How unprofessional was this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - it is just so demoralizing that we are still doing this. DS has no symptoms and was negative on a rapid test but of course we have to wait and do a PCR and quarantine because he isn't vaccinated yet. I work from home and so does my husband so that isn't a problem but DS is so young and mischevious that we can't leave him unattended for a second. Older kids are easier to deal with during a meeting - give them a ipad and a snack and they are fine.

You did your best. Let it go. If there is any fall-out from it, deal with it as best you can.

What more can you do? Nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you have a two year old with no safe place for him? That’s insane.

Op here - where would you put a 2 year old? Or strap them to what? I am confused.

DP. Mom of 7. You don't have a pac-n-play? You don't have a crib? You don't have a contained small room that is child safe with a baby gate set up?

I would have moved heaven and earth to reset my laptop and camera so that my kid was in a contained thing (aforesaid pac-n-play or crib or small room with baby gate or something) and I would have a veritable treasure trove of amusements for him. Then I would have pieced them out as needed for the duration of the call.

I also would have endeavored to take him outside for 2 hours. I would have literally run his little legs off so that by 10:45 he could barely keep his eyes open and by 11 he would be out like a light.

I also would have called every single friend I had to get someone over to my house OR even hired a sitter from Care.com.

I think you had a lot of options. I don't think you exercised any of them.

[Anonymous]

I think most bosses would be sympathetic in this instance ONCE. But now you have to be very careful not to let a similar incident again, or you will look unprofessional and your boss might question whether you can balance work/home.

For your own sanity, you do need to start teaching this child to play independently and nondestructively.

[Anonymous]

Maybe this is beside the point but OP you realize that it's not normal that a 2 year old can't occupy himself for a short period without destroying things and/or injuring himself, right? I have a child with autism and a child with ADHD and this sounds extreme even to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe this is beside the point but OP you realize that it's not normal that a 2 year old can't occupy himself for a short period without destroying things and/or injuring himself, right? I have a child with autism and a child with ADHD and this sounds extreme even to me.

Op here - sorry I wasn’t clear. Child is not 2 yet. He turns 2 soon. And he can occupy himself for like 5-10 mins? I was on a 30+ minute call. There is no way I would leave him unattended for that long in another room.

[Anonymous]

I still remember the jerk who told me to shut my baby up when I did a radio interview with a newborn at home. That was 17 years ago and there wasn't a f-ing pandemic underway.

OP, I get your angst, I have spent my career trying to ensure my kids aren't *seen* as a factor in my capabilities (even though they always have been, by my choice!) But stuff happens, especially right now. I manage 75 people now and if this happened to someone on a call with me, I would only have sympathy and respect for them. Hugs to you and your child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Clearly you just want to complain and make excuses.

This is very cringe behavior. This pandemic has been going on this child's entire life - surely you have had time to come up with backup plans? If you have truly no child-safe space to put your kid in this type of situation, you only have yourself to blame.

Not the OP, but this comment is just cringe behavior.

But, seriously, if you haven't invested in a soundproof child dungeon at this point, can you even call yourself a professional?

+1. Lol. One soundproof dungeon for each kid, plus a spare, in case something breaks and someone can hear your kid. Anything else is “cringe.”

[Anonymous]

OP is your child no longer in a crib? Our 2 year old does an hour of quiet time in his crib every morning and even if he’s not always “quiet” we can just leave him in there with toys to play since he can’t hurt himself in there and is contained. While it’s not the best, when my husband was quarantined sometimes I had to just put our two year old in his crib, shut the door, and watch him on the monitor while I did my calls and meetings. Even if he yelled and screamed the whole time he’s safe in there and it’s what had to happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel your pain, but very unprofessional. (I have a 6month old, 3 year old and 5 year old)

Typically what I do is work super hard to occupy them while my meeting goes on. Ipad, snacks, candy (if needed!), nap time and I lock myself in a different room.

OP here - there is absolutely no way I could do any of the items listed above. It was an 11am meeting so nap was out. DS is not even 2 yet (turns 2 in like 2 weeks) and won't watch a movie or TV to save my life. Candy would distract him for about 5 seconds while he wolfs it down. If I left him unsupervised he would probably kill himself or severely injury himself. Not exaggerating. I have never had a kid who got into things this much and I have 3 of them.

It was very unfortunate. You did nothing wrong, OP.

[Anonymous]

I am a Director. I would have rescheduled the meeting if my staff member was going to be mentally MIA. I probably also would suggest they use PTO because they are not working while watching a toddler.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a zoom meeting today with my boss' boss - so our director and a consultant. Of course today is the day that my youngest (2 years old) is home due to a possible COVID exposure and couldn't go to daycare. DH was also on an important 4 hour work call and couldn't help during my call. So I took the call with son in lap and tried to pay attention and also distract said kid during the 30 minute call. Of course DS ended up having a screaming fit in the middle (that I put on mute) and I had to go take care of. On a scale of 1 to 10 how unprofessional is this? There was literally nothing else I could do. Meeting was scheduled a few weeks out and director is super busy so trying to re-schedule would have been a nightmare.

We are in unprecedented times. But, I do think it was extremely unprofessional of you not to advise your boss' boss and the consultant of your dilemma and let them decide as to whether to proceed or reschedule. It was not your call to make. It was your boss' boss so you don't just show up with a baby. And, while I can appreciate that you were trying not to waste people's time, that is exactly what you did.

On a scale of 1-10, you were pretty close to a 10. And, you are wrong about there being nothing else for you to do. You could have advised them and let them choose whether to proceed. Instead, you unilaterally decided instead of allowing those two levels above you to make the decision that was properly theirs to make.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Clearly you just want to complain and make excuses.

This is very cringe behavior. This pandemic has been going on this child's entire life - surely you have had time to come up with backup plans? If you have truly no child-safe space to put your kid in this type of situation, you only have yourself to blame.

Not the OP, but this comment is just cringe behavior.

But, seriously, if you haven't invested in a soundproof child dungeon at this point, can you even call yourself a professional?

But, seriously, if you haven’t yet invested sleeping pills for kids at this point, can you even call yourself a professional?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you have a two year old with no safe place for him? That’s insane.

Op here - where would you put a 2 year old? Or strap them to what? I am confused.

DP. Mom of 7. You don't have a pac-n-play? You don't have a crib? You don't have a contained small room that is child safe with a baby gate set up?

I would have moved heaven and earth to reset my laptop and camera so that my kid was in a contained thing (aforesaid pac-n-play or crib or small room with baby gate or something) and I would have a veritable treasure trove of amusements for him. Then I would have pieced them out as needed for the duration of the call.

I also would have endeavored to take him outside for 2 hours. I would have literally run his little legs off so that by 10:45 he could barely keep his eyes open and by 11 he would be out like a light.

I also would have called every single friend I had to get someone over to my house OR even hired a sitter from Care.com.

I think you had a lot of options. I don't think you exercised any of them.

Dont listen to this lady- she has 7 kids. Clearly she has poor judgment and no self control.

Op- no one cares. If they felt you were unprofessional, that’s on them. Don’t hide your kids or put them in a baby dungeon. Covid exposures are a fact of life. Don’t feel bad and don’t give it a second thought.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a Director. I would have rescheduled the meeting if my staff member was going to be mentally MIA. I probably also would suggest they use PTO because they are not working while watching a toddler.

I am a Director. I would have offered to reschedule (and encouraged it given my boss) and would not have given a crap about whether you used PTO or not. We’re all doing what we can, here.

[Anonymous]

That was not a good look. I hate to say it, but they will probably remember that sight of you and DC looking unprepared and unprofessional. But what are you going to do? Don't worry about it, what's done is done.