Shocked at how many families in nice DMV neighborhoods are living in relatives' homes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

I don't know...I find this situation much more palatable than the family that just gets a big parent handout to buy a home.

In theory, this family is caring for the elderly parent so it solves a major problem for the elderly parents...which honestly will be a problem for basically anyone. The horror stories of parents at "great" assisted living/nursing homes are plentiful, while the stories of families having to accept that in-home nurses/caregivers will steal from their parents are also common.

Not sure what it is you are angry about in this situation.

Well, as long as it's palatable to you

Well, if my kids are wiping my a** when I am frail...seems like they deserve the house.

I guess you can't understand the difference, but enjoy that cut-rate assisted living facility.

[Anonymous]

Well, OP, bet you are entirely self made, right? Paid for schools all on your own? Got a house and job all on your own, not relying on friends and family for introductions, great deals or bail outs? Self made man, huh? Can’t imagine this is a pot calling kettle black situation, now is it? I bet that poor little ol’ me attitude serves you? Look around… you have done OK - but only because of the generosity of others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If OP goes to one of the "good" DCPS schools I would wager that a decent amount these families claiming to rent from a relative are not living there at all but just using the relative's address to get in-bound for the neighborhood school while they actually live elsewhere in DC or even in MD.

They just tell you they're "renting" from grandma because they don't want to admit to attendance fraud.

This is what I thought too. This type of attendance fraud is extremely common in DCPS, and renting from some relative is the go-to cover up.

[Anonymous]

What!? What do you mean that people are getting shut out? Of what?

You sound like you think people are entitled to buy homes and that owners should sell and not allow their adult kids to live there.

Get a grip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Always amazes me how people like OP feel entitled to other people's things.

OP here: we actually saved a six figure down-payment and closing costs without any family help. Paid for our own wedding too. Also paid off our student loans. But we got "lucky" by pivoting multiple times in our careers for better jobs, striving for big promotions, etc.

Vast majority of our friends who had a similar profile as us - i.e., had to pay for their own house, their own wedding, their own student loans - had to leave the area completely or moved very far out to make it work.

So, no, I do not feel entitled to other people's things. But it wasn't until our kid was in school that we really had no idea how "things really work" in nicer DMV neighborhoods.

You are fortunate then. I hope you can feel satisfied and happy with all that you have and have accomplished.

[Anonymous]

OP if you are offended why are living there? By fact of living in an “upscale DMV neighborhood” you are part of the same human drive of striving and wealth accumulation.

This is the point of striving - getting an education, getting a high paying job, accumulating property - so that you can make life easier for your kids and pass on wealth/property.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been living close to downtown Bethesda for more than 10 years, know hundreds of people from elementary, middle and high schools in the area because my kids are older teens, and NO, this is not a common occurrence, OP.

Why are you so obsessed with other people's living arrangements? We have no family help or high salaries, yet I have zero issues with the people who do. DH and I will be the generation who helps their children. If you have money, you'll do the same for your children. See how that works? Why is it a problem when others do it, but not when you do it?

Your jealousy is making you really stupid.

Another Bethesda resident. I know -0- families as you describe OP.

p.s. this falls under MYOB. Maybe some day your kid will "rent" your home from you and help you stay afloat!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Always amazes me how people like OP feel entitled to other people's things.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our kid (only-child) just finished kindergarten at a school in an upscale DMV neighborhood.

We've met at least a dozen families at our school who are living in a childhood home or a living in a house own by an elderly parent/relative and "paying rent" (whatever that means)

Though extracurricular activities we've met other families with the same arrangements in Chevy Chase, Bethesda, and upper NW DC. This is, in fact, pretty widespread.

So, if you're slogging away saving for that down payment, paying for child care and wondering "how do all these people do it????"....just know that this is one of the ways you're getting shut out. I'm honestly surprised at how widespread this is happening.

You've cracked the case!
Great job, Columbo.

This information is brand new and never, ever discussed ad nauseam here in the real estate sub.

They probably would've gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you pesky kids!

[Anonymous]

Lots of feigned outrage in here. Looks like OP got under people’s skin. You seemed to have hit a nerve.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Same in our neighborhood. We have multiple families who live in the same house with their parents and their own children (so three generations). The grandparents pay for and own the house. Then there are multiple families living in a house paid for by their parents who don’t live there but basically gifted it to them. These families all go to the expensive country club that their parents joined years ago and act very superior. Something about these rich country club people raising spoiled lazy kids who marry freeloaders that are after the family money.

Daaaamn, envy isn't a good look on you.

That's some major projecting you're doing there.
I know plenty of people who live in their parents old houses and not a single one of them is smug or arrogant.

You, however, are SUPER sanctimonious, which is just as ugly a trait as smug and arrogant are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Gross! People are living in your neighborhood and they can't actually afford it? So disgusting. Make sure you don't let your kids play with their kids. Living in your parents house in an expensive "elite area" like the ones you name is cheating. Gross, gross, gross.

Seriously, make sure you protect your kids by not allowing them to play with those kids. And if you see that family at the CC? Well, they are surely cheating with that -- clearly they couldn't afford the dues if they weren't "living at home."

Ugh. Only people who can afford the down payment on a 2M home -- right this minute -- should be able to live in those areas. Is there an HOA? Maybe you could petition them? Find a way to get rid of these freeloaders?

You have to have been able to save a six figure down payment all on your own, too... don't forget about that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What!? What do you mean that people are getting shut out? Of what?

You sound like you think people are entitled to buy homes and that owners should sell and not allow their adult kids to live there.

Get a grip.

A house full of people is not shutting other people out. You should be complaining about people with more than one home that lie empty part of the year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lots of feigned outrage in here. Looks like OP got under people’s skin. You seemed to have hit a nerve.

Nah, whiners don’t fare well here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m not surprised those who participate in this kind of arrangement jump to defend it. Entitled people tend to not see or care about the larger macro issues here - this directly contributes to shortage of housing supply which continues to drive up prices, making it all the more unaffordable for those who do not come from generational wealth.

This is why certain neighborhoods in DC and around - many already identified here like CCDC and CCMD - are insufferable. Full of old boomers and their entitled children.

You're stereotyping thousand of people that you don't know, in neighborhoods that you don't live in, lol.
How ignorant.

Maybe they're not entitled, maybe they can just smell your condescending judgment and choose not to associate with you?
I can certainly smell it from here.