Please don't be offended- What should your HHI be around to consider sending DC to private school?

[Anonymous]

21:14: I posted at 17:41. Mortgage is about $3k. We paid down a lot of principal before DC #3 started school. Our house is comfortable but not large.

[Anonymous]

I would say either super low (under $100K) so you get financial aid, or over $300K.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hope y'all don't find this question too offensive but we are debating about sending our child to private school. DH thinks its a waste of money and that we maybe biting off more than we can chew so to speak. But I am curious to know how much parents who send their children to pvt school make per year. We live in NW DC and we are looking at a number of schools in our area. Also, what helped you decide if private school or public school was the right fit for your child.

I have three basic rules for sending my kids to private school.

1. Can I afford it? No, I do not mean did I find an extra $60K in the sock drawer last week. If I can realistically fit it in my budget without doing something draconian or stupid, then I consider whether it is worth it.
2. Are there benefits I think my kids can get from going to private school? In my case, my first child is very shy and does a lot better in a small class. My DH did not think we could send one and not the other, so number two is going private, too. (I know many parents make a different choice on that, and I don't know whether I agree with him or not, but it was not worth the argument.)
3. Assuming I can afford it and see a benefit to it, is there a school I think is right for my child/children, and am I truly happy to write that tuition check (and not just be glad to pay something - anything - to not send them to a DC public)? So often, I think DC parents get caught up in the can't-do-public trap. There are plenty of other options, such as moving. People say things like, "Well, that is so expensive and not always realistic." Believe me, putting two kids through private school from K-12 isn't exactly a rounding error on anyone's finances.

We were able to answer all of those questions yes. That doesn't mean that I do not occasionally freak out when I look at all the cash that goes out of our house for tuition, after school nanny, various extracurriculars, my husband's crazy insistence on eating only organic food, etc., but the truth is we could cut a lot of fat, too.

There is no magic number that means you are or or not a private school family. If we had not found the right school, we would not be doing it. I would take a hard look at your budget to see how easily you could swing it. I think your bigger challenge, though, may be getting buy-in from your DH. In my case, the kids are at a school that my DH first screened. He was a joint partner in lookng at the schools and ruling some in and some out. If your DH is gong to think it's a waste no matter what, I might explore other options. You both should be on board with it. It is a lot of money no matter how you slice it, so it has to be money you both want to spend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why did you think we were talking about DC? If you're in DC, private school is a necessity.

Not PP, but probably because this is DC Urban Moms. Fairfax is neither DC nor urban. Moreover, if you are in DC, you have other options than just sending a kid to private school (i.e., there are some decent publics, charters, moving...). Have a nice commute!

And if you two did any reading, you would know that residents of Fairfax make up a huge portion of who posts and reads DCUMs. What the hell? Are you guys always such bitches?

Fairfax County doesn't exist for many on DCUM. Tysons has more non-government office space than DC yet everyone is supposed to live in NW and drive to Tysons or the high tech companies in the Reston area? Potomac MD and Mclean VA are rural with old cars, rusted appliances, and chickens in the yard. Uncle Bud is out back slaughtering some hogs and making sausage in a steel drum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:


Fairfax County doesn't exist for many on DCUM. Tysons has more non-government office space than DC yet everyone is supposed to live in NW and drive to Tysons or the high tech companies in the Reston area? Potomac MD and Mclean VA are rural with old cars, rusted appliances, and chickens in the yard. Uncle Bud is out back slaughtering some hogs and making sausage in a steel drum.

Wow - don't you have better things to do with your time?

People who make statements like this strike me as being insecure in their own lives and respond by focusing outward to judge others. Either that or they are just mean spirited.

[Anonymous]

Fairfax County doesn't exist for many on DCUM. Tysons has more non-government office space than DC yet everyone is supposed to live in NW and drive to Tysons or the high tech companies in the Reston area?

Yes! That's exactly what DH has been doing on/off for more than 10 years. Because living in Virginia just isn't an option for us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Fairfax County doesn't exist for many on DCUM. Tysons has more non-government office space than DC yet everyone is supposed to live in NW and drive to Tysons or the high tech companies in the Reston area?

Yes! That's exactly what DH has been doing on/off for more than 10 years. Because living in Virginia just isn't an option for us.

Well that is plain ridiculous. If you can't find a place in McLean or Vienna to suit your needs then you are just too special.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:


Fairfax County doesn't exist for many on DCUM. Tysons has more non-government office space than DC yet everyone is supposed to live in NW and drive to Tysons or the high tech companies in the Reston area? Potomac MD and Mclean VA are rural with old cars, rusted appliances, and chickens in the yard. Uncle Bud is out back slaughtering some hogs and making sausage in a steel drum.

Wow - don't you have better things to do with your time?

People who make statements like this strike me as being insecure in their own lives and respond by focusing outward to judge others. Either that or they are just mean spirited.

I'm not insecure just sick of the slurs if a family doesn't live in DC. I live in VA.

[Anonymous]

For $30,000 per year, you better hope so! LOL!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hardly jealous. I have a 5,000 sq ft house and a 5 minute commute with best schools in nation for my kids.

Not everyone works in DC. Lots of cash outside the beltway.

Best schools? I bet the top 10 DC privates are better than any public in the burbs.

[Anonymous]

I'd really love it if you nasty city vs burbs people would shut up an allow this thread to stay on topic.

[Anonymous]

One last shot in the DC vs. 'burbs wars. I lived in NW DC for almost fifteen years (started out in Dupont Circle and moved to Woodley Park). We had a beautiful house in a fabulous location, but had to move because dh absolutely refused to live in the District one moment longer. Paying a premium in taxes for a completely incompetent city government was the last straw. First of all, the poster who claimed that real estate prices are "appreciably higher" than other locations around the DC area has obviously not priced real estate anywhere else lately. Herndon? yes. Old Town Alexandria, or North Arlington? No. Furthermore, most parts of NW DC are really quite suburban in character. It's not bad, but it's definitely not "urban." Last, but not least, my commute downtown is shorter now that I live in Virginia. Take it from someone who used to be in this category -- the only reason people stay in DC is because they don't know any better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Back to the OP's question: DC dwellers, HHI $450K, 2 working parents, 3 kids, no FA, @$90k tuition (ouch).

We are in similar boat. We are a 5 minutes across the line. slightly less tuition with mix of schools, no FA and don't forget annual giving. Fortunately bought a great house before boom and paid off huge chunks before kids started school, refinanced. still it is a big Ouch!

Also agree with other PP - its the summer time that is challenging with mix of schools so would not compare daycare to private school tuition directly. Summers are very long in private schools too. fortunately have jobs that have some flex so can be with kids a lot in summer and not straight camps

good luck

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I always find it funny when suburbanites jump on these forums and try to make fun of DC. In my DC neighborhood, I've never heard of any crime, things work as expected, I jog with Senators and some of the most influential people in the nation. You know you would live here if you could afford it. Maybe that soul sucking commute from Vienna on 66 is what is making some of these ladies so bitchy. Also your 1990s stereotypes have about as much sting dead bee.

That sounds nice, but I doubt it could really be called the "city." You essentially live in suburbs within the District limit. Not mocking it -- I do wish I could afford it -- but it's not really "urban" any more than Arlington. (by the way, I'm a NP who is trying to understand what the city v. suburb debate has to do with the price of private school and the HHI one needs to afford them).

[Anonymous]

HHI ranges from $300k-350k depending on DH's bonus. Our mortgage is $4700. We live in NW DC and are zoned for what's considered one of DC's best public elementary schools. While some people love the school and sing its praises, we know plenty of people who send or have sent their kids there and admit the school is okay at best. There is no way we can afford $60,000/year to send two kids to privates without jeopardizing our financial security, so we'll be moving to MoCo in a couple of years when our oldest reaches school-age. DH is a die-hard Washingtonian and I never thought he'd leave, but even he's ready to leave behind the city politics, un-drinkable water and sub-par schools.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous]I am a single parent with HHI about 110K( no child support) and a mortgage, we live in DC so Private or move were our only options( no, we didn't make the lottery at Cap City or El Haines)So, I work 2-3 jobs,live on PB and we get FA. I gave up every single item from my personal budget. Best money I have ever spent and I wouldn't change a thing.[/quote]

Also a single parent with similar income here, also in DC -- we are in-bounds for an ok-but-not-great elementary school and I am weighing various options for my soon-to-be-Pre-Ker. The most viable -- outside of moving, and if I'm going to move, I think it will more likely be out of the DC area altogether -- seems to be public school to third grade, and then private. The more aspirational would be winning the lottery for a good charter school. I think this spring I will be playing the PK/OOB lottery (didn't get into our in-bounds school for PS), the charter school lotteries AND applying to a couple of privates that do a major intake at PK, and seeing what options, if any, fall out at the end.

We've gotten by on my $110K income supplemented by writing and speaking gig honorarium, which has made all the difference with daycare costs. But I worry that I can't pull it off with costs for after care, summers, etc.