. My work record speaks volumes about my ability to perform well and meet commitments, and I've had no problem having folks reach out to offer me senior positions.

Do you realize that many employers, at least for certain levels and certain roles, are looking for people who are simply smart, agile, competent colleagues who can provide adult supervision and leadership for their departments/teams? I logged in my hours long ago (though I may again by choice), and the people who matter in hiring decisions look at what I've accomplished as a group leader, not at whether I've been home with kids for a few years. I know because they keep calling.

I may well be wrong, but I'd guess you're in your mid-to-late thirties. I'm a bit older so that might explain part of the difference in perspective. I've seen friends go back into the workforce successfully, and I've seen people work through the time their kids are mid-elementary school and then stay home or go PT.

Not that poster, but you obviously do have something to prove. You made your point early on in the discussion, which people said was valid, but your tone and thinly-veiled hatred for SAHMs is gross. I'm glad to hear that other WOHM's have hired women who have gaps in their resume. They obviously feel confident about their choices and understand that one size doesn't fit all. Most important, this doesn't threaten them. It sounds like you are stuck in the past: a woman acting like a man just to get ahead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
OMG, your thinking is so antiquated!
Now a days, working women have husbands who also shoulder the domestic duties. My DH does as much (and sometimes more) than I do. Additionally, MANY women stay in the work force, especially educated ones with earning potential.

Grandma, this is 2011, not 1981. Wake up.

Wow! How catty can people be? I really didn't think the woman you called "Grandma" was trying to be anything but helpful. How did her post push such a hot button?

[Anonymous]

Have to love the war between SAHM's and WOHM's...The person that wrote "OMG...your thinking is so antiquated, then "wake up Grandma" is showing her true colors of rudeness and she probably enjoys reality TV too. (Have to love how minds are being manipulated through the boob tube...oh wait;that saying is antiquated; you might have to google it youngling.) You are probably rude to your parents too.

"Some" of the younger generation seem to have a tendency towards rudeness to make their points. Sort of like name calling at the playground...not too mature.

I am a SAHM that is a WAHM. Left a 75 hour a week high commission sales job to be at home with my babies. Saved so I could do this. Now I am self-employed. Recently, I decided to start interviewing for practice. Reputable, larger companies will have HR departments that will not ask you questions about how are you going to manage your time when you have kids? Lawsuit. If you have an interview, they are interested whether you are 21 or 41. A 21 year old can get pregnant, stay out late at night drinking etc; a 41 year old might have elderly parents to take care of and children. We aren't robots. We all have lives. How we balance them makes us different.

Kudos to the woman who started this website. Found you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have to love the war between SAHM's and WOHM's...The person that wrote "OMG...your thinking is so antiquated, then "wake up Grandma" is showing her true colors of rudeness and she probably enjoys reality TV too. (Have to love how minds are being manipulated through the boob tube...oh wait;that saying is antiquated; you might have to google it youngling.) You are probably rude to your parents too.

"Some" of the younger generation seem to have a tendency towards rudeness to make their points. Sort of like name calling at the playground...not too mature.

I am a SAHM that is a WAHM. Left a 75 hour a week high commission sales job to be at home with my babies. Saved so I could do this. Now I am self-employed. Recently, I decided to start interviewing for practice. Reputable, larger companies will have HR departments that will not ask you questions about how are you going to manage your time when you have kids? Lawsuit. If you have an interview, they are interested whether you are 21 or 41. A 21 year old can get pregnant, stay out late at night drinking etc; a 41 year old might have elderly parents to take care of and children. We aren't robots. We all have lives. How we balance them makes us different.

Kudos to the woman who started this website. Found you.

To quote the bolded statement, "Reputable, larger companies will have HR departments that will not ask you questions about how are you going to manage your time when you have kids? Lawsuit." That is the problem though. If they could ask this question maybe people would have the chance to answer. But the problem is they can't ask the question, they can't find out how, so they may dismiss you because they have a stack of resumes they don't have to wonder about or at least wonder about so obviously.

Not saying it's right, it's not. And it's not forward thinking on the part of the company either because I personally think they are missing out on a pool of qualified women, and I'm very pro women in the workforce, whether they have kids or not, whether they've taken off time to be a SAHM or not. But it can be reality. And saying just because they can't ask it doesn't mean it's a problem does not mean they don't base decisions on the unanawered quetions.

[Anonymous]

Wow, this thread is depressing. I'm a SAHM of 10 years who just began trying to re-enter the workforce about 6 weeks ago. I don't have to go back to work, but I WANT to go back to work. My kids are 7 and 10, and my husband works from home most days. I'm trying to break back into the paralegal field (I have 4 years of prior experience), and have applied for, no lie, about 30 positions in the past 6 weeks. I haven't gotten one single call-back! I'm even applying for entry-level and temp positions, and I usually meet or surpass all of the educational and work experience requirements in the postings. But I haven't received one single call. What can I do to let these staffing companies know that I am committed, hard-working, and dependable? Should I be explaining the gap in time on my resume or cover letter or not? I have been, but maybe I should take it out?
I'm on LinkedIn, I've taken online legal research tutorials to update my legal research skills, and I've done tons of volunteer work (though not in the paralegal field). What more can I do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, this thread is depressing. I'm a SAHM of 10 years who just began trying to re-enter the workforce about 6 weeks ago. I don't have to go back to work, but I WANT to go back to work. My kids are 7 and 10, and my husband works from home most days. I'm trying to break back into the paralegal field (I have 4 years of prior experience), and have applied for, no lie, about 30 positions in the past 6 weeks. I haven't gotten one single call-back! I'm even applying for entry-level and temp positions, and I usually meet or surpass all of the educational and work experience requirements in the postings. But I haven't received one single call. What can I do to let these staffing companies know that I am committed, hard-working, and dependable? Should I be explaining the gap in time on my resume or cover letter or not? I have been, but maybe I should take it out?
I'm on LinkedIn, I've taken online legal research tutorials to update my legal research skills, and I've done tons of volunteer work (though not in the paralegal field). What more can I do?

We are not in the best economy for job-searching as I'm sure you know. 6 weeks is not that long even for someone who has been in the workforce the last 10 years. Keep doing what you are doing and the only other advice is to network. Maybe consider a headhunter if that is available in your field.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, this thread is depressing. I'm a SAHM of 10 years who just began trying to re-enter the workforce about 6 weeks ago. I don't have to go back to work, but I WANT to go back to work. My kids are 7 and 10, and my husband works from home most days. I'm trying to break back into the paralegal field (I have 4 years of prior experience), and have applied for, no lie, about 30 positions in the past 6 weeks. I haven't gotten one single call-back! I'm even applying for entry-level and temp positions, and I usually meet or surpass all of the educational and work experience requirements in the postings. But I haven't received one single call. What can I do to let these staffing companies know that I am committed, hard-working, and dependable? Should I be explaining the gap in time on my resume or cover letter or not? I have been, but maybe I should take it out?
I'm on LinkedIn, I've taken online legal research tutorials to update my legal research skills, and I've done tons of volunteer work (though not in the paralegal field). What more can I do?

In addition to the increased competition in the legal market -- there are lawyers out there taking paralegal jobs -- you probably also know that, if you were a litigation paralegal, the work (and the world) of litigation has changed substantially as law firms have become increasingly reliant on technology for document management, administration, case management, and trial preparation. It might be worth your time, if this is your field, to not just take legal research tutorials online, but to actually go and get substantive training on some of these programs. That would be value added for future employers. Best of luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have to admit that no one cares if you stayed home b/c you had a sick child or you cared for your now dead father. It's not relevant to the work force. Employers want to see people with updated skills who are task-oriented.

Furthermore, there are plenty of women who work and still care for a SN child and ailing parents. I am one of them. While it's not easy, I've learned how to keep things in perspective. I do know that w/o my salary, my children would not be in private school, which is especially important for my son.

So, sadly, while I understand the pressure of family issues, employers who NEED to run an efficient office don't care. fact of life
quote]

Here's another fact of life. Forward-thinking employers recognize the need for work/life balance, and the ones that want to attract the most experienced applicants have policies that provide flexiliby to working parents. The recession makes these policies less necessary to the recruitment process, but that is temporary. The pendulum will swing again.

I returned to the work force out of necessity after a few years off, and am kicking ass. Once I proved my worth (took about a year), I walked into my boss's office and said, 'OK, now you see what I can do. Want to keep me?" I now have flex hours so that I don't have to choose between my child's needs and my boss's. Win-win all around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have to admit that no one cares if you stayed home b/c you had a sick child or you cared for your now dead father. It's not relevant to the work force. Employers want to see people with updated skills who are task-oriented.

Furthermore, there are plenty of women who work and still care for a SN child and ailing parents. I am one of them. While it's not easy, I've learned how to keep things in perspective. I do know that w/o my salary, my children would not be in private school, which is especially important for my son.

So, sadly, while I understand the pressure of family issues, employers who NEED to run an efficient office don't care. fact of life
quote]

Here's another fact of life. Forward-thinking employers recognize the need for work/life balance, and the ones that want to attract the most experienced applicants have policies that provide flexiliby to working parents. The recession makes these policies less necessary to the recruitment process, but that is temporary. The pendulum will swing again.

I returned to the work force out of necessity after a few years off, and am kicking ass. Once I proved my worth (took about a year), I walked into my boss's office and said, 'OK, now you see what I can do. Want to keep me?" I now have flex hours so that I don't have to choose between my child's needs and my boss's. Win-win all around.

Ironically though, if the pendulum does swing toward more family friendly workplaces, it will serve to keep MORE women in the workforce and produce fewer SAHMS. Employers don't typically have family friendly workplaces to attract people who have been out of the workforce for years - they do it to retain employees and keep them from leaving. I work for one of the most family friendly companies in the country and through things like paid maternity and paternity leave, onsite topnotch daycare, free back up childcare, and excellent benefits including flex time, part time options, and telecommuting, the point is that many women don't leave once they have kids.

So I see your point, and I am very much for companies hiring SAHMS who are ready to return, but these forward thinking policies aren't so women can take years and years off, they are to retain women (though extended maternity leaves would allow women to stay home longer, without quitting).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, this thread is depressing. I'm a SAHM of 10 years who just began trying to re-enter the workforce about 6 weeks ago. I don't have to go back to work, but I WANT to go back to work. My kids are 7 and 10, and my husband works from home most days. I'm trying to break back into the paralegal field (I have 4 years of prior experience), and have applied for, no lie, about 30 positions in the past 6 weeks. I haven't gotten one single call-back! I'm even applying for entry-level and temp positions, and I usually meet or surpass all of the educational and work experience requirements in the postings. But I haven't received one single call. What can I do to let these staffing companies know that I am committed, hard-working, and dependable? Should I be explaining the gap in time on my resume or cover letter or not? I have been, but maybe I should take it out?
I'm on LinkedIn, I've taken online legal research tutorials to update my legal research skills, and I've done tons of volunteer work (though not in the paralegal field). What more can I do?

What I find shocking,is you find this situation shocking. It shows just how far removed you are. 4 years is not a lot of experience. You are probably better off going to a local retail establishment and getting a job just to get something on your resume.

[Anonymous]

In general, one returning to the workforce shoudl expect a lower salary. Women who took any time at all out will on average return to the workforce at 81% of their previous salary and for 3+ years out, the figure is 64% of their previous salary (Hewlett et al., Harvard Business Review, 2005). That's an average across all fields. In some fields, it's hard to break back in at all (In the sciences, skills that are 5 years out of date are almost worthless).

I second the volunteer suggestion, but people are correct that the PTA isn't the way to go. There are TONS of non-profits in this area, many of who are dying for people with marketing, IT, legal, or development skills. If you volunteer to work for them for free, they won't say no. Once you get a few projects completed, you resume will look better, and you'll have a few contacts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, this thread is depressing. I'm a SAHM of 10 years who just began trying to re-enter the workforce about 6 weeks ago. I don't have to go back to work, but I WANT to go back to work. My kids are 7 and 10, and my husband works from home most days. I'm trying to break back into the paralegal field (I have 4 years of prior experience), and have applied for, no lie, about 30 positions in the past 6 weeks. I haven't gotten one single call-back! I'm even applying for entry-level and temp positions, and I usually meet or surpass all of the educational and work experience requirements in the postings. But I haven't received one single call. What can I do to let these staffing companies know that I am committed, hard-working, and dependable? Should I be explaining the gap in time on my resume or cover letter or not? I have been, but maybe I should take it out?
I'm on LinkedIn, I've taken online legal research tutorials to update my legal research skills, and I've done tons of volunteer work (though not in the paralegal field). What more can I do?

4 years of experience?

Please tell me paralegal work is your SECOND career?

I stepped out for 2 years after spending 15 years at my second-career job. I easily stepped back in, too, b/c I stayed in contact with my boss, kept up with my certification, and took on consulting work.

Now I'm working PT, and I love it.

Have you taken courses lately? I'm sure EVERY profession changes over 10 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
OMG, your thinking is so antiquated!
Now a days, working women have husbands who also shoulder the domestic duties. My DH does as much (and sometimes more) than I do. Additionally, MANY women stay in the work force, especially educated ones with earning potential.

Grandma, this is 2011, not 1981. Wake up.

Wow! How catty can people be? I really didn't think the woman you called "Grandma" was trying to be anything but helpful. How did her post push such a hot button?

Exactly, I'm a new poster here, and the person calling "Grandma" is rude and immature. Perhaps she's having trouble in her career (I bet she is) and needs to lash out. To the poster she's referring to - just ignore her.
Your advice was just fine.