Would you let your child eat lunch in the school psychologist's office?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes I would be concerned. I am a mandated reporter myself and the rules are pretty stringent. Some people use their common sense and wisdom more than others; some might report the slightest thing. You will be fine unless you are truly abusing your child but you will be subjected to checks before they clear you. I have made it a point to try to never have my child 1:1 with mandated reporters unless necessary (like a teacher). Your DD won’t be there alone but still.

TL;DR: I am concerned about any fly on the wall situation with a mandated reporter. I’d have a talk with my kid to keep things about his parents and home life to himself and basically to never forget there is a teacher there and be on his best behavior (no dumb jokes etc).

:shock:

This is the only creepy thing I’ve read on this thread.

The three mandates of dysfunctional families: don't feel, don't trust, don't tell.

When I was newly married, my new SIL launched into a story about how her DD messed up and erroneously told a trusted teacher that her father was abusive towards her. They painted it as her exaggerating because she was disgruntled about discipline.

There was a general investigation but it all cleared up. They kept telling her that she needed to watch what she said or she could get the family in trouble. It was really confusing to me why they would even talk about this in front of me (I get it now.)

Fast forward more than a decade, and I hear from others that BIL was physically abusive towards niece.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes I would be concerned. I am a mandated reporter myself and the rules are pretty stringent. Some people use their common sense and wisdom more than others; some might report the slightest thing. You will be fine unless you are truly abusing your child but you will be subjected to checks before they clear you. I have made it a point to try to never have my child 1:1 with mandated reporters unless necessary (like a teacher). Your DD won’t be there alone but still.

TL;DR: I am concerned about any fly on the wall situation with a mandated reporter. I’d have a talk with my kid to keep things about his parents and home life to himself and basically to never forget there is a teacher there and be on his best behavior (no dumb jokes etc).

:shock:

This is the only creepy thing I’ve read on this thread.

The three mandates of dysfunctional families: don't feel, don't trust, don't tell.

When I was newly married, my new SIL launched into a story about how her DD messed up and erroneously told a trusted teacher that her father was abusive towards her. They painted it as her exaggerating because she was disgruntled about discipline.

There was a general investigation but it all cleared up. They kept telling her that she needed to watch what she said or she could get the family in trouble. It was really confusing to me why they would even talk about this in front of me (I get it now.)

Fast forward more than a decade, and I hear from others that BIL was physically abusive towards niece.

I don’t physically abuse my kid but it’s quite easy to misconstrue things in this country. Saying or doing, both. It all clears up eventually but at what cost.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid eats in the band room every day. It has been the best thing for them that happened in middle school. Safe place with like-minded people and a trusted adult quietly in the background? So grateful to that teacher for allowing it.

Very different from a psychologist office imo

What's the difference? She's not providing therapy.

She thinks she knows a lot about psychology and if she wants she can chat a kid up asking personal questions. No abuse in my house but I don’t need anyone to know too much about my home life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid eats in the band room every day. It has been the best thing for them that happened in middle school. Safe place with like-minded people and a trusted adult quietly in the background? So grateful to that teacher for allowing it.

Very different from a psychologist office imo

But why?

[Anonymous]

Why would you care? Sounds great

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d have a problem with the fact that the school psychologist introduced themselves as Ms. X.

Why?

Because a psychologist is a doctor.

This is the problem with the mental health industry. They want you to think they're doctors. They're not. If they are a psychologist and call themselves doctor, they have a doctoral degree. Like many people who stayed in school after masters.
They have zero medical training.

[Anonymous]

I’m a school counselor. Kids eat in groups in my room often. There is nothing nefarious going on. Typically, they’re introverts who need a break from the loud cafeteria. To the PP who called school counselors “young and dumb,” I am neither. Neither are my colleagues. I have been in the field for 20 years and have two master’s degrees, both from top universities. Also, I have never made a report based on something that was said in that type of group lunch scenario. I would be concerned, however, if a parent seemed paranoid about their child eating lunch in my office. I might wonder what they were afraid would come out. Also, when kids are abused at home, they probably don’t want to announce it in front of peers. That information is going to come out in a different way, either because a worried friend flagged the issue, or because they came to school with bruises, or because they spoke individually with a trusted adult. That trusted person may or may not be their counselor, fwiw. It could be a coach, a teacher, or any number of other people with whom they interact at school or after school. TLDR, I’d let your child eat lunch with their friends in the school psychologist’s office.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d have a problem with the fact that the school psychologist introduced themselves as Ms. X.

Why?

Because a psychologist is a doctor.

This is the problem with the mental health industry. They want you to think they're doctors. They're not. If they are a psychologist and call themselves doctor, they have a doctoral degree. Like many people who stayed in school after masters.
They have zero medical training.

And?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a fair point that a student should never be 1:1 with a teacher with a door closed.

And the student should be frequently reminded that no teacher is ever allowed to ask a child to keep a secret about anything, and any one who does is trying to hurt the student.

And students should report any teacher who breaks these rules with any students.

We've had rapes in school.

Is any of what you describe included in OP’s post? No. In fact, the counselor informed the parent of a situation the parent was not aware of. Sounds like this counselor is not what you are afraid of.

Yea, if this psychologist (or any teacher) was a predator...highly doubt they're going to reach out to the parent to inform them the child is eating lunch in the classroom/office. Logic...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d have a problem with the fact that the school psychologist introduced themselves as Ms. X.

Why?

Because a psychologist is a doctor.

This is the problem with the mental health industry. They want you to think they're doctors. They're not. If they are a psychologist and call themselves doctor, they have a doctoral degree. Like many people who stayed in school after masters.
They have zero medical training.

School psychologists can either have specialist-level degrees (basically a "double master's" in psych + education, then a yearlong internship) or doctoral degrees. I assume that since the psych introduced herself as Ms., rather than Dr., she has a specialist degree.

[Anonymous]

It’s fine. The kid found a quiet spot with others. Very nice school psychologist to allow this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow you are lucky to have that

school counselor

Plus 1

[Anonymous]

School psychologists and school counselors have different roles than clinical psychologists and therapists. They are more like a related service provider (e.g. a speech therapist) in terms of their role in the building, and they definitely take on other duties such as helping with carpool, providing small group lunch supervision etc . . . They have different degrees. They don't do formal therapy. They tend to provide support that's more intermittent and focused on solving immediate problems.

This kind of thing is very appropriate for this role, even though it would be a total ethical violation in a more clinical relationship.

[Anonymous]

Op, what are YOU hiding? What skeletons are you worried will come out of your closet?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d have a problem with the fact that the school psychologist introduced themselves as Ms. X.

Why?

Because a psychologist is a doctor.

That’s beyond stupid.

+1 WTH does that have to do with anything? She’s there with other kids socializing. This is ridiculous.