So far I love being divorced

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I say get married early, have kids, divorce early!

How about you just stay single and leave the kids out of it? Growing up in a dysfunctional household messes kids up.

[Anonymous]

After 2025 women will not be able to begin divorce proceedings.

If you are in a crappy marriage now, do it now bec you won't be able to once republicans take power.

FACT

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Watching a few post-divorce lives play out over the years, my anecdotal sense is that there is a burst of exciting energy and then it's a return to the grind of life.

I'm not saying the divorce was a bad idea. These people had relationships that weren't exactly horrible, but they weren't good and I'm not sure how fixable they would have been with any amount of effort. The women, in particular, went through a stretch where the novelty of new guys, not having to deal with the old guys, etc. was really energizing. But, after a year or two, they mostly stopped dating and the reduced income became a drag.

Finances are a huge determining factor in post-divorce happiness. Know several couples where it has been a struggle in their 50s.

I watched a lot of my friends go kind of manic-euphoric-crazy in the immediate aftermath of divorce, but I’m the dumpee and feel too broken and humiliated to even think about dating. Of course, they were all a lot younger then than I am now and most were the initiators. I just hope once the finances are settled and it is all signed and done that I’ll have been able to shake off some of the dread and figure out a revised plan for my life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I say get married early, have kids, divorce early!

How about you just stay single and leave the kids out of it? Growing up in a dysfunctional household messes kids up.

You could be a preacher. That’s good material.

[Anonymous]

Can you make a reservation on a party bus to celebrate this divorce? It will be a fun night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Watching a few post-divorce lives play out over the years, my anecdotal sense is that there is a burst of exciting energy and then it's a return to the grind of life.

I'm not saying the divorce was a bad idea. These people had relationships that weren't exactly horrible, but they weren't good and I'm not sure how fixable they would have been with any amount of effort. The women, in particular, went through a stretch where the novelty of new guys, not having to deal with the old guys, etc. was really energizing. But, after a year or two, they mostly stopped dating and the reduced income became a drag.

Finances are a huge determining factor in post-divorce happiness. Know several couples where it has been a struggle in their 50s.

I watched a lot of my friends go kind of manic-euphoric-crazy in the immediate aftermath of divorce, but I’m the dumpee and feel too broken and humiliated to even think about dating. Of course, they were all a lot younger then than I am now and most were the initiators. I just hope once the finances are settled and it is all signed and done that I’ll have been able to shake off some of the dread and figure out a revised plan for my life.

I think my XH is the manic euphoric crazy one. I've always been the stable one.

[Anonymous]

How did you meet BF? What works so well about the relationship?

[Anonymous]

How long did you wait / date before sex in new relationship?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can you make a reservation on a party bus to celebrate this divorce? It will be a fun night.

i

In my 50s— that sounds awful. And seeing a bunch of middle aged drunk women acting like college girls, no thanks.

Maybe for the 30-something divorcees.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you make a reservation on a party bus to celebrate this divorce? It will be a fun night.

i

In my 50s— that sounds awful. And seeing a bunch of middle aged drunk women acting like college girls, no thanks.

Maybe for the 30-something divorcees.

It is not like that. Just visiting different bars and having one drink but not getting drunk. These are adults not college kids. It’s better than sitting on the couch and watching TV. It was fun and classy and the bus was very clean.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How did you meet BF? What works so well about the relationship?

Online dating app.

I went on a few dates. Maybe met like 10 men, one lasted 4 months but never developed into a relationship, then met current boyfriend. I wasn’t eager for a relationship but also not eager to sleep with anyone, so I screened carefully.

Not sure he would make DCUM’s idea of eligible bachelor due to low salary, but for me he is great - emotionally intelligent, kind, in a related field as me (based on our values, both somewhat idealistic), and his family background suits my family structure well. Kids adore him. We live separately and haven’t merged anything. It works because we are just girlfriend/boyfriend companions and not parenting together (though he helps out). We’ll see how it lasts, so far it keeps getting better, including the sex. Oh and we both are willing to work on ourselves which is important.