Would you tell friend her daughter has a girlfriend?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A few of our friends have kids who all attend the same high school. My children attended a different high school. One friend said her child told her about my friend’s daughter and her girlfriend.

I personally would want to be made aware as a parent. I would also want to know if my daughter had a boyfriend.

None of your business. Stay out of it. Besides, it's hearsay. You heard from a friend who heard from her child about the daughter of another friend. C'mon. Get a grip.

[Anonymous]

My mom struggled to know the difference between wanting to know something and needing/deserving to know. As a child and teen, it was absolutely suffocating. It made me recoil against talking to her about anything at all. Sometimes this got me into some pretty bad situations, but even this didn’t change the dynamic To be honest, I still share only the minimal, all these years later.

It’s like her sense that she should get to know things prevented her from really knowing me at all. Makes me sad, but even now I look back and don’t really regret carving out space for myself that she never would have — bad situations and all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom struggled to know the difference between wanting to know something and needing/deserving to know. As a child and teen, it was absolutely suffocating. It made me recoil against talking to her about anything at all. Sometimes this got me into some pretty bad situations, but even this didn’t change the dynamic To be honest, I still share only the minimal, all these years later.

It’s like her sense that she should get to know things prevented her from really knowing me at all. Makes me sad, but even now I look back and don’t really regret carving out space for myself that she never would have — bad situations and all.

Great post. Thank you for sharing.

[Anonymous]

Easy to tell which posts are by kids and which by seasoned parents haha

[Anonymous]

This is extremely serious in my community. You must immediately tell the other parents.

How can they even begin to correct this if they do not even know it is occurring? Tell them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is extremely serious in my community. You must immediately tell the other parents.

How can they even begin to correct this if they do not even know it is occurring? Tell them.

And this is why you don't tell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We didn't find out our kid was gay until his mid-twenties but it appears that all our neighbors knew by the time he was in middle school. In retrospect I feel like an idiot and am also sort of bitter than no one thought this was information that we should have had as parents.

That says a lot about you.

What would cause you to say this?

I'm glad to see there's a solid consensus in this thread, but the posts from the OP and a couple others are pretty awful.

If your kids aren't telling you these things, they're not telling you for a reason. And if everyone else knows and not you, that should be a huge red flag.

Yeah, wow! Even the neighbors knew this parent was off. And years later, this parent still doesn’t understand why the situation says a lot about them? That’s wild.

If your kids aren’t telling you important things in their lives, that’s a you problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We didn't find out our kid was gay until his mid-twenties but it appears that all our neighbors knew by the time he was in middle school. In retrospect I feel like an idiot and am also sort of bitter than no one thought this was information that we should have had as parents.

That says a lot about you.

What would cause you to say this?

I'm glad to see there's a solid consensus in this thread, but the posts from the OP and a couple others are pretty awful.

If your kids aren't telling you these things, they're not telling you for a reason. And if everyone else knows and not you, that should be a huge red flag.

Yeah, wow! Even the neighbors knew this parent was off. And years later, this parent still doesn’t understand why the situation says a lot about them? That’s wild.

[b]If your kids aren’t telling you important things in their lives, that’s a you problem.

[b]

X1000

You have to be pretty dumb to not recognize that if your kids aren’t confiding in you about important things in their lives it’s because you haven’t created an environment where they aren’t confiding comfortable doing so.

[Anonymous]

OP, you are on an anonymous message board wondering if you should out a minor to her parents. Why don't you post your name and contact information here? You won't because you want your identity to remain private so you don't experience social exclusion/backlash. See how that works?

MYOB otherwise you'll traumatize this young woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is extremely serious in my community. You must immediately tell the other parents.

How can they even begin to correct this if they do not even know it is occurring? Tell them.

Which cult are you in?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is extremely serious in my community. You must immediately tell the other parents.

How can they even begin to correct this if they do not even know it is occurring? Tell them.

Which cult are you in?

+1

[Anonymous]

You need to tell the mom.

Parents are still parents. She has a right to know.

Do you want another situation like this on your hands?

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1286441.page

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are both kids around the same age? As long as it's not like "the art teacher is my girlfriend" I'd absolutely stay out of it.

+1.

Unless it’s some type of inappropriate or dangerous situation, this isn’t something you need to bring to their attention.

+1
MYOB

[Anonymous]

Mind your own business

[Anonymous]

I agree OP. I would want to know too.