Is the obsession with private schools justified?

[Anonymous]

There’s an Atlantic article out on this topic now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, I want my kid to attend the best possible school. So far, so good. But my experience in DC has felt a bit off compared to my experience overseas: paying $40,000 for childcare at NCRC partly to get access to top private schools, hiring consultants to prepare children for admissions, dealing with opaque selection processes that seem influenced by connections, and seeing schools treated as symbols of social status.

And then, when you finally get into a top private school, you realize that the college admissions numbers may be distorted by athletes and legacy admissions, and that the actual curriculum is not necessarily stronger than what good public schools offer. So at some point you have to ask: is it really worth obsessing over something that may offer such poor value?

You need to calm the f$ck down. And I'm trying to say this kindly. You've got your panties in a twist about something that isn't a thing.

Doesn’t sound like you are calm right now ….

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There’s an Atlantic article out on this topic now.

Can you share the link?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People obsess over private schools for the same reason they obsess over travel sports — they’re trying to compensate for their own failures and projecting on to their kids. And wasting a ton of time and money in the process.

They’d be better off paying for a therapist.

Possibly true. But in that spirit I wonder what people who spend too much time on dcum are trying to compensate for?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, I want my kid to attend the best possible school. So far, so good. But my experience in DC has felt a bit off compared to my experience overseas: paying $40,000 for childcare at NCRC partly to get access to top private schools, hiring consultants to prepare children for admissions, dealing with opaque selection processes that seem influenced by connections, and seeing schools treated as symbols of social status.

And then, when you finally get into a top private school, you realize that the college admissions numbers may be distorted by athletes and legacy admissions, and that the actual curriculum is not necessarily stronger than what good public schools offer. So at some point you have to ask: is it really worth obsessing over something that may offer such poor value?

It’s not a secret that certain public districts and private schools have their matriculation stats skewed by legacy admissions, recruited athletes, and a wealthy family base with access to test prep and resume padding vehicles.

You don’t need to pay $40K for preschool, you don’t need to pay consultants to help you represent yourself and your child or understand schools, and you don’t need to focus heavily on matriculation stats when your child is applying to pre-K and will spend 14 years at the school (and may end up leaving prior to senior year). I have a friend who lost her mind when it came to admissions and was heavily prepping her kid at home - having them draw self portraits and critiquing - and obsessing over her interview outfit. Spoiler: It was not worth it.

As for the social status part, this is absolutely a thing. People also join country clubs and obsess over which neighborhood they live in for the social status. What other people attach their ego to is outside of your control, but what you attach your ego to is inside your control. Focus on your values and your children and you will feel less regret and better understand your why for doing things.

[Anonymous]

These comments prove no it’s not justified but it works well for some families and unnecessary for others. Plenty of people perfectly happy with both. People obsess about lots of things these days, blame social media for that.

[Anonymous]

People send their kids to private for all sorts of reasons. In my opinion, college admissions should be the smallest factor. If that’s your reason, it will likely not be worth it for you.

[Anonymous]

A lot of private school teachers send their kids to DCPS & MCPS…be clear about your goals & your kid. This area is rich with options.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People send their kids to private for all sorts of reasons. In my opinion, college admissions should be the smallest factor. If that’s your reason, it will likely not be worth it for you.

My main objective is getting high quality education. My only point is that college placement, something that is emphasized by schools as an indicator of quality of education, is extremely misleading by athletes and legacy admissions. In any case, I am not even thinking about what is going to happen 8 years down the road. I am concerned that my DC is not even learning the basics today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People send their kids to private for all sorts of reasons. In my opinion, college admissions should be the smallest factor. If that’s your reason, it will likely not be worth it for you.

My main objective is getting high quality education. My only point is that college placement, something that is emphasized by schools as an indicator of quality of education, is extremely misleading by athletes and legacy admissions. In any case, I am not even thinking about what is going to happen 8 years down the road. I am concerned that my DC is not even learning the basics today.

Why can't your kid learn the basics? Do you spend any time working with DC?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People send their kids to private for all sorts of reasons. In my opinion, college admissions should be the smallest factor. If that’s your reason, it will likely not be worth it for you.

My main objective is getting high quality education. My only point is that college placement, something that is emphasized by schools as an indicator of quality of education, is extremely misleading by athletes and legacy admissions. In any case, I am not even thinking about what is going to happen 8 years down the road. I am concerned that my DC is not even learning the basics today.

Why can't your kid learn the basics? Do you spend any time working with DC?

Yes, it is supplemented outside school. They do not learn the basics at the 50k private school.

[Anonymous]

I observed there are some students who can go to schools with sufficient quality education rather than the highest quality education.

[Anonymous]

OP, NCRC used to be more of a pipeline to some of the highly desired schools. Times are changing, some K-12 schools want more of a variety.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People send their kids to private for all sorts of reasons. In my opinion, college admissions should be the smallest factor. If that’s your reason, it will likely not be worth it for you.

My main objective is getting high quality education. My only point is that college placement, something that is emphasized by schools as an indicator of quality of education, is extremely misleading by athletes and legacy admissions. In any case, I am not even thinking about what is going to happen 8 years down the road. I am concerned that my DC is not even learning the basics today.

Why can't your kid learn the basics? Do you spend any time working with DC?

Yes, it is supplemented outside school. They do not learn the basics at the 50k private school.

Then move the kid. Unless you are not actually at the school for the education.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People send their kids to private for all sorts of reasons. In my opinion, college admissions should be the smallest factor. If that’s your reason, it will likely not be worth it for you.

My main objective is getting high quality education. My only point is that college placement, something that is emphasized by schools as an indicator of quality of education, is extremely misleading by athletes and legacy admissions. In any case, I am not even thinking about what is going to happen 8 years down the road. I am concerned that my DC is not even learning the basics today.

Why can't your kid learn the basics? Do you spend any time working with DC?

Yes, it is supplemented outside school. They do not learn the basics at the 50k private school.

Sounds like your kid is unfocused and screwing around.