Living at home while attending nearby college

[Anonymous]

Does anyone have this situation? Would be good to hear from people for whom it works and how. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

The kids miss out on so much living at home, but it depends if you value that dorm experience.

[Anonymous]

We know a few. Some start at NOVA and proceed to GMU. They do need transportation of some kind. They are active in one or two clubs for their social life. They kept their summer jobs and just went part time. However, most of my DCs’ friends live on campus even if it is very close by (like GMU and they live in Fairfax City).

One we know lived in the dorm for the first two years at American and then when he could get his scduel down to 2 or 3 days lived at home and commuted for his classes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The kids miss out on so much living at home, but it depends if you value that dorm experience.

and the money situation

[Anonymous]

We have done both with our kids. I don't think it made any difference socially or academically. Kids catch up with friends regardless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The kids miss out on so much living at home, but it depends if you value that dorm experience.

I was a commuter student. I had plenty of the dorm experience, because my friends lived in them. I was so happy to not have to sleep in a shared cell!

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the replies. We would be looking to do this mostly for financial reasons but also because my kid would never want to share a bedroom with anyone and its hard to find colleges where singles are the norm - often you need some kind of special circumstances to qualify for that.

[Anonymous]

I commuted to school, had friends who lived in dorms. We weren't into dorm culture. I don't feel like I missed out on anything. Its a very "American" idea to live in a dorm. I loved my college time but its because I worked a lot, made money, hung out in the city and also went to classes. I liked not having my whole life centered around college. SOme semesters I spent a lot of time in the library other semesters not so much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the replies. We would be looking to do this mostly for financial reasons but also because my kid would never want to share a bedroom with anyone and its hard to find colleges where singles are the norm - often you need some kind of special circumstances to qualify for that.

There's usually a certain distance you can live within to stay off campus as a freshman. I had friends who did this and hated it. Most of them moved on campus for sophomore and junior years, but I think it would depend on the atmosphere at the school.

Part of me wants to tell you that sharing a room builds character, but I absolutely did not get a long with my freshman roommate - we were not well matched.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the replies. We would be looking to do this mostly for financial reasons but also because my kid would never want to share a bedroom with anyone and its hard to find colleges where singles are the norm - often you need some kind of special circumstances to qualify for that.

There's usually a certain distance you can live within to stay off campus as a freshman. I had friends who did this and hated it. Most of them moved on campus for sophomore and junior years, but I think it would depend on the atmosphere at the school.

Part of me wants to tell you that sharing a room builds character, but I absolutely did not get a long with my freshman roommate - we were not well matched.

OP here. I have my own experience of sharing rooms - in European boarding school. And I can tell you there is nothing character building about it and everything bad. My UK university had mostly single bedrooms - doubles were RARE - so I was fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The kids miss out on so much living at home, but it depends if you value that dorm experience.

I was a commuter student. I had plenty of the dorm experience, because my friends lived in them. I was so happy to not have to sleep in a shared cell!

Some would argue the experience of having a roommate and otherwise managing your life in a dorm (getting up on time, going for meals, dealing with the social stuff and communal living) is every bit as educational, if not more so, than stuff taught in the classrooms.

[Anonymous]

I did this after I failed out of my "away" college.
I bought a used car and lived at home. I paid for everything related to my car. As long as I was going to school full time I didn't have to pay rent. At first, I went to school full time and worked part time at the college. Then I worked two part time jobs and went to school part time. Then I got a proper full time "grownup" job and went to school part time (at night). By the time I graduated and moved out I was paying my parents $800 a month, and working full time and then also a part time job at night and on the weekends.

They never had me pay for food, or utilities. I did not have a curfew, but was to let my mother know if I'd be home for dinner or not (so she knew whether to consider me when cooking), and generally what time I'd get home at night. I did all my own laundry. I helped out around the house - emptying trash and dishwasher, vacuuming, stuff like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The kids miss out on so much living at home, but it depends if you value that dorm experience.

I was a commuter student. I had plenty of the dorm experience, because my friends lived in them. I was so happy to not have to sleep in a shared cell!

Some would argue the experience of having a roommate and otherwise managing your life in a dorm (getting up on time, going for meals, dealing with the social stuff and communal living) is every bit as educational, if not more so, than stuff taught in the classrooms.

Many would disagree.

[Anonymous]

I lived near campus and didn't miss dorm life at all and was part of the college world (I didn't live home, but I didn't do the dorm thing).

My husband had a long commute each way (he lived at home) and found he was isolated and always harried.

If I lived pretty close I'd consider it, but if the commute was tough, I'd try to find the money for a dorm room.

[Anonymous]

The college I attended was 10 minute drive from home and so I commuted. It was a great decision! No communal showers, gross cafeteria food, irksome roommates, etc. I was still able to make friends and be involved in stuff and do well in my classes.

I’m now 46 and I am quite well-adjusted despite having never lived in a dorm, LOL. That’s a pretty uniquely upper-middle class American phenomenon anyway; most of world doesn’t do it. I don’t understand the obsession with the whole “dorm experience” to be honest.