DS hiding food again!

[Anonymous]

I discovered DS hiding food again today, despite having gotten into trouble for it on numerous prior occasions. I’m freaked out because doing sneaky things with food seems like a one way ticket to an eating disorder. Has anyone successfully dealt with this?

[Anonymous]

Are you restricting his diet? Is he overweight? Why does he feel the need to hide food?

[Anonymous]

Can you give a little more info? My DS “hides” food in his room that he doesn’t want anyone else to eat, like the candy he got in his Xmas stocking. Or something he’s too lazy to return to the kitchen. It’s nothing concerning to me, but I’m not sure if your DS has exhibited signs of an eating disorder in the past?

[Anonymous]

He’s not overweight, and he’s welcome to eat anything in the kitchen/pantry. There’s always food around that requires little effort in the way of prep. But it isn’t crappy junk food. He buys or is gifted junk food (including by his g’parents, which is a whole other issue) that, instead of just consuming, he brings home and hides. Unfortunately for him, we have a food-motivated dog who always finds it. Then the dog is sick from eating human junk food, and DS is in trouble again. It used to be worse, and then it was always candy. We went a couple of years without many issues, but now that he can walk out of school at the end of the day and into a convenience store, we have issues again.

DS gets an allowance, and I’ve told him that he’s in MS, and I expect he will sometimes eat junk food with his friends. I would prefer that he at least opt for say the pretzels or the candy bar with nuts rather than a soda, but I don’t pretend I can micromanage those choices. He knows he is not allowed to hide it in the house, though.

While we don’t keep junk food in the house, we have treats occasionally. We have dessert after dinner about once a week. When we’re out and about, we’ll sometimes have a treat like ice cream. DS also goes to starbucks with me 1-2 per week after walking the dog.

Should I take away his allowance? Make him go to after school care like a little kid? He has to learn to manage his freedom (and money), but I am so sick of the sneaky food bs.

[Anonymous]

OP, what are you most upset about?

That he is eating crap junk food, or that he is hiding it from you?

He isn't hiding food from you, for some weird, eating disorder related reason. He is hiding junk food from you, because he knows you don't approve of the junk food. He is keeping it in his room, because you do not allow it in your kitchen.

If you want him to stop hiding this food in his room, allow him to keep it in the kitchen pantry. You don't have to buy it for him, just let him keep his food there and don't comment on it.

Also, find some junk food that he likes, that you can marginally tolerate. Buy that. Keep it in the pantry where he can get it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, what are you most upset about?

That he is eating crap junk food, or that he is hiding it from you?

He isn't hiding food from you, for some weird, eating disorder related reason. He is hiding junk food from you, because he knows you don't approve of the junk food. He is keeping it in his room, because you do not allow it in your kitchen.

If you want him to stop hiding this food in his room, allow him to keep it in the kitchen pantry. You don't have to buy it for him, just let him keep his food there and don't comment on it.

Also, find some junk food that he likes, that you can marginally tolerate. Buy that. Keep it in the pantry where he can get it.

Agreed. OP, you sound like the one with food issues. Relax a little. If anything is giving him food issues it's all this angst over "junk food". You are seriosuly thinking of sending him to after care to stop him from buying junk food? He isn't "hiding" the food. He's probably saving it to have another time but has no where to store it without getting the judgy-eye.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He is keeping it in his room because you do not allow it in your kitchen.

If you want him to stop hiding this food in his room, allow him to keep it in the kitchen pantry.

Pretty simple really. Or just don't let him eat or buy it at all.

[Anonymous]

I used to eat junk food in secret, outside the house, and not tell my mother because she was a "no junk food EVER" type of person.

But hiding food in the house is disgusting because it attracts vermin and it's a health issue for the dog. I don't understand why your son doesn't get this. You're not even restricting his access to junk. You're being eminently reasonable!

I would stop a privilege (whichever one you want) AND make him clean up after the dog.

[Anonymous]

Pretzels are special junk food to you?

[Anonymous]

Of the dog can get it, he’s not doing a very good job of hiding it.

[Anonymous]

*If* the dog can get it...

[Anonymous]

My DD hides food even though we allow it to an extent. We just want all food to be eaten downstairs...or at the very least toss your trash down stairs. Nope I find it tucked away in her room. The food comes from our house so unrelated to parent control. No answers.

[Anonymous]

Teens want some control over their lives, and for some, food is it. You won't be able to control "no junk food", so if you want to reduce the sneakiness, you should discuss it with your DS and agree on something reasonable. If there is no one else who will eat his food, set up a place in the pantry where he can store it. If he's taking it to his room to hide it from siblings - see if some sort of sealed container out of the dog's reach will work to keep it "safe" but not a hazard. Find a way to support his growing independence, while still managing the most important things to you (keeping the dog from getting sick, keeping the house clean.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teens want some control over their lives, and for some, food is it. You won't be able to control "no junk food", so if you want to reduce the sneakiness, you should discuss it with your DS and agree on something reasonable. If there is no one else who will eat his food, set up a place in the pantry where he can store it. If he's taking it to his room to hide it from siblings - see if some sort of sealed container out of the dog's reach will work to keep it "safe" but not a hazard. Find a way to support his growing independence, while still managing the most important things to you (keeping the dog from getting sick, keeping the house clean.)

+1

[Anonymous]

I would take him to the grocery store and let him pick all the junk food he wants and have him eat it all in one day and finish it all. He will most likely feel sick and never want to touch it again.