Would you let your child eat lunch in the school psychologist's office?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes I would be concerned. I am a mandated reporter myself and the rules are pretty stringent. Some people use their common sense and wisdom more than others; some might report the slightest thing. You will be fine unless you are truly abusing your child but you will be subjected to checks before they clear you. I have made it a point to try to never have my child 1:1 with mandated reporters unless necessary (like a teacher). Your DD won’t be there alone but still.

TL;DR: I am concerned about any fly on the wall situation with a mandated reporter. I’d have a talk with my kid to keep things about his parents and home life to himself and basically to never forget there is a teacher there and be on his best behavior (no dumb jokes etc).

This is the only creepy thing I’ve read on this thread.

The three mandates of dysfunctional families: don't feel, don't trust, don't tell.

[Anonymous]

I'm a school speech pathologist and I have a bunch of kids who prefer to eat in my room, including kids who don't receive speech services. It's quiet, I have snacks, I sometimes we listen to music, sometimes they're alone, sometimes they bring a friend. Sometimes we chat and sometimes we do our own thing, whatever the kids needs in the moment.

The cafeteria and surrounding areas are pure chaos and plenty of kids find their trusted adult to spend lunch time with.

[Anonymous]

This is GREAT! GREAT! My kids were always looking for nice, quiet and clean places to eat lunch with their friends. That psychologist sounds amazing. My kids used to eat the in the Art room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a school speech pathologist and I have a bunch of kids who prefer to eat in my room, including kids who don't receive speech services. It's quiet, I have snacks, I sometimes we listen to music, sometimes they're alone, sometimes they bring a friend. Sometimes we chat and sometimes we do our own thing, whatever the kids needs in the moment.

The cafeteria and surrounding areas are pure chaos and plenty of kids find their trusted adult to spend lunch time with.

You sound like a wonderful person. Thank you for doing that for the kids. It's so nice to read about someone who gets high school kids.

[Anonymous]

Fine by me. My kid eats in a classroom as well, with a few friends and an OK from the teacher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes I would be concerned. I am a mandated reporter myself and the rules are pretty stringent. Some people use their common sense and wisdom more than others; some might report the slightest thing. You will be fine unless you are truly abusing your child but you will be subjected to checks before they clear you. I have made it a point to try to never have my child 1:1 with mandated reporters unless necessary (like a teacher). Your DD won’t be there alone but still.

TL;DR: I am concerned about any fly on the wall situation with a mandated reporter. I’d have a talk with my kid to keep things about his parents and home life to himself and basically to never forget there is a teacher there and be on his best behavior (no dumb jokes etc).

All teachers are mandated reporters in addition to psychologists. Not sure what the issue is here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes I would be concerned. I am a mandated reporter myself and the rules are pretty stringent. Some people use their common sense and wisdom more than others; some might report the slightest thing. You will be fine unless you are truly abusing your child but you will be subjected to checks before they clear you. I have made it a point to try to never have my child 1:1 with mandated reporters unless necessary (like a teacher). Your DD won’t be there alone but still.

TL;DR: I am concerned about any fly on the wall situation with a mandated reporter. I’d have a talk with my kid to keep things about his parents and home life to himself and basically to never forget there is a teacher there and be on his best behavior (no dumb jokes etc).

What are you afraid of? Kids spend a huge chunk of their time in school - why wouldn't you want them to have people they trust to interact with? At the high school level they're going to be in the real world soon - it's a great time to learn how to speak with adults in different settings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a school speech pathologist and I have a bunch of kids who prefer to eat in my room, including kids who don't receive speech services. It's quiet, I have snacks, I sometimes we listen to music, sometimes they're alone, sometimes they bring a friend. Sometimes we chat and sometimes we do our own thing, whatever the kids needs in the moment.

The cafeteria and surrounding areas are pure chaos and plenty of kids find their trusted adult to spend lunch time with.

This is awesome. My 12 yo entering 7th grade DD is already talking about how Mrs. Larla lets them eat in the Choir room if they want, and who else she hopes is in her lunch period so they can eat there together. Idk what the MS lunch rooms are like in your district, and God bless you if they are just lovely-- but that's not what we're dealing with here. It can get pretty bad. I am so grateful for the kindness of these teachers.

[Anonymous]

Our schools have closed off quiet rooms for kids who want a break from chaos. There also kids who eat with various school personnel.

[Anonymous]

When my kids were in MS, the counselor favored her kid and their friends. No other kids could eat in her special lunch group, esp those on the outs with her kid. No flash passes or any support for kids being harassed and bullied at lunch. Kids knew and it created an atmosphere of distrust.

OP, you are lucky the counselor is seen by kids as a trusted adult who will offer a comfortable space.

[Anonymous]

My kid's school allows kids to pick where they want to eat, so this wouldn't be odd at all. I think its highly considerate that she or he thought to email you about it.

[Anonymous]

I've always appreciated the staff who allowed my kids to eat lunch in their rooms. Sometimes it was as a 'guest' of a kid who had an accommodation or told they could invite a friend(s) to a focus group. Sometimes it was just a staff member who opened their classroom to anyone who wanted a different space. It meant a lot to my kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid eats in the band room every day. It has been the best thing for them that happened in middle school. Safe place with like-minded people and a trusted adult quietly in the background? So grateful to that teacher for allowing it.

Very different from a psychologist office imo

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes I would be concerned. I am a mandated reporter myself and the rules are pretty stringent. Some people use their common sense and wisdom more than others; some might report the slightest thing. You will be fine unless you are truly abusing your child but you will be subjected to checks before they clear you. I have made it a point to try to never have my child 1:1 with mandated reporters unless necessary (like a teacher). Your DD won’t be there alone but still.

TL;DR: I am concerned about any fly on the wall situation with a mandated reporter. I’d have a talk with my kid to keep things about his parents and home life to himself and basically to never forget there is a teacher there and be on his best behavior (no dumb jokes etc).

What are you afraid of? Kids spend a huge chunk of their time in school - why wouldn't you want them to have people they trust to interact with? At the high school level they're going to be in the real world soon - it's a great time to learn how to speak with adults in different settings.

I have heard about too many cases of kids getting in trouble for saying too much. Teens tend to tell inappropriate jokes, for one thing. I don’t want my child to be labeled anti whatever for this. Another issue: there is an example right here on this forum when a child said that the mom would get physical with her and the dad was asking if it’s grounds for him getting more custody. I could also easily see it as a mandated reporting situation. No thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes I would be concerned. I am a mandated reporter myself and the rules are pretty stringent. Some people use their common sense and wisdom more than others; some might report the slightest thing. You will be fine unless you are truly abusing your child but you will be subjected to checks before they clear you. I have made it a point to try to never have my child 1:1 with mandated reporters unless necessary (like a teacher). Your DD won’t be there alone but still.

TL;DR: I am concerned about any fly on the wall situation with a mandated reporter. I’d have a talk with my kid to keep things about his parents and home life to himself and basically to never forget there is a teacher there and be on his best behavior (no dumb jokes etc).

All teachers are mandated reporters in addition to psychologists. Not sure what the issue is here.

1) teachers aren’t as trained in eliciting trust and don’t really spend 1:1 time with kids; not even in small groups for long
2) school counselors are dumber on average than teachers because they are most often youngish and inexperienced