Rec leagues bending rules to pick and choose players without SN

[Anonymous]

Just a vent. I feel so frustrated with rec sports leagues that are supposed to be inclusive making side deals with coaches so they discriminate against players with special needs. Can anyone else relate? Are there leagues in NW DC or Montgomery County that are really inclusive?

[Anonymous]

Is it the league or the parents.

We were in a SAM league in MoCo and a team pretended they were not a team anymore and formed a new team without the SN kid. He ended up on our team.

The week before we played their team the mom explained the situation to my H (the coach).

We put him in at striker and told every kid on the team that nobody should shoot except this kid for the 1st half. I can't remember how much we won by but it was enough and this boy scored multiple times (as he did every game). It's just this game we never took him out even though league rules say he needs to sit a quarter.

When my H went to shake the coaches hand, he held it and said, "you are an a$$hole for kicking <insert name> off your team". There were no other words and I am pretty sure the guy was not the bad guy, some mom probably was.

It is not in the spirit of any rec league that I am aware of but parents can form teams and if they have enough players they can say they don't want any kids assigned to their team.

[Anonymous]

Can you explain more how this works? What do you mean side deals? Between whom? Coach to coach? Coach/League Admin?

Are you being told there isn't room on a team when you know there is?

FWIW, rec sports leagues are covered by the ADA just like any business which is open to the public. If you are being prevented or discouraged from registering due to the disability, there may be a case under ADA. Of course, it would depend a lot on the specific facts, which you aj en't provided.

[Anonymous]

I want to meet the (good) SAM coach and give him a hug. Thank you for sharing that story. Outrageous.

It's leagues, coaches and parents. Many stories.
A coach wants to get rid of a SN player, possibly due to parents who thinks he messes up too much or doesn't add value. The SN player is not from the school because he couldn't get on the school team (that's a different story). Coach asks the league if they can call that family and "inform" them of the opportunity to move to a nearby team so they can put someone who is from the school on the team. League knows what is going on, but does it anyway. Parents comply because they don't want their child to be on a team that doesn't want him.

[Anonymous]

I know of coaches or leagues telling kids there is no room and will put a child on a wait list but then come up reasons why someone else jumped ahead on the wait list to make it on the team.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
It is not in the spirit of any rec league that I am aware of but parents can form teams and if they have enough players they can say they don't want any kids assigned to their team.

This happens a lot where we live (Potomac).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is it the league or the parents.

We were in a SAM league in MoCo and a team pretended they were not a team anymore and formed a new team without the SN kid. He ended up on our team.

The week before we played their team the mom explained the situation to my H (the coach).

We put him in at striker and told every kid on the team that nobody should shoot except this kid for the 1st half. I can't remember how much we won by but it was enough and this boy scored multiple times (as he did every game). It's just this game we never took him out even though league rules say he needs to sit a quarter.

When my H went to shake the coaches hand, he held it and said, "you are an a$$hole for kicking <insert name> off your team". There were no other words and I am pretty sure the guy was not the bad guy, some mom probably was.

It is not in the spirit of any rec league that I am aware of but parents can form teams and if they have enough players they can say they don't want any kids assigned to their team.

That is awesome. Kudos to your H. I want to see a showdown between him and the asshole coach who sometimes posts on the sports forum about how he makes sure that only his star players get play time, even on rec teams.

[Anonymous]

I can't believe someone would brag about that. I'm going to look up those threads. What a creep.

I do know a lot of rec coaches who make their weaker players sit out most of the time even though everyone is supposed to get equal playing time. But they would be mortified, as they should be, if anyone called them out on it.

[Anonymous]

The goal is to win so its not about SN, its about the stronger player. My child swims and has no issues on his team.

[Anonymous]

Montgomery Cheetahs is a hockey league just for SN kids.

http://www.montgomerycheetahs.org/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The goal is to win so its not about SN, its about the stronger player. My child swims and has no issues on his team.

The goal of what is to win? Of grade school rec league sports? No. I don't think that's the goal, not do most reasonable parents and volunteers.

[Anonymous]

My friend's dc has DS but loves soccer. There is a clique of parents in his neighborhood who put together rec teams for their area league of all kids from his neighborhood school and in many years, there has not been one free space for him on those teams with kids from his own school. Although other kids have come and gone. He always gets assigned to teams that practice in other neighborhoods with kids from other schools.

People are assholes. I don't know how some of them look themselves in the mirror in the morning.

(Oh, and the rec league rules allow an extra player on the field for his team when he plays, so its not about winning.)

[Anonymous]

I've been surprised at how often it happens that the kid with special needs can't get on the school team. I know one parent who always registers really early but each time there is a different reason why her child didn't make the cut.

[Anonymous]

Good god, I thought we were the only one this happened to. I'm sorry others experience this. One parent/coach, created a new travel team and invited nearly all the players from my DS's division. We found out after we registered for the next season and never got notified of what team my DS was assigned to. They also refused to return our calls/emails. I eventually sent an email to the Treasurer demanding a refund. DH found a league that had a spot and so DS was able to play. That was 2 years ago.

That 'travel team' (which doesn't actually travel) is now calling itself the 'feeder team' to our local high school and they've got a banner hanging on the high school fence. When I emailed the team to inquire about try outs, I was told tryouts were by invitation only. I sent an email to the high school inquiring about it. DS, understandably, feels like he's been shut out even before he had a chance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The goal is to win so its not about SN, its about the stronger player. My child swims and has no issues on his team.

The goal of Rec teams are to develop ALL the players. This isn't about travel teams.