SAHPs- how much do you spend on household help/childcare?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All these husbands with a SAHM, a nanny, and a housekeeper are being taken for a ride. If you pay someone else to do it all, what does he need you for? Hope you are good at it!

You must not make a lot of money. Having paid help is no big deal to DH. He didn’t marry me to cook and clean.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All these husbands with a SAHM, a nanny, and a housekeeper are being taken for a ride. If you pay someone else to do it all, what does he need you for? Hope you are good at it!

You must not make a lot of money. Having paid help is no big deal to DH. He didn’t marry me to cook and clean.

You must be a terrible mother. My DH prefers his children are taken care of during the day by their mother and not a nanny. Luckily I actually like raising my own children and prefer the same!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All these husbands with a SAHM, a nanny, and a housekeeper are being taken for a ride. If you pay someone else to do it all, what does he need you for? Hope you are good at it!

Most of my SAHM friends don’t have a nanny, but those who do have 3-4 kids so it’s usually the nanny is taking care of 1-2 kids at the same time the mom has the other kids. It’s not like the mom isn’t doing childcare too. I mean, I’m sure there’s Uber wealthy non working moms who don’t do any childcare but that hasn’t been my experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All these husbands with a SAHM, a nanny, and a housekeeper are being taken for a ride. If you pay someone else to do it all, what does he need you for? Hope you are good at it!

You must not make a lot of money. Having paid help is no big deal to DH. He didn’t marry me to cook and clean.

You must be a terrible mother. My DH prefers his children are taken care of during the day by their mother and not a nanny. Luckily I actually like raising my own children and prefer the same!

Good for you but this is a post about household help and childcare, so sounds like it’s not relevant to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All these husbands with a SAHM, a nanny, and a housekeeper are being taken for a ride. If you pay someone else to do it all, what does he need you for? Hope you are good at it!

You must not make a lot of money. Having paid help is no big deal to DH. He didn’t marry me to cook and clean.

You must be a terrible mother. My DH prefers his children are taken care of during the day by their mother and not a nanny. Luckily I actually like raising my own children and prefer the same!

Our house is almost 15,000sf. I have three kids and have household help and don’t feel bad about it. I used to have a FT housekeeper and now have a PT housekeeper. I don’t need a nanny since my children are school aged.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All these husbands with a SAHM, a nanny, and a housekeeper are being taken for a ride. If you pay someone else to do it all, what does he need you for? Hope you are good at it!

You must not make a lot of money. Having paid help is no big deal to DH. He didn’t marry me to cook and clean.

You must be a terrible mother. My DH prefers his children are taken care of during the day by their mother and not a nanny. Luckily I actually like raising my own children and prefer the same!

I’m a woman, but I guess that I feel like I prefer that my SAH husband is taking care of the kids and not doing a ton of chores.

I don’t want to do all of the chores either, so we hire a lot of them out.

[Anonymous]

Wow. Um, zero $. The “help” is me, myself, and I. I do it all, because I can, and use our money for trips and savings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow. Um, zero $. The “help” is me, myself, and I. I do it all, because I can, and use our money for trips and savings.

No family or friends help? Your husband never does the dishes or watches the children or drives anyone to activities? You do everything alone all of the time? Why?

[Anonymous]

SAHM with 1 and 3 yo. About $1500. Babysitters. Cleaners. Gym with childcare. When 3 yo starts preschool in the fall, it will be another $1500. Other things I consider help: Amazon, grocery delivery, food delivery, music and TV streaming services, and being able to outsource home maintenance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also, zero. I don’t know any SAHP that has a nanny. We’re the nannies! And housekeepers.

I know lots. Myself included. Maybe not in your neighborhood. But where I live we all have household help and many are sahm or part time .

[Anonymous]

Nothing, OP. I'm the housecleaner and caregiver. It's kind of the point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All these husbands with a SAHM, a nanny, and a housekeeper are being taken for a ride. If you pay someone else to do it all, what does he need you for? Hope you are good at it!

You must not make a lot of money. Having paid help is no big deal to DH. He didn’t marry me to cook and clean.

You must be a terrible mother. My DH prefers his children are taken care of during the day by their mother and not a nanny. Luckily I actually like raising my own children and prefer the same!

I’m a woman, but I guess that I feel like I prefer that my SAH husband is taking care of the kids and not doing a ton of chores.

I don’t want to do all of the chores either, so we hire a lot of them out.

I think it really comes down to this. If you actually like spending time with your kids and are engaged with them during the day. Then you are not just running errands, cleaning, cooking, ... you are doing stuff with the kids.

[Anonymous]

No. You do both. Love and adore my kids. We go to park and playground out to lunch. Shopping. Zoo etc. then sometime they are also with a nanny while I run errands or see friends or go to workout. I clean my house every day. Bathrooms and kitchen. Non stop. And laundry. But I also have cleaners who deep clean once a week and do the sheets and beds. I do all the cooking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Nothing, OP. I'm the housecleaner and caregiver. It's kind of the point.

I’m a SAHM. The point is childcare. I don’t clean my house, we hire someone for that. I also don’t do lawn care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Nothing, OP. I'm the housecleaner and caregiver. It's kind of the point.

I’m a SAHM. The point is childcare. I don’t clean my house, we hire someone for that. I also don’t do lawn care.

Depends on your perspective. I view myself as a homemaker, not just a mother and I am uncomfortable with the idea that housework is beneath me, but not beneath someone I would hire.