Rejected from Virginia publics—am I out of line?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:JMU is good enough, just transfer after two years.

OR

She can apply to Pitt anytime and get OOS merit aid (Admissions Process For First-Year Students The University Of Pittsburgh operates on a rolling admission policy, which means that for our first-year students and undergraduate programs, there's no set deadline for applying to Pitt).

There’s no deadline for applications but the merit money at Pitt is first come, first served, and by this time of year it’s almost certainly gone.

[Anonymous]

You might as well change her last name to one that’s conventionally URM😆

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid, with a 3.9 weighted GPA, was accepted to VT - not engineering or business. Math up to AP Calc AB and AP Spanish. Lots of volunteer hours and EC related to their major. They spent A LOT of time answering those VT app questions. In state FCPS.

Forgot to add 1370 SAT.

Congratulations- waitlisted for similar stats

Was it for this year?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:4.1 weighted (school does not do UW), maxed out rigor, and involved in activities. Applied as an IR/gov/polisci major to UVA, William and Mary, and Virginia tech and was outright denied by UVA and W&M. VT waitlisted but as far as I know they have no ‘spring waitlist’ program or separate campus like UVA wise you can go to for a year instead.

The only thing I can think of that could be the cause of this is my daughter’s name, which sounds Asian American despite her being Caucasian. Her first name is a name that some people have said is a stereotypical Asian name (think Alice or Christina), and our last name is Lee, which could be either white or Asian Korean.

In our case, it’s white, but people have said in the past when they have seen my daughter’s name but not my daughter (at first meetings, summer camp, etc) that they were expecting an Asian girl based on her name.

My husband thinks I sound like I need to be medicated, but I floated the idea of taking a gap year and changing either my daughter’s first or last name to be more explicitly Caucasian. She was open to it and is very young for her cohort anyway so it wouldn’t make her feel out of place later.

Am I out of line here? I’m not saying that it’s right that there may be a disadvantage for Asian Americans, but I don’t want my daughter to be harmed by any sort of biases.

Did she at least get in some good privates? JHU? Rice? Emory? Vandy? and top liberal arts colleges?

With a 4.1W? No way. Scores are most likely 1150-1350 with that GPA, depending on the high school

OP here.

To answer many questions:
- She did not apply to Case Western.
- The reason I expected better results is because her older brothers had similar stats (and one slightly lower stats) and they both got into their colleges of choice.
- Her SAT score was 710 Verbal, 730 Math, which I thought was right at the median for UVA and William and Mary and above the average for Virginia Tech.

So your sons got in, but when your daughter didn’t, it’s because of racism? 😂 Make it make sense.

There's a lot if white grievance on DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid, with a 3.9 weighted GPA, was accepted to VT - not engineering or business. Math up to AP Calc AB and AP Spanish. Lots of volunteer hours and EC related to their major. They spent A LOT of time answering those VT app questions. In state FCPS.

Forgot to add 1370 SAT.

Congratulations- waitlisted for similar stats

Was it for this year?

Yes. EA.

[Anonymous]

But in all seriousness you have a kid who's dealing with rejection. It happens. Getting upset or trying to blame someone else or say it's unfair isn't healthy. It's okay to be disappointed, but that's how this process works. When she's applying for jobs she's likely going to have to deal with a lot more.

As a parent your job is to help her get happy with where she's at. "Let's plan a visit for admitted students day at JMU." "You're going to look great in purple." "This was a hard process, I know it's not the result you were hoping for but I know you worked hard and I'm proud of you."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid, with a 3.9 weighted GPA, was accepted to VT - not engineering or business. Math up to AP Calc AB and AP Spanish. Lots of volunteer hours and EC related to their major. They spent A LOT of time answering those VT app questions. In state FCPS.

Forgot to add 1370 SAT.

Congratulations- waitlisted for similar stats

Was it for this year?

Yes. EA.

Thats great!!4.05 gpa, heavy stem rigor with 1530 SAT, sports
leadership waitlisted

[Anonymous]

If you were so set on in state public did she apply to JMU, GMU, Longwood, Radford, UNW, CNU?

Do you know how many kids get rejected from UVA, W&M, and VT?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But in all seriousness you have a kid who's dealing with rejection. It happens. Getting upset or trying to blame someone else or say it's unfair isn't healthy. It's okay to be disappointed, but that's how this process works. When she's applying for jobs she's likely going to have to deal with a lot more.

As a parent your job is to help her get happy with where she's at. "Let's plan a visit for admitted students day at JMU." "You're going to look great in purple." "This was a hard process, I know it's not the result you were hoping for but I know you worked hard and I'm proud of you."

+100 I know several kids who've loved JMU. Time to start looking at the positives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:😆😆😆😆 You do realize being white or Asian is both a disadvantage?

OP here.

My husband said exactly this (are you him, ha!) and I’ll tell you what I told him.

If you look at all the data that has been released, it’s clear that Asians are at more of a disadvantage than whites. The magnitude varies, but it’s always greater than whites.

You're Asian, not white. Do you think we're idiots?

OP here. Why would I post this if I was Asian?

NP. I am a white American, last name Lee. Everyone assumes I will be Asian. I had a driver refuse to pick me up once because he didn't believe I could be a Lee.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
DID SHE GET IN ANYWHERE???

OP here.

Yes, she did. She is thinking (if no gap year) JMU then possible transfer. She was accepted at JMU.

So your entire subject line and premise was a lie. She got accepted to a Virginia public. Go away, OP, and get your DD excited about JMU.

OP here. I never said ‘every single Virginia public’ nor would I. Most schools take anyone. That’s not what I want for my daughter and it isn’t what you want for yours either so get off your high horse

Heh. My feet are planted quite firmly on the ground, OP. We were very clear with out two kids that our financed dictated they would be attending a Virginia public, and how very fortunate that we lived in a state with so many good options. We researched and visited most of them, and came away feeling pleased and excited about the opportunities and experiences they would have wherever they went. Our family prioritized academics, and both kids did well in terms of GPA and SAT scores, but--as many others on this thread have pointed out--it's quite competitive, so admission is not a guarantee.

You really blew it, OP. You and your DD could be really excited about JMU, but your approach and attitude has really soured the whole process and experience.

[Anonymous]

OP, I agree with your husband. Medication is in order. This is not normal behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
DID SHE GET IN ANYWHERE???

OP here.

Yes, she did. She is thinking (if no gap year) JMU then possible transfer. She was accepted at JMU.

So your entire subject line and premise was a lie. She got accepted to a Virginia public. Go away, OP, and get your DD excited about JMU.

OP here. I never said ‘every single Virginia public’ nor would I. Most schools take anyone. That’s not what I want for my daughter and it isn’t what you want for yours either so get off your high horse

Heh. My feet are planted quite firmly on the ground, OP. We were very clear with out two kids that our financed dictated they would be attending a Virginia public, and how very fortunate that we lived in a state with so many good options. We researched and visited most of them, and came away feeling pleased and excited about the opportunities and experiences they would have wherever they went. Our family prioritized academics, and both kids did well in terms of GPA and SAT scores, but--as many others on this thread have pointed out--it's quite competitive, so admission is not a guarantee.

You really blew it, OP. You and your DD could be really excited about JMU, but your approach and attitude has really soured the whole process and experience.

+100

[Anonymous]

Goodness, it's a crazy parent super upset at their child's college admissions results.
Wouldn't want to be living in that house right now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:4.1 weighted (school does not do UW), maxed out rigor, and involved in activities. Applied as an IR/gov/polisci major to UVA, William and Mary, and Virginia tech and was outright denied by UVA and W&M. VT waitlisted but as far as I know they have no ‘spring waitlist’ program or separate campus like UVA wise you can go to for a year instead.

The only thing I can think of that could be the cause of this is my daughter’s name, which sounds Asian American despite her being Caucasian. Her first name is a name that some people have said is a stereotypical Asian name (think Alice or Christina), and our last name is Lee, which could be either white or Asian Korean.

In our case, it’s white, but people have said in the past when they have seen my daughter’s name but not my daughter (at first meetings, summer camp, etc) that they were expecting an Asian girl based on her name.

My husband thinks I sound like I need to be medicated, but I floated the idea of taking a gap year and changing either my daughter’s first or last name to be more explicitly Caucasian. She was open to it and is very young for her cohort anyway so it wouldn’t make her feel out of place later.

Am I out of line here? I’m not saying that it’s right that there may be a disadvantage for Asian Americans, but I don’t want my daughter to be harmed by any sort of biases.

Did she at least get in some good privates? JHU? Rice? Emory? Vandy? and top liberal arts colleges?

With a 4.1W? No way. Scores are most likely 1150-1350 with that GPA, depending on the high school

OP here.

To answer many questions:
- She did not apply to Case Western.
- The reason I expected better results is because her older brothers had similar stats (and one slightly lower stats) and they both got into their colleges of choice.
- Her SAT score was 710 Verbal, 730 Math, which I thought was right at the median for UVA and William and Mary and above the average for Virginia Tech.

So you know it’s not the name, then. He must have the same last name.

OP here.

They both have very explicitly white names and middle names. Think Tanner for first name Bradley for second name. My daughter not only has the stereotypical first name but no middle name.

OP, she was BORDERLINE at best. A 4.1 does not cut it.

OP here.

It cut it for my sons and for at least one of her friends, so I don’t think that’s entirely true (friend was white but has minority last name).

In DCUM speak, tell me you use a burgundy washcloth and eat lightly fried tuna without telling me you use a burgundy washcloth and eat lightly friend tuna! It literally makes no sense that somehow different gender, different admissions year and for all we know different majors and colleges are somehow proof a 4.1 w is good enough for UVA and W&M and yet the sons having the EXACT SAME last name as the daughter and getting in is not proof enough that the last name is not the reason. Because somehow having a middle name makes the last name seem less ethnic for the boys than it does for the girl who doesn’t have a middle name.