MCPS class assignments

[Anonymous]

Long story short - we have had a disastrous family incident last summer, and during the school year my daughter was put in a class where both of her really good friends were in a different section. We didnt request the school to help her as she thought she can try to make new friends. All year we struggled with making new friends as girls would not allow her to either sit with them or even play with them. it was brutal. I almost thought of home schooling her. we some how got through it all. In the Spring this year, we had put in a request to assign her to the same class as atleast one of her friends, and even her class teacher from 2017-18 school year put in a recommedation that she needs to be with her friends, so she can focus on her studies, instead of figuring out where, what and how each and every day. Her friend's parents put in a request to be assigned to the same class as our daughter.

Nope, this year, same situation. I called the principal, and he is adamant that it is important for a student to go out of their boxes, be more creative in making new friends, we cannot change the assignment, too many variables in assigning a class to a student etc. I totally understand that, and requested on a humanitarian grounds to think about it again, and I explained how difficult it was last year, and that we are hoping she will not be depressed again. No, he is not budging.

I am looking for some recommendations as to how to handle this situation. my daughter refuses to go to school this year. I'd really appreciate if any of you have any thoughts, recommendations etc.
we are in germantown/boyds area.

[Anonymous]

I would put things in writing - not a call - and use the terms bullying and concern about your kid's physical and psychological safety. This will put some pressure on the principal and will give you the record to escalate things, either before or after the school year starts.

[Anonymous]

Two thoughts you could try. You may need to do both because both can overlap.

1) Has your child been evaluated for a disability? Get the teacher recommendation in writing. An email with her opinion would be sufficient. Then send a letter with the teacher recommendation as an attachment asking for an IEP meeting to determine if your child has a disability that needs accommodations and/or special education services.

The school will be required to have an IEP meeting within 30 days. Accommodations would include the classroom placement option. Special education services would include learning appropriate social skills. This process would gather a team to relook qt the data and needs of the child.

2) If bullying and being ostracized by other children is the root problem, file the MCPS bullying and harassment form. As a remedy, ask for your child to be placed in the classroom with a friend.

[Anonymous]

The IEP letter should go to the principal

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would put things in writing - not a call - and use the terms bullying and concern about your kid's physical and psychological safety. This will put some pressure on the principal and will give you the record to escalate things, either before or after the school year starts.

What OP described isn’t bullying.

[Anonymous]

You should be talking to the school counselor, if you haven't already been. They can advocate for a change of setting for your daughter.

[Anonymous]

On the (good) chance that they won't switch her classes, my recommendation is that you throw a great party in the first few weeks of school. Invite all the girls from the new class (and any others you would like). I had a girl who wasn't good at making friends, but as soon as her birthday party took place, all the girls were seeking her out at recess, etc. Plus she got a lot of reciprocal invites.

You can also plan some formal playdates after school each day with the old friends so that she has some good time with them each day.

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand this principal. Your daughter spent a year outside her comfort zone and had a really tough year. Why does he we want to subject her to that again instead of equipping her to have a better year?? When the other parents and the teacher are all in agreement? I like the idea of enlisting the counselor, and maybe if your child has seen a therapist outside of school that person could also weigh in.

Does your daughter have anyone she likes in this upcoming class? The idea to throw a party is a good one. We were thinking of doing something similar because DC is starting at a new school. Keep us posted, OP.

[Anonymous]

How do you already have your class assignment? Our school is still making changes and we won't get it until the afternoon of the 29th. Seems odd it would be set in stone when the teachers aren't even back yet. i know our school is still getting new registrations every day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would put things in writing - not a call - and use the terms bullying and concern about your kid's physical and psychological safety. This will put some pressure on the principal and will give you the record to escalate things, either before or after the school year starts.

absolutely do this. teachers should know better than to allow this to happen. they should be teaching INCLUSIVITY and do some social engineering with the seating charts, eating charts, etc and be changing them around each quarter.

try more playdates and activities/camps/events out of class with other girls too. what age is she?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would put things in writing - not a call - and use the terms bullying and concern about your kid's physical and psychological safety. This will put some pressure on the principal and will give you the record to escalate things, either before or after the school year starts.

absolutely do this. teachers should know better than to allow this to happen. they should be teaching INCLUSIVITY and do some social engineering with the seating charts, eating charts, etc and be changing them around each quarter.

try more playdates and activities/camps/events out of class with other girls too. what age is she?

OP here. She is 10. MCPS already sent out teacher and room assignments.
We did talk to the councelor last year to find if they can do anything. But nothing happend. I will send an email again to the teachers and the principal formally. And I guess file a complain with the bullying. We tried all these last year. You would think they would do everything possible to help children, but we also have understand it is another day at job for them too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would put things in writing - not a call - and use the terms bullying and concern about your kid's physical and psychological safety. This will put some pressure on the principal and will give you the record to escalate things, either before or after the school year starts.

What OP described isn’t bullying.

Some of what she described absolutely could be considered bullying. And OP wanted suggestions on how to approach things. Using certain "magic words" will help get the school's attention, in part because greater liability could attach if something happens down the road that the school was warned about and ignored.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would put things in writing - not a call - and use the terms bullying and concern about your kid's physical and psychological safety. This will put some pressure on the principal and will give you the record to escalate things, either before or after the school year starts.

absolutely do this. teachers should know better than to allow this to happen. they should be teaching INCLUSIVITY and do some social engineering with the seating charts, eating charts, etc and be changing them around each quarter.

try more playdates and activities/camps/events out of class with other girls too. what age is she?

OP here. She is 10. MCPS already sent out teacher and room assignments.
We did talk to the councelor last year to find if they can do anything. But nothing happend. I will send an email again to the teachers and the principal formally. And I guess file a complain with the bullying. We tried all these last year. You would think they would do everything possible to help children, but we also have understand it is another day at job for them too.

Honestly I'm surprised to hear that they don't seem to want to work with you at all. I'm sorry about that OP -- hope you find a way to get through to them.

[Anonymous]

How many classes are there in her grade level? Even though she may not be with her best friends, she may not be with the girls who weren't inclusive last year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How many classes are there in her grade level? Even though she may not be with her best friends, she may not be with the girls who weren't inclusive last year.

OP
2 classes at 5th grade level