What is #boymom?

[Anonymous]

I don't use twitter except to read what the President has said, so I have never heard of #boymom (mentioned in the weird parents thread). I have a baby boy and am wondering what things are #boymom and not #girlmom. Besides vertical pee situations, what differences in the motherhood experience are notable enough to hashtag?

[Anonymous]

I've seen friends post pictures of mud in the house or boys bringing in a lot of dirt hash tagged #boymom. As if girls don't track in dirt?

[Anonymous]

I have 2 of each gender and there is absolutely noticeable gender differences…what a strange question?

[Anonymous]

I don't think it's strange to notice differences in genders; I think it's strange to call it out on social media with hashtags.

Listen boymoms, my little girl is a mess who eats cat litter and runs away from me too.

[Anonymous]

It's dumb.

[Anonymous]

I have a boy who is older, and who plays with a lot of girls, and yes - there are (generalized) differences! Things like risk taking, style of play, physicality, noise, when certain types of maturity occur, etc... It's real. It's not all kids, but it's a generalization that bears weight in lots of cases. So I guess I am a #boymom.

Would I ever write that hashtag on Facebook or something? No way. That seems icky. Like showing a photo of my new concealer and saying #onlyforladiez - I mean sure, mostly for ladies, but that's not the entire truth!

When I've noted differences aloud to closer friends or neighbors, I usually say "I hate to generalize" or "This probably is just my experience" and 9 out of 10 times the other person say "Oh. No. I see it. It's real." They just don't hashtag it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a boy who is older, and who plays with a lot of girls, and yes - there are (generalized) differences! Things like risk taking, style of play, physicality, noise, when certain types of maturity occur, etc... It's real. It's not all kids, but it's a generalization that bears weight in lots of cases. So I guess I am a #boymom.

Would I ever write that hashtag on Facebook or something? No way. That seems icky. Like showing a photo of my new concealer and saying #onlyforladiez - I mean sure, mostly for ladies, but that's not the entire truth!

When I've noted differences aloud to closer friends or neighbors, I usually say "I hate to generalize" or "This probably is just my experience" and 9 out of 10 times the other person say "Oh. No. I see it. It's real." They just don't hashtag it!

Nope. It's socialization.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's strange to notice differences in genders; I think it's strange to call it out on social media with hashtags.

Listen boymoms, my little girl is a mess who eats cat litter and runs away from me too.

+1

The one mom I know who does this ended up with all boys and desperately wanted all girls. I think she does it to try and make herself feel better about not having a girl.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a boy who is older, and who plays with a lot of girls, and yes - there are (generalized) differences! Things like risk taking, style of play, physicality, noise, when certain types of maturity occur, etc... It's real. It's not all kids, but it's a generalization that bears weight in lots of cases. So I guess I am a #boymom.

Would I ever write that hashtag on Facebook or something? No way. That seems icky. Like showing a photo of my new concealer and saying #onlyforladiez - I mean sure, mostly for ladies, but that's not the entire truth!

When I've noted differences aloud to closer friends or neighbors, I usually say "I hate to generalize" or "This probably is just my experience" and 9 out of 10 times the other person say "Oh. No. I see it. It's real." They just don't hashtag it!

Nope. It's socialization.

Nope. It isn't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a boy who is older, and who plays with a lot of girls, and yes - there are (generalized) differences! Things like risk taking, style of play, physicality, noise, when certain types of maturity occur, etc... It's real. It's not all kids, but it's a generalization that bears weight in lots of cases. So I guess I am a #boymom.

Would I ever write that hashtag on Facebook or something? No way. That seems icky. Like showing a photo of my new concealer and saying #onlyforladiez - I mean sure, mostly for ladies, but that's not the entire truth!

When I've noted differences aloud to closer friends or neighbors, I usually say "I hate to generalize" or "This probably is just my experience" and 9 out of 10 times the other person say "Oh. No. I see it. It's real." They just don't hashtag it!

Nope. It's socialization.

Totally disagree. And I have a fairly gentle boy, and a fairly rough-and-ready girl, but there are clearly innate differences that are not socialization. DD is a little nurturer with her dolls, sushing them and putting them down to sleep, and ds just wants to build bridges all over the house. Of course each kid is individual and I support the idea that everyone should "be who they are", but I don't see how you can have any experience with children and say gender differences are strictly due to socialization.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's dumb.

They want to stand out or seem cool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a boy who is older, and who plays with a lot of girls, and yes - there are (generalized) differences! Things like risk taking, style of play, physicality, noise, when certain types of maturity occur, etc... It's real. It's not all kids, but it's a generalization that bears weight in lots of cases. So I guess I am a #boymom.

Would I ever write that hashtag on Facebook or something? No way. That seems icky. Like showing a photo of my new concealer and saying #onlyforladiez - I mean sure, mostly for ladies, but that's not the entire truth!

When I've noted differences aloud to closer friends or neighbors, I usually say "I hate to generalize" or "This probably is just my experience" and 9 out of 10 times the other person say "Oh. No. I see it. It's real." They just don't hashtag it!

Nope. It's socialization.

It's both.

Biologically, hormones and wiring contribute to us showing a spectrum of possible traits, where one side of the spectrum is this and the other is that.

Sure, society socializes our kids into performing gender roles, even if we try to combat that at home. For example, a dad on my kid's soccer team was giving a tone-deaf monologue about boys being tough and not crying and I ripped into him a few weeks ago. Loud enough that the other kids could hear someone refute the idea. But yeah, they'll hear and see this elsewhere.

Of course you could argue that my child is less likely to be socialized into performing a certain gender identity because I have tried to let him be him. Turns out "him" likes to jump up and try to touch the door frame of every single freaking doorway he walks though. Show me more than a handful of girls who do that regularly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's strange to notice differences in genders; I think it's strange to call it out on social media with hashtags.

Listen boymoms, my little girl is a mess who eats cat litter and runs away from me too.

+1

The one mom I know who does this ended up with all boys and desperately wanted all girls. I think she does it to try and make herself feel better about not having a girl.

Oh wow you are rude she sure doesn't deserve your superior girls are better attitude #boymom

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a boy who is older, and who plays with a lot of girls, and yes - there are (generalized) differences! Things like risk taking, style of play, physicality, noise, when certain types of maturity occur, etc... It's real. It's not all kids, but it's a generalization that bears weight in lots of cases. So I guess I am a #boymom.

Would I ever write that hashtag on Facebook or something? No way. That seems icky. Like showing a photo of my new concealer and saying #onlyforladiez - I mean sure, mostly for ladies, but that's not the entire truth!

When I've noted differences aloud to closer friends or neighbors, I usually say "I hate to generalize" or "This probably is just my experience" and 9 out of 10 times the other person say "Oh. No. I see it. It's real." They just don't hashtag it!

Nope. It's socialization.

You should check out the book "as nature made him".

Tldr a baby boy's entire life is horribly ruined because of the belief that gender differences are nothing more than "socialization"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a boy who is older, and who plays with a lot of girls, and yes - there are (generalized) differences! Things like risk taking, style of play, physicality, noise, when certain types of maturity occur, etc... It's real. It's not all kids, but it's a generalization that bears weight in lots of cases. So I guess I am a #boymom.

Would I ever write that hashtag on Facebook or something? No way. That seems icky. Like showing a photo of my new concealer and saying #onlyforladiez - I mean sure, mostly for ladies, but that's not the entire truth!

When I've noted differences aloud to closer friends or neighbors, I usually say "I hate to generalize" or "This probably is just my experience" and 9 out of 10 times the other person say "Oh. No. I see it. It's real." They just don't hashtag it!

Nope. It's socialization.

Totally disagree. And I have a fairly gentle boy, and a fairly rough-and-ready girl, but there are clearly innate differences that are not socialization. DD is a little nurturer with her dolls, sushing them and putting them down to sleep, and ds just wants to build bridges all over the house. Of course each kid is individual and I support the idea that everyone should "be who they are", but I don't see how you can have any experience with children and say gender differences are strictly due to socialization.

But don't you understand your girl is not representative of all girls? I have two - one sounds just like your boy and one sounds just like your girl. I don't go around saying "Oh all older girls are rough and ready and younger girls are nurturing." Also, sometimes in different scenarios they sort of swap "preferences". Which leads me to feel even more strongly that you can't lock them into specific characterizations like that.