Is it wrong for my husband to go after business from someone he's attracted to?

[Anonymous]

My husband owns a company and is always networking. Long story short...last week, we ran into a woman he hadn't seen in awhile at an event. Her face lit up when she saw my husband and he was visibly uncomfortable and eventually introduced me to her (even though he could not remember her name). I felt so uncomfortable standing there watching the two of them fumble around that I confronted him about the awkwardness later and he admitted that he was attracted to her and that he had invited her to some other networking events and to his office to possibly do some work together. The work never panned out. My question is, is it wrong for my husband to choose to reach out to someone for business when he is attracted to them?

[Anonymous]

Um, this sounds very shady. They were fumbling around each other? You clearly stumbled upon his AP. Sorry.

[Anonymous]

Something has already happened between them.

[Anonymous]

Google for “trickle truth” and affairs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Something has already happened between them.

+100.

Please ask him. Stay calm and tell him he has one chance to come clean. If you find out he is lying then forgiveness may not be possible.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband owns a company and is always networking. Long story short...last week, we ran into a woman he hadn't seen in awhile at an event. Her face lit up when she saw my husband and he was visibly uncomfortable and eventually introduced me to her (even though he could not remember her name). I felt so uncomfortable standing there watching the two of them fumble around that I confronted him about the awkwardness later and he admitted that he was attracted to her and that he had invited her to some other networking events and to his office to possibly do some work together. The work never panned out. My question is, is it wrong for my husband to choose to reach out to someone for business when he is attracted to them?

He remembers her name. He was caught flat footed and initially did not want to out her with her real name in front of you.

[Anonymous]

How did she react to being introduced to you? Did he really not remember her name?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband owns a company and is always networking. Long story short...last week, we ran into a woman he hadn't seen in awhile at an event. Her face lit up when she saw my husband and he was visibly uncomfortable and eventually introduced me to her (even though he could not remember her name). I felt so uncomfortable standing there watching the two of them fumble around that I confronted him about the awkwardness later and he admitted that he was attracted to her and that he had invited her to some other networking events and to his office to possibly do some work together. The work never panned out. My question is, is it wrong for my husband to choose to reach out to someone for business when he is attracted to them?

He remembers her name. He was caught flat footed and initially did not want to out her with her real name in front of you.

Yeah, it’s highly unlikely that he forgot her name. Especially if it’s his business to network.

[gentry]

Could she actually have been a flame from before -being with you?

[Anonymous]

To think - her marriage ruined because of one awkward introduction/interaction and the awful advice of anonymous "relationship experts" on the event who are only expert at contriving all types of conspiracy theories.

Sigh...good luck with your divorce OP

[Anonymous]

OP here.
I know he definitely did not remember her name and no, he only met her recently so there wasn't any previous history. He met her at a happy hour and then at that happy hour, he invited her to a different networking event. They stayed in touch, met at more networking events, and then they arranged to possibly do some work together and she came to the office to discuss the project which never panned out. Couple other facts. I knew about none of this (not like he really had any reason to tell me, I guess) and she's married too.

[Anonymous]

Doesn't mean something already happened, but there likely are some sparks. This happened to me early in my marriage. I confronted DH (relatively) calmly and we straightened it out.

[Anonymous]

I don't think it's a big deal. You can't really expect a business owner to turn down work because the client is attractive.

[Anonymous]

Is it wrong for my husband to go after business from someone he's attracted to?

Doesn't violate any code of ethics and business conduct that I know of.
Since when does being attracted to someone mean you can't do business with them?
Who does that?

Car salesman: "Oh wow look at that lady on the lot - well I guess someone else will be getting the commission I'm attracted to her so I can't get her business."
Real Estate Agent: "Oh wow that guy interested in a new home is so hot - guess I'll have to refer him to another realtor since I can't do business with him because I find him attractive."
Doctor: "Sir I'm afraid I can't be your primary care physician because you're incredibly handsome."
Lawyer: "Your honor I cannot in good conscience represent my client because her legs are absolutely gorgeous."

Never heard any such instances in my life.

[Anonymous]

Totally different scenarios.

Op described a situation where her husband and the woman were thinking:

Woman: so happy to see this guy!
Husband: oh shit she’s here. What do I say?
Woman: is that his wife?
Husband: am I going to have to introduce them? Maybe I pretend that I don’t know her?
Both: damn I hope I can stay cool and not give anything away.