Would you let your 13 year old travel internationally with another family for a month?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the opportunity will be there in 2 years then I would wait. He will certainly get more from the experience if he’s older and you will have more time to build his independence and make personal arrangements.

You don't need two years to make arrangements for a one month trip. And there is no way to know if the kids will be friends in two years, or if any of them will still be living here. You have to take opportunities when they present themselves, not hope they stick around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, because of medical care in case of an emergency and potential language issues (does your son speak any Chinese?). It is simply a very long time, and he is not that unlikely to get sick (the family will be more used to the bugs over there so may not be as careful as a tourist would be). I would say yes to France, Germany, the UK etc.

Do you think he'd not have language issues in Germany? Does your kid speak German or French? Do you have any idea how few French speak even passable English?

[Anonymous]

no

[Anonymous]

If you know the parents and like them, I'd say yes, absolutely.

I lived in China for five years after college.

I'd make sure he had his Hepatitis A immunization and let him go!

If his family is here, I am sure they are educated and are not poor. In general, parents are more protective of kids in China than they are here. And they're taking on a huge responsibility taking your son, so they must feel confident. I would let him go, if it's a good friend. I'm sure it will be hard at times (culture shock, and just missing your family, same as with a sleepaway camp.) But it will also be amazing, and broaden his world view, and his sense of his own place in the world. If he put the presentation together with his friend, that shows a great deal of interest and motivation on his part that I'd respect.

Yes, if it were my kid I'd be paranoid (about things like traffic accidents) but I'd be worried about things like that if my kid went with someone else to somewhere in the US for a month too.

[Anonymous]

It sounds pretty awesome. I would just make sure to have a back up plan in case my kid wasn’t coping and needed a way out-could you afford to go get him and/or would he be ok coming home on his own?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS 13 will be a freshman next year.

He has a good friend whose parents are from China and his friend and his mother go to China to visit family every summer.
They have invited DS to go with them—it would be a month long trip including Shanghai, another large city in China, and a week in Japan while the mom attends a professional conference.

The boys made a presentation with an itinerary (visiting family, historical and cultural sites, amusement parks, etc.). We had been thinking he was too young for a big trip like this without a parent but it really does seem like it would be a great experience. Of he doesn’t go this summer he could probably go in a year or two, and I’m thinking that he might get more out of it when he’s older. He has never travelled internationally before.

Thoughts? Anything we should consider? It will probably be around $3000.

If the boy is willing and had the maturity to make a presentation, AND the other family is willing to parent your child for a month.... YOU HAVE HIT THE JACKPOT!!! This is a fabulous opportunity -- better than any summer camp! I think this will work out as long as you trust the other parent and they know that you expect them to actually parent your child (i.e. stop him from doing bad things). Jackpot.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I would let my 13 years old travel internationally and we had done so before , both for field trips beginning at the age of 11 and to travel with friends.

No, I would not let my 13 years old to travel to China. Too many things that can possibly go wrong there with american kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would let my 13 years old travel internationally and we had done so before , both for field trips beginning at the age of 11 and to travel with friends.

No, I would not let my 13 years old to travel to China. Too many things that can possibly go wrong there with american kid.

Name one specific thing that could go wrong in China with an American kid.

[Anonymous]

I would wait a year or two. What’s the down side to waiting?

[Anonymous]

Yes-sounds like an amazing opportunity. Having a family show him the country is such a wonderful way to see thecountry and tge fact that he is interested will make it all the better. Say yes!
I let my 14yo do a semester abroad as part of a sister-city opportunity. She had nothing like the safeguards you have with not only a traveling family but in-country relatives. She was a little homesick at some points but it overall was a great experience and she credits it for her getting over her shyness

[Anonymous]

Does your DC have any upper respiratory issues or food allergies? Date of last TDap booster? Japanese encephalitis vaccine? Rabies vaccine?
I would track the AirQ indices and pack plenty of N95 disposable masks. Once the pollution settles into your lungs you are more susceptible to illness in general.
You will need to apply for the detailed and expensive China visa too.

[Anonymous]

I would absolutely let my kid go.

So many worry warts here.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I would.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No
Your DS is way over estimating what being away from home and being taken care of by parents is like. Yes, he will be with their family but culturally that will be very different and he will be alone while his friend understands the language and culture and won’t have the same issues. The mom will parent her DS but she won’t really want to deal and parent yours and I promise she is expecting him to act and be like an adult. You could ask the family for a trial run and have your DS stay with them for a whole week 24/7. If they ball, think about the fact they are saying they would love to have him 24/7 for a month. How do think that is going to work if they can’t even do a week in the US?

Yes acknowledge to your DS how great this sounds, but reinforce what sounds great on paper doesn’t come to fruition and every before trip presentation is perfect and every actual trip is full of bumps and snags never seen on the presentation.

Or it could go amazingly and he could have a great trip and have an experience that leads to a love of world travel.

I grew up in a family that allowed us to explore and to be independent. We kids traveled extensively, often without adults - most of you would probably report my parents to CPS. It was a wonderful life - led to years more of global exploration. I would say thought that since my parents valued independence - they taught us how to be independent and responsible at a young age. We weren't sheltered, helicoptered kids shoved out into the big world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would absolutely let my kid go.

So many worry warts here.

+1. We lived in a "developing" country and my BIL and SIL wouldn't let our nephews come visit us. Our kids were so disappointed and it would have been an amazing experience for them. It's years later and I'm still sad... I would absolutely let my kids do that as long as I trusted the family to parent well in our absence.