Ask me anything: I am a kept woman

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

How the heck do you know that? There *are* women out there, even in their twenties, who know that they absolutely do not want to have children. So they date unavailable men or divorced men with children.

All the women (and men) that I know who do not want children date other men (and women) who also do not want children.

The only ones I know who date unavailable men are those who have low self-esteem. You know, like the OP.

So you do *know* some of these women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

She already said she didn't want to because she doesn't want kids.

She said that as a way to save face, nothing more: "Of course he would marry me, except that I don't want kids so he was stuck marrying a frigid woman who did."

A frigid woman who only has sex because that's what she has to do to get babies. Lol.

Not unheard of, PP. Especially if it started after she had the kids. Go to the relationship forum and listen to the complaints of women who have lost interest in sex and men complaining their wives don't want to have sex after having children.

Maybe that happens. But remember that this whole thing started up between Op and this guy before he even got married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Honestly, the reason why you are getting so much shit and "advise' is because all of these women live in fear of their men leaving them - you are their worst nightmare.

Haha. Nice try, but married men rarely leave their wives for their skanks.

Maybe not, but married men do realize that someone will appreciate them if their wives don't. So they may not leave FOR the other woman, but they do leave for themselves and then start dating someone with a sweeter disposition.

[Anonymous]

Nope, I wrote the above and I am for sure not OP. First time adding something on this thread. Also, to the above, I didn't say that the skank wins here, I'm just saying everyone on the attack on this board must feel vulnerable in some way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
She has a somewhat formalized pecuniary relationship with her guy. Many, many women go after an affluent professional for the same reason. You may not have done so but it would be naive to think that is not the motivation of many women especially in this town.

And many men choose to *marry* them anyway. Please don't equate married couples with what the Op is doing. It isn't the same thing. At all. Op's boyfriend already has a wife and it ain't her.

So if the guy who is providing for OP were not married, it would change your opinion of her? Fault the husband by all means but don't blame the OP for doing what millions of women do when they marry a guy because he has money. Not just in the US but pretty much all over the world.

If Op was just single and just sitting back and letting her rich boyfriend support her, I think that would be unwise. He could dump her tomorrow and where would she be? If Op was married to the guy and they, as a committed couple, decided that it would be best for Op to stay home that would be a team decision on both of their parts.

And if the wife decided that she did not want to work because she would rather stay at home although she has no children because her husband can provide for the sort of lifestyle she expects that would make her a ......... by your definition?

If the wife decided unilaterally (without her husband's agreement) that she was not going to work and live off her husband's income, that would make her a very poor team player and would quite possibly be grounds for divorce.

A poor team player? Hmm, we have a lot of poor team players in this country. Though in actual fact, OP's relationship with her guy is basically the same without the marriage certificate.

We have lots of divorces, too. Not an option the married boyfriend chooses, though.

[Anonymous]

So you do *know* some of these women.

Of course. You don't live to be 54 years old without meeting people from all walks of life.

[Anonymous]

everyone on the attack on this board must feel vulnerable in some way.

Very few of the responses here have been in "attack" mode. Most have been in disbelief, and rightfully so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, did you expect so much uproar, detective work, and judgment when you originally posted here? Honestly, the reason why you are getting so much shit and "advise' is because all of these women live in fear of their men leaving them - you are their worst nightmare.

I am in my early thirties and am not married (why I am here on this forum is really not important.) While I have not attacked OP or called her a prostitute, I do think she is naive and has some issues. I am not threatened by her (no husband to steal, so doesn't hit close to home...)

I think women who choose to be "The Other Woman" are fascinating, even in my young self-destructive days I would have never done this. Most people I know would have more of a moral compass and would also not do this. Not that I don't believe this happens, just interested in learning the baggage that causes these types of relationships and what happened to these people to lead them to this point.

I was young, I was naive and expected the better of people in my 20's. I have been manipulated by a man who I never thought would be capable of the lies he told. Part of my fascination is in part I think OP will look back on this time with regret... maybe she won't but I think if things were to come out, if there were drama that she didn't foresee (that most of us do reading this thread!) If her man's children knew who she was and that she was the reason dad missed X,Y,Z she might feel differently. Then again maybe she won't that is why it is kinda interesting in that train wreck kinda way were you can't look away!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Honestly, the reason why you are getting so much shit and "advise' is because all of these women live in fear of their men leaving them - you are their worst nightmare.

Haha. Nice try, but married men rarely leave their wives for their skanks.

Maybe not, but married men do realize that someone will appreciate them if their wives don't. So they may not leave FOR the other woman, but they do leave for themselves and then start dating someone with a sweeter disposition.

And, alas, even if he does leave his wife, there is a fairer, sweeter lass in store for him. One that would never sully herself by having an affair with a married man, no doubt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Honestly, the reason why you are getting so much shit and "advise' is because all of these women live in fear of their men leaving them - you are their worst nightmare.

Haha. Nice try, but married men rarely leave their wives for their skanks.

Maybe not, but married men do realize that someone will appreciate them if their wives don't. So they may not leave FOR the other woman, but they do leave for themselves and then start dating someone with a sweeter disposition.

And, alas, even if he does leave his wife, there is a fairer, sweeter lass in store for him. One that would never sully herself by having an affair with a married man, no doubt.

Not necessarily. Enough women on this forum have admitted to affairs that chances are he'll just marry one that never tells him that she had a hot and heavy final semester fling with the journalism professor.

[Anonymous]

There is something about most men that draws them to younger women and sometimes much younger women.

It is the reason why successful men often dump their first wife and hitch up with a new model. Sometimes it happens even with women who cannot be faulted for not being a good wife.

[Anonymous]

everyone on the attack on this board must feel vulnerable in some way

Yep, that's it. Because there would be no other reason whatsoever for people to be against this except that they are insecure and vulnerable. Yep.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

she did not get us "all riled up".

46 pages in 28 hours? Oh, I think we're riled up....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

everyone on the attack on this board must feel vulnerable in some way

Yep, that's it. Because there would be no other reason whatsoever for people to be against this except that they are insecure and vulnerable. Yep.

You may not be, PP but seriously when there are this many responses in a 24 hour period it goes beyond mere curiosity and disapproval. How many threads have you known that have evoked this sort of response in such a short time period?

[Anonymous]

OP, if you get pregnant you will become a threat to him and he will drop you like a hot potato. What's your buyoff number? How much will he have to pay you to have an abortion? Because the moment you get knocked up (and you will), is the moment the gravy train stops. So what's your number?