18-year-old DS wants to drop out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would move mountains to convince him (obv you can’t force) to finish high school. Including calling his boss, but I’m kind of shocked his boss wouldn’t care if he finished high school or not. It doesn’t sound like he is a good boss and definitely doesn’t have his best interests in mind- forget best, but just general interest. Surely he knows that finishing high school is a necessity

Why do you think his boss would give AF about this kid? The boss has a reliable worker and wants that reliable worker to be available for more jobs to generate more revenue for the business. He wants that money now, not in May. In fact, it is probably better for the boss if this kid has less career mobility because that means he will be stuck with boss and will have less ability to bargain for higher compensation in the future.

Yup.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’d explain it to him that this guy may hire him without a diploma but most other carpentry jobs will require it. Especially if he ever wants a union job, which he should want as then he will get over $35 plus pension plus healthcare. Have him do some research about other carpentry positions that are posted.

This. I would pay him to stay in school and graduate at the end of the year if I needed to.

His current employer sees a gullible 18 year old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d explain it to him that this guy may hire him without a diploma but most other carpentry jobs will require it. Especially if he ever wants a union job, which he should want as then he will get over $35 plus pension plus healthcare. Have him do some research about other carpentry positions that are posted.

This. I would pay him to stay in school and graduate at the end of the year if I needed to.

His current employer sees a gullible 18 year old.

Yes plus share stats for how much more vulnerable people without basic HS education are further down the road - it impacts everything from job security in economic downturns to health to outcomes for their own children.

[Anonymous]

OP, you should not pay him to stay in school. He needs to be able to recognize that this is a huge mistake. You should call his bluff. If he drops out he pays rent, his own bill etc.
If he chooses to move out then so be it. My soon to be high schooler I'd talking about not finishing high school.and we've made it very clear that the day they drop out of school they have to move out. Not everything is a negotiation

[Anonymous]

My friend's son dropped out of high school at the end of junior year. Took the GED exam.

He entered an electrician apprentice program and in five years became a licensed electrician. He was paid each year of the program.

Now he is married, owns a home, wife stays home, daughter is in a private school. Not the DC area -- one that is a bit less expensive. All happy.

Good luck OP to your son. There are lots of paths to a good happy life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you should not pay him to stay in school. He needs to be able to recognize that this is a huge mistake. You should call his bluff. If he drops out he pays rent, his own bill etc.
If he chooses to move out then so be it. My soon to be high schooler I'd talking about not finishing high school.and we've made it very clear that the day they drop out of school they have to move out. Not everything is a negotiation

Young people are stupid. I’m the PP who dropped out of high school. This kid is going to do what he wants to do, unless there is a tangible incentive to stay in school. He might come to his senses, but he also may not. I would pay for him to stay in school if I could. He’s not going to understand the implications of not having a high school diploma.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would move mountains to convince him (obv you can’t force) to finish high school. Including calling his boss, but I’m kind of shocked his boss wouldn’t care if he finished high school or not. It doesn’t sound like he is a good boss and definitely doesn’t have his best interests in mind- forget best, but just general interest. Surely he knows that finishing high school is a necessity

Why do you think his boss would give AF about this kid? The boss has a reliable worker and wants that reliable worker to be available for more jobs to generate more revenue for the business. He wants that money now, not in May. In fact, it is probably better for the boss if this kid has less career mobility because that means he will be stuck with boss and will have less ability to bargain for higher compensation in the future.

Yup.

And that is who you’d give up high school to work for? A poor leader like that? You’d have to be an idiot to do that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He started working summers and weekends as a carpenters apprentice the summer before his junior year. His skills have improved and his boss offered him full time hours. Even working weekends he’s making a really good hourly wage and I think he’s enticed with that tripling if he were to be available full-time.

We are honestly fine with him not going to college and pursuing this after graduation. However, we are adamant he needs to graduate and it makes more sense to just finish out the year. The job will be available in 6 months.

He’s fighting us on it and we realize we can do very little to stop him. Has anyone been in a similar situation?

Just let him find his own way. Not everyone needs a diploma. Clinton was wrong about that. Full stop.

[Anonymous]

Things for him to consider: will he lose friends and is that important to him? Guessing he works with older people so friendships with them outside of work may not happen.

Does he play any HS sports? He'll lose that.

Does he think about running his own business? A diploma will help him.

Have him consider what he's losing by quitting, no just gaining.

[Anonymous]

If he can pass the GED exam now, let him pass it now.

When I was a junior in HS there was a budget fight in our state that posed some real risk of cutting money in our district for the kinds of classes I was in school for. (It was a big enough risk that the NYT covered it at the time.) I strongly considered leaving and taking a GED but all of my teachers were hell-bent on the idea that a HS diploma was more valuable and that I'd be sorry if I didn't get one.

I took their advice, but they were wrong. I graduated with my class and attended a SLAC that is often mentioned here. The admissions officer at that college told me to my face that my test scores alone were persuasive to the college I attended and that having a GED would have been an interesting feature, not an obstacle to admitting me. I am sure this would be doubly true of a kid who had done it in order to learn an actual trade.

Since graduate school, I have never been asked about a HS diploma again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you should not pay him to stay in school. He needs to be able to recognize that this is a huge mistake. You should call his bluff. If he drops out he pays rent, his own bill etc.
If he chooses to move out then so be it. My soon to be high schooler I'd talking about not finishing high school.and we've made it very clear that the day they drop out of school they have to move out. Not everything is a negotiation

Young people are stupid. I’m the PP who dropped out of high school. This kid is going to do what he wants to do, unless there is a tangible incentive to stay in school. He might come to his senses, but he also may not. I would pay for him to stay in school if I could. He’s not going to understand the implications of not having a high school diploma.

This post makes so many prejudiced assumptions, I do not know where to begin.

[Anonymous]

OP, look into "alternative" high schools in your district. Most of the counties have them. They are specifically for kids who can't attend regular school, and often the reason is because they work during the day. The hours are a bit different and might work for him, plus they don't make them take all the BS courses that they don't need to graduate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I nearly dropped out, but by the time I turned 16 and was old enough to, I had already gone more than halfway through high school. It was hell, and I didn't want it to be for nothing, which it would be. Plus, you never know where life will take you, especially with a physical job, so having even the tiniest sliver of an education to slap on a resume is important.

He's literally got what - seven months left of school? Tell him to suck it up and finish. He can work full time when school is on break for the holidays, Presidents Day week, spring break, etc. Then once he graduates he can work full time to his heart's content.

And his boss is a real jerk to offer this now - he should have said your son has a full time job offer waiting for him contingent ONLY upon HS graduation.

This. If he truly values your son, he will wait until he graduates from high school.

If not, the boss is being selfish and doesn't give a rat's a&& about your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely no
OP you failed

Basic HS diploma this is not hard.

If your kids bucks this then they move out no car no phone whatever you pay for gone.

Your kid doesn’t need college but they do need a basic education clearly you have failed

I failed what? Parenthood? Did I at least get a high failing grade? I’d love to see the key.

[Anonymous]

He had a meeting with the schools career and college counselor and next semester he’s going to switch to the work program. He’ll only have to be in class two long days a week to meet all prerequisites for graduation. He can work the other three which will give him substantially more hours.

I think he got excited at the prospect of making a lot more money and didn’t really think about the implications of his decision. Whoever suggested him potentially needing to take business classes in the future,
Thank you! I think that's what persuaded him. He seems on board for now.