Would you let your 13 year old travel internationally with another family for a month?

[Anonymous]

DS 13 will be a freshman next year.

He has a good friend whose parents are from China and his friend and his mother go to China to visit family every summer.
They have invited DS to go with them—it would be a month long trip including Shanghai, another large city in China, and a week in Japan while the mom attends a professional conference.

The boys made a presentation with an itinerary (visiting family, historical and cultural sites, amusement parks, etc.). We had been thinking he was too young for a big trip like this without a parent but it really does seem like it would be a great experience. Of he doesn’t go this summer he could probably go in a year or two, and I’m thinking that he might get more out of it when he’s older. He has never travelled internationally before.

Thoughts? Anything we should consider? It will probably be around $3000.

[Anonymous]

This would be a form of torture for my kid. So no.

Is your kid an adventurous eater? Has he ever done sleepaway camp? Can you afford it?

I agree it’s an amazing opportunity and I don’t think he’s too young to appreciate it.

[Anonymous]

Sounds great! Absolutely

[Anonymous]

No way!

[Anonymous]

I would not let my 13 year old go to a developing country for even a day, let alone a month, without one of us there.

[Anonymous]

If my son had considerable experience being away from home for long stretches (like a month at sleeapaway camp) and was very adventurous and confident I would probably say yes provided this was a very good friend, I knew the parent very well and we had a plan for checking in. This doesn’t describe my 13 year old though so I would have to say no. My own son has only been away for 1 week at a time and has never traveled outside N America. He’s just really not all that independent.

I actually know someone who sent their 13 yo DD to China solo to spend a summer with family. It sounded crazy at the time but she had a wonderful time and the trip was a complete success. But she spoke the language and they were her relatives.

[Anonymous]

No

[Anonymous]

My husband spent time when he was a young teen with his best friend’s Chinese family for six weeks in China. It was a wonderful experience for him. It sparked an interest (and career) in Asia. Only you know how we your child will handle the potential culture shock, the reliance on the family for communication, being far from friends and family and the familiar. For some kids this is possible, others are not ready. He should be prepared for some potentially tough days and possibly feeling a bit isolated. Getting a child interested in Asia is a huge plus. It’s the future.

[Anonymous]

No

[Anonymous]

If my relationship with the other family was excellent, and I trusted/ liked their parenting.

Yes

[Anonymous]

What does your spouse think, OP?

[Anonymous]

Yes, yes, yes! What an unbelievable opportunity to see part of the world with people who know it well.

[Anonymous]

As long as you trust the parents, I absolutely would. My 13 year old would love it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This would be a form of torture for my kid. So no.

Is your kid an adventurous eater? Has he ever done sleepaway camp? Can you afford it?

I agree it’s an amazing opportunity and I don’t think he’s too young to appreciate it.

A form of torture for the family.

[Anonymous]

Even though it's a great opportunity, I'd think he's a little too young.