Cotillion

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is an outdated southern tradition that most of the US, and the world, does not participate in. Find a manners class insteead

Speak for yourself. Something your mother should have taught you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are doing it for our boys. It’s not at all some kind of fancy high society event, just kids dressing up and going to a little party at the neighborhood event center. I like the classes because they do teach manners in a fun and engaging way and make it a social thing the kids look forward to. The little dance/cotillion is a fun excuse for the kids to dress up and feel fancy and grown up.

I would compare it more to confirmation classes and confirmation than some elaborate debutante ball.

Your boys are weird. Most normal boys would rather have a root canal than "dress up and go to a little party at the neighborhood event center."

I think in a manners class one can learn things like it’s rude to call kids weird!

A bunch of PPs here could themselves benefit from Cotillion.

Oh, please. You’re talking about kindness. Cotillion just teaches you to butter your bread one piece at a time.

I don’t have a problem with the food manners, but I do have a problem with the “manners” that are sexist and old school.

+1
As someone who fled the South, I would rather have someone without "manners" talk to me frankly and honestly than someone with "manners" being polite then stabbing me in the back.

[Anonymous]

Ah ducks, brings back memories of my debutant days in Baltimore. Married the first boy I kissed and then retired to a farmette in Glyndon. DD attended Garrison Forest, summers in Rehoboth. If I had the chance to do it all again I wouldn’t change a thing.

[Anonymous]

Cotillion is something white upper middle class parents send their cisgender kids to. Anyone who doesn’t fit this dynamic will feel out of place. That’s the problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is an outdated southern tradition that most of the US, and the world, does not participate in. Find a manners class insteead

Speak for yourself. Something your mother should have taught you.

Isn’t the purpose of cotillion that your mother doesn’t need to teach you stuff like this, the manners teacher does instead?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is an outdated southern tradition that most of the US, and the world, does not participate in. Find a manners class insteead

Speak for yourself. Something your mother should have taught you.

Et tu.

[Anonymous]

"Cisgender."

XX/XY but you do you.

See you on the other side of reality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cotillion is something white upper middle class parents send their cisgender kids to. Anyone who doesn’t fit this dynamic will feel out of place. That’s the problem.

Except all the black cotillions, which have been around since the 40s. Other than that, erm yes, you are still not knowledgeable. Perhaps you should be less judgey and learn from a quick Google search?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Cisgender."

XX/XY but you do you.

See you on the other side of reality.

XX/XY refers to sex chromosomes, not gender. That is reality, one side fits all.

When my kids were younger, some of their friends did cotillion, but my spouse (from the South) and I figured our children learn proper etiquette from us and their grandparents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cotillion is something white upper middle class parents send their cisgender kids to. Anyone who doesn’t fit this dynamic will feel out of place. That’s the problem.

Except all the black cotillions, which have been around since the 40s. Other than that, erm yes, you are still not knowledgeable. Perhaps you should be less judgey and learn from a quick Google search?

There were black kids at my cotillion in middle school and today there is a significant number of children of color (all colors)and several of my black friends who live there send their kids to that same cotillion which still is in existence. And I am from, are you ready for this....Richmond.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s not something I’d ever put my kids in. I can’t believe how many “woke” parents put their kids in it (looking at you arlington).

Do you even know what "woke" means? There is nothing woke about cotillion.

[Anonymous]

I used to threaten my kids with cotillion any time they showed particularly crappy manners. It worked great.

[Anonymous]

I find it entertaining that so many of those criticizing cotillion as something parents should be teaching, probably also worked with their kids in the pool while also signing them up for swim lessons.

What's the big deal? Outside reinforcements can be helpful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find it entertaining that so many of those criticizing cotillion as something parents should be teaching, probably also worked with their kids in the pool while also signing them up for swim lessons.

What's the big deal? Outside reinforcements can be helpful.

Well, learning to swim is fairly straightforward and universal. Learning "manners" is far more specific to a family culture/values. The cotillion near me is all about ladies and gentlemen in a country club setting and is not what I think is important to emphasize. Hence, it's a lot harder to successfully outsource the teaching of manners than swimming.

[Anonymous]

It's not for us. My son has a lot of activities, between sports and band and clubs at school. He's not interested in dancing or going on dates at this point, so this is not something we'd try to squeeze in with his other obligations. If it works for some other family, good for them.