Private school or not

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We attended a regional event recently for kids from the DMV of kids who’ve been accepted to a particular well know, good ranking college. There were about 15 kids there and all but mind came from private schools in the area. It was eye opening. All but 2 were definitely going there. 2 are waiting for more results, mine being one of them.

As you said: in 10 years all the kids will be at the same schools.

Private school kids tend to have many benefits over public school kids, namely their parents who have a lot of resources and a desire to use them to further their children's education. In order to have those resources, the parents likely went to elite universities and conferred legacy status to their children. They also likely spent a lot of money on their children's extracurricular activities, like private lessons from a young age, and exposed their children to a variety of activities to explore their interests. It's very hard to evaluate the impact of private schools alone in college admissions.

The school has a good ranking but not great. In the 50s according to USNAWR. I wasn’t clear enough, but what surprised me was that all but one of these private school kids were going to this good but not great school.

[Anonymous]

We live in a neighborhood in MC where there is a split between children going to public and private (Bullis, Prep, etc.) schools. Over the years as the neighbor kids have gone away to college, we have not seen a notable advantage that private school has for college admissions. For every private school neighborhood kid who was accepted to a top 20 school, a public school kid in our neighborhood was also accepted. The one commonality is that the last 3-4 years is that a disproportionate number of neighborhood kids have gone to University of Michigan.

[Anonymous]

Yes, you can afford it. You have two fed pensions and health insurance coverage for life. 4 years is nothing really and you have one child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We attended a regional event recently for kids from the DMV of kids who’ve been accepted to a particular well know, good ranking college. There were about 15 kids there and all but mind came from private schools in the area. It was eye opening. All but 2 were definitely going there. 2 are waiting for more results, mine being one of them.

As you said: in 10 years all the kids will be at the same schools.

Private school kids tend to have many benefits over public school kids, namely their parents who have a lot of resources and a desire to use them to further their children's education. In order to have those resources, the parents likely went to elite universities and conferred legacy status to their children. They also likely spent a lot of money on their children's extracurricular activities, like private lessons from a young age, and exposed their children to a variety of activities to explore their interests. It's very hard to evaluate the impact of private schools alone in college admissions.

The school has a good ranking but not great. In the 50s according to USNAWR. I wasn’t clear enough, but what surprised me was that all but one of these private school kids were going to this good but not great school.

I'm not surprised given how many kids from the "big 3" end up at the elite universities. I don't think the DMV area private schools have a reputation for being excellent like some of the elite private schools in NY/NE.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We attended a regional event recently for kids from the DMV of kids who’ve been accepted to a particular well know, good ranking college. There were about 15 kids there and all but mind came from private schools in the area. It was eye opening. All but 2 were definitely going there. 2 are waiting for more results, mine being one of them.

As you said: in 10 years all the kids will be at the same schools.

Private school kids tend to have many benefits over public school kids, namely their parents who have a lot of resources and a desire to use them to further their children's education. In order to have those resources, the parents likely went to elite universities and conferred legacy status to their children. They also likely spent a lot of money on their children's extracurricular activities, like private lessons from a young age, and exposed their children to a variety of activities to explore their interests. It's very hard to evaluate the impact of private schools alone in college admissions.

The school has a good ranking but not great. In the 50s according to USNAWR. I wasn’t clear enough, but what surprised me was that all but one of these private school kids were going to this good but not great school.

I'm not surprised given how many kids from the "big 3" end up at the elite universities. I don't think the DMV area private schools have a reputation for being excellent like some of the elite private schools in NY/NE.

The big 3 are all from the dmv. That’s how they are referred to here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Never take financial advance from a forum where four pages of posters tell you that you afford private school tuition without knowing anything about your savings and retirement account balances.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We attended a regional event recently for kids from the DMV of kids who’ve been accepted to a particular well know, good ranking college. There were about 15 kids there and all but mind came from private schools in the area. It was eye opening. All but 2 were definitely going there. 2 are waiting for more results, mine being one of them.

As you said: in 10 years all the kids will be at the same schools.

Private school kids tend to have many benefits over public school kids, namely their parents who have a lot of resources and a desire to use them to further their children's education. In order to have those resources, the parents likely went to elite universities and conferred legacy status to their children. They also likely spent a lot of money on their children's extracurricular activities, like private lessons from a young age, and exposed their children to a variety of activities to explore their interests. It's very hard to evaluate the impact of private schools alone in college admissions.

This^^^. Those same kids were likely headed to elite or top universities no matter where they went to HS. It's the parental involvement and ability to supply whatever is needed (be it tutoring, paying for travel sports/expensive ECs, etc) and the expectation since they were born that they would be heading to college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I understand that private school is for families with 800k+ HHI. I know that in ten years children will be mostly attending the same schools and in twenty years most of them will be working at the same places making similar salaries. But both child and I LOVE the school. We are a fed family so making 300s. Market has bumped up our retirement to 1m and brokerage to another 1m. Some 529 that can also be tapped. Home is almost paid off and 2 investment properties. Can we afford 60k tuition and fees for 4 years for one child? Obviously no FA.

Correction. Private school is mostly for families that want to pretend they have an HHI of 800k+. It is an unusual club that materialistic and weak-minded individuals aspire to join in a vain attempt to achieve elite separation. Most amusing is that so many unenlightened individuals flaunt private school like a badge of honor when, in fact, it is a veritable cone of shame. Every kid that attends might as well be wearing a t-shirt that reads: “I couldn’t hack it in the real world, so my parents outsourced my upbringing to this incestuous place.”

You poor thing. I cannot fathom going through life this continually resentful and angry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We attended a regional event recently for kids from the DMV of kids who’ve been accepted to a particular well know, good ranking college. There were about 15 kids there and all but mind came from private schools in the area. It was eye opening. All but 2 were definitely going there. 2 are waiting for more results, mine being one of them.

As you said: in 10 years all the kids will be at the same schools.

Not an apples to apples comparison by any stretch. Just look at matriculation stats for top privates; the portion of students that they send to top colleges is much higher. Typically, the bottom quartile of their class is shooting for colleges that the second and 3rd quartile of public school students are shooting for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I understand that private school is for families with 800k+ HHI. I know that in ten years children will be mostly attending the same schools and in twenty years most of them will be working at the same places making similar salaries. But both child and I LOVE the school. We are a fed family so making 300s. Market has bumped up our retirement to 1m and brokerage to another 1m. Some 529 that can also be tapped. Home is almost paid off and 2 investment properties. Can we afford 60k tuition and fees for 4 years for one child? Obviously no FA.

Private school has nothing to do with getting a higher quality education. It costs $0 to learn, to accumulate knowledge, to build leadership, and to develop strong character. Private school is for parents that are too lazy to enforce rigor and discipline and for spoon-fed children that are incapable of rising above the distractions inherent in everyday life. So, OP, if either you or your children fall into these latter categories – if your family requires extra help overcoming adversity – then, by all means, push forward and go private. You can’t afford NOT to make the investment in this situation. These types of schools were explicitly created to provide a coddled environment for indolent guardians and the intellectually challenged. Hey…if the shoe fits….

LOL private school is for anyone who can afford it and anyone who feels their public school pyramid sucks. And many do these days. Pubic schools are suffering severe grade inflation as we speak and colleges are onto it. My kid is in private and has to get a 93 to achieve an A and maintain that grade for the entire semester (no marking periods to average). On the other hand, MCPS will give a semester grade of A to any kid who gets 79.5 and 89.5 in the two marking periods (B + A = A for semester). If that were my kid's school, that would equate to a solid B for the semester. Like I said, colleges know this and are looking to other factors to evaluate students. Grades are are pretty meaningless now in public schools. Hoping more and more colleges move back to standardized testing required. Add to all of this the fighting, vaping and sex in the bathrooms, and everything else, I would never send my kid to public even if money were tight...and I live in a very very strong school district.

Take a peek at this thread for more insight on grade deflation at MCPS and the impact on college admissions. https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1192373.page

Hate to break it to you but fighting, vaping, and sex and everything else, happens at private schools as well. But you keep thinking it doesn’t if that makes you feel better about the $200K you just spent on a private school. Bless your heart.

As someone with kids in both this is unequivocally not true.

I’ve yet to see ambulances pull up regularly to the private school. My kid in private doesn’t have to hold it all day to avoid the danger and utter grossness of the bathrooms. There hasn’t been any fights that caused an ambulance ride at private. My kid can carry a backpack into class in private. It goes on and on and on.

Where are these public schools? My DD's large public MS has had ambulance pull up once this year, over anaphylaxis. I know because the kid is a close friend of DD's. They don't hold it all day, and go to the bathrooms whenever they need to. There have been no fights in school that led to ambulance rides (which is not to say there haven't been fights; there are, and they're generally of the pushing and shoving variety). There was one serious incident involving a school kid, which happened outside of the school. My kid carries her backpack around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We attended a regional event recently for kids from the DMV of kids who’ve been accepted to a particular well know, good ranking college. There were about 15 kids there and all but mind came from private schools in the area. It was eye opening. All but 2 were definitely going there. 2 are waiting for more results, mine being one of them.

As you said: in 10 years all the kids will be at the same schools.

Not an apples to apples comparison by any stretch. Just look at matriculation stats for top privates; the portion of students that they send to top colleges is much higher. Typically, the bottom quartile of their class is shooting for colleges that the second and 3rd quartile of public school students are shooting for.

Obviously true. The top private HS are filled with really smart and motivated kids as well as really rich kids who have grown up expecting to excel and attend a great college. You've taken the top 15-20% of a typical high performing public HS and put them all together. Seems logical that majority are shooting for top tier of schools and the "bottom kids at the private" are attending 2nd tiered schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes you can afford.
Be prepared for lifestyle creep as your child grows up with and begins to ask for what the 1% "haves" have.... they will be exposed to frequent electronics upgrades, sports, travel, cars, designer everything

OP is the 1% "haves."

No. You’re Clueless. OP is in the 3%. The 1% has another level of money. There is a difference between flying to Cabo for vacation and flying to Cabo on a private jet. There is a difference between getting one Cartier watch and getting a Cartier every Christmas.

We are in the 1% and have a seven figure HHI. We are not flying on private jets. We don’t even fly business class. We are still spending 30-40k for spring break flying economy plus for a family of five.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes you can afford.
Be prepared for lifestyle creep as your child grows up with and begins to ask for what the 1% "haves" have.... they will be exposed to frequent electronics upgrades, sports, travel, cars, designer everything

OP is the 1% "haves."

No. You’re Clueless. OP is in the 3%. The 1% has another level of money. There is a difference between flying to Cabo for vacation and flying to Cabo on a private jet. There is a difference between getting one Cartier watch and getting a Cartier every Christmas.

We are in the 1% and have a seven figure HHI. We are not flying on private jets. We don’t even fly business class. We are still spending 30-40k for spring break flying economy plus for a family of five.

Same except I’m surprised your spring break is that expensive with exp flying economy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I understand that private school is for families with 800k+ HHI. I know that in ten years children will be mostly attending the same schools and in twenty years most of them will be working at the same places making similar salaries. But both child and I LOVE the school. We are a fed family so making 300s. Market has bumped up our retirement to 1m and brokerage to another 1m. Some 529 that can also be tapped. Home is almost paid off and 2 investment properties. Can we afford 60k tuition and fees for 4 years for one child? Obviously no FA.

Correction. Private school is mostly for families that want to pretend they have an HHI of 800k+. It is an unusual club that materialistic and weak-minded individuals aspire to join in a vain attempt to achieve elite separation. Most amusing is that so many unenlightened individuals flaunt private school like a badge of honor when, in fact, it is a veritable cone of shame. Every kid that attends might as well be wearing a t-shirt that reads: “I couldn’t hack it in the real world, so my parents outsourced my upbringing to this incestuous place.”

You poor thing. I cannot fathom going through life this continually resentful and angry.

Resentful and angry? Perhaps you desire this to be true to validate your own insecurities. Or perhaps you attended a private school yourself and, therefore, lack the sophistication and critical thinking skills necessary to properly comprehend PP’s commentary?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes you can afford.
Be prepared for lifestyle creep as your child grows up with and begins to ask for what the 1% "haves" have.... they will be exposed to frequent electronics upgrades, sports, travel, cars, designer everything

OP is the 1% "haves."

No. You’re Clueless. OP is in the 3%. The 1% has another level of money. There is a difference between flying to Cabo for vacation and flying to Cabo on a private jet. There is a difference between getting one Cartier watch and getting a Cartier every Christmas.

We are in the 1% and have a seven figure HHI. We are not flying on private jets. We don’t even fly business class. We are still spending 30-40k for spring break flying economy plus for a family of five.

Same except I’m surprised your spring break is that expensive with exp flying economy.

Our economy plus tickets cost 15k. Hotels are 2k per night. Our spring break will probably end up being 40-50k, not 30-40. I didn’t really think about it until thing this out.