You may be thin, but you apparently also suffer from a cognitive impairment that prevents you from reading and retaining information. |
I take it you did not bother to read the article linked by OP. |
The part about the author’s mother killed me. My mom always wore black pants growing up, she had probably three pairs and never wore other colors. I’ve never even seen her in a bathing suit. Swimming was just not a thing she would do. She didn’t like pictures and I have few of them with her. My mom is such a beautiful person and she always cared about her makeup and hair, but her weight was such a central part of her life that it took away from living it. |
I worry that this is how my daughter will remember me as well. |
This spoke to me too. My mother was obsessed with her weight and it left me and my sister with seriously disordered eating habits. My mother called me "Little Chubby" as a child, presumably to humiliate me so that I would lose weight, and of course, I obliged. I began counting calories at age 12 and have never been able to stop. I became anorexic and bulimic at age 16 and have struggled to eat normally my whole life. Family dinners were a nightmare - my parents always commented on whether or not we were eating too much, and acted like having seconds was a moral failing. My father is a pediatrician who - wait for it - views fat people as disgusting, lazy, and out-of-control. He's retired now, but I have no doubt he told every single overweight child who came into his office (and probably their parents, too) to lose weight. He can't go anywhere without commenting on people's weight, especially women's: "The woman sitting next to me on the plane was so fat, I barely had any room." I feel sorry for him and his inability to see beyond people's appearance and treat them with dignity and respect. I call him out every time he makes a remark about someone's weight, but it doesn't make any difference (he's 85). I have done my best to model healthy eating habits for my kids, to show them that good-quality, well-prepared food is something to be savored and enjoyed. I never talk about calories or weight - I talk about "healthy." I don't want their self-esteem linked in any way to their eating habits or weight. If you saw me, you'd see a normal weight (but not skinny) woman and would probably never imagine the mental energy I expend on whether or not I'm overweight. Our culture's obsession with size is shitty for everyone. I always wonder whether my life would have been a lot different if my mother hadn't called me "chubby" and my father hadn't been harshly critical of fat people. |
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My daughters grew up eating healthfully, with a few snacks thrown in, and being active.
They're now morbidly obese, as adults. I have no idea why. My own mother can't stand to visit with us as she says she can't watch them eat themselves to death. |
Well, that last line explains a lot about the pathology of your poor daughters. |
I know. I feel so sorry for them that she feels this way I NEVER invite her over. |
I don't disagree with anything in the article except that the "biggest" problem is shaming... is that really the biggest problem, or is it the stuff they're putting in our food? The article states that Americans eat fewer calories today than they did in 2003, but we're still fatter. So even if nobody was shaming us from 2003-2022, wouldn't we still have gained weight because of our food? |
If you really think that 75 - 80% of Americans have access to and can afford healthy, fresh food, you need to educate yourself beyond your current ignorance. When you take a breath from your assumptions about “culture”, go price out the differences per serving between “frozen dinners and ice cream” and “produce and fresh meat”. You seem to think you know what people can afford because you paused to sneer at them in a store. |
The shaming is used by the lobbyists for the food companies that are actually killing us to stop any productive conversation about regulation of poisonous food and the deeply harmful food supply. Food companies, taking a page from cigarette companies, publish articles and get doctors to grow that narrative. But they rely heavily on popular culture shame to push their agenda. So I disagree with your presumption, because I think without the shaming, as a society we would be much further along in the conversation about what will really eventually have to happen to solve this issue: significant legislation and regulation. So while I don’t think the shame is the root cause, I do think it is the biggest problem because it has effectively stopped the change that really needs to happen. |
Amen. Get out of your bubble. Have you ever been outside of NW DC? Huge swaths of this city lack a decent supermarket, and processed/fast foods are so much cheaper than fresh ones. Plus, if you're a single mom with three kids and two jobs, do you have time to whip up a healthy omelet with spinach for breakfast, or make your child avocado toast and grilled fish for dinner? I agree that the focus should be on developing healthy eating habits in the first place, but that's really hard for a lot of families to do, for many reasons that have nothing to do with "culture" or "laziness" or "genetics." The reasons reflect the policy priorities of this country. |
Aside from the shaming aspect, we aren't giving enough attention to the fact that metabolism decreases with weight loss. Maintaining can be harder than losing and once you lose the first time you will never be at the same level as a naturally thin person. I once lost a significant amount of weight and maintaining it (which I did for two years) was harder than losing it. I was working out 2+ hours a day and eating around 1,000 calories. When I got pregnant with my first I gained a lot of it back, and the rest of it back when I was pregnant for my second (which also required bed rest). I've done weight watchers since and lost nothing. I still work out. I am significantly overweight.
The shaming is very real, too. Both DH and I have larger families. Our babies were born normal weight but gained weight quickly even EBF. Both of my kids had their weight flagged as problematic from about 3 months on... They already hate doctors. |
Do you always ignore facts and studies in favor of your anecdotal experience or do you just have a special blind spot for obesity research? |