Resign Now or Later?

Anonymous
I work at a horrible law firm with a terrible reputation. I have been there for 2 years. I am currently on maternity leave and due to return on Tuesday (as in the day after Memorial Day).

I have long been planning to leave the firm, but had hoped to stay until I could find something else, which would likely take a few months. About 3 weeks ago, I got a call from one of the meanest partners there. He has run out a lot of people and is the type to scream in your face and throw things. He told me I have been put on his case and started sending me briefs to look at before returning. I have been just traumatized ever since at the thought of returning to this guy. He is a known misogynist and voted against establishing a women's support group when my firm decided to create one. Started churning out applications immediately. I have a couple of interviews coming up.

So, here's the question: From the POV of not burning bridges, is it worse to start and then leave him in a lurch (potentially in a couple of months or sooner, if my interviews work out), or to just resign now and never return from maternity leave? Also, I am about 10 years out, went to a top school, and clerked for a federal judge. I can afford several months of being unemployed. I know it's easier to get a job while having a job, but how bad would quitting be for my job prospects? This is a question for those who have job hunted recently. I have been kicked around a lot in my career, but don't think I have it in me to duck staplers and take the kind of public humiliation this partner dishes out.
Anonymous
It's hard enough to return from maternity leave in the best of circumstances. These are more like the worst of circumstances! Preserve your sanity, and resign now.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:It's hard enough to return from maternity leave in the best of circumstances. These are more like the worst of circumstances! Preserve your sanity, and resign now.

OP here - this is what my instincts are telling me to do. As a classic overachiever turned big law punching bag, however, I have a hard time saving myself. I am also afraid quitting will make finding the next job incredibly hard. What do you think about that? I know they assigned me to this guy for abuse as a way of punishing my maternity leave.
Anonymous
In what way is he a known mysoginist?

Maybe you could use that to get assigned to a different case instead. I think you should first try to maneuver away from this and see if you can still buy some time at the firm when you can be sending out applications
Anonymous
It's not worth it- I'd resign now. Is this your first child? If so, you don't know how hard it is to return from maternity leave. It's tough enough when you have an easy job with pleasant co-workers and supervisors. If it takes you longer to find a job, just look at it as extra time spent with your baby.
Anonymous
Agree - your instinct that it will be harder to find a job if you quit is correct IMO, and it could seem like you played games by waiting to quit T the end of your maternity leave, but maybe that's just the way it has to be. Is this in DC? Can you find out if you are entitled to some unpaid family leave - I thought DC law was pretty generous on this. I'm amazed this firm manages to exist with those conditions ... there are plenty of ways to complain and some of what this partner does -- like throwing things at people -- is crazy.
Anonymous
My view - quit now. Don't come back and then quit. Especially if you are leaving for another job.
Anonymous
I almost always oppose women quitting a job at the end of maternity leave...but not in your case, OP. Don't put yourself in an abusive situation.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I almost always oppose women quitting a job at the end of maternity leave...but not in your case, OP. Don't put yourself in an abusive situation.


+1000

I dislike saying this, but you have the perfect situation, OP, to exit at the end of your maternity leave. Take the exit path and avoid the abuse.
Anonymous
Will you have to pay back your benefits if you leave now?
Anonymous
A horrible law firm with a terrible reputation? Sounds like any number of firms, particularly the branch offices of NYC firms.

Anyway, I'd quit now. You know he's going to make your life hell for the sport of it if you return. Keeping some fat pig with a bad temper and giant ego happy is so not worth it.
Anonymous
Just to sort of play devil's advocate, the first year is rough, and I would hate to have to build my credibility at a new firm during that time.

I think my preferences would be:

1) Try to get re-assigned to a different partner. Is there another partner you are close to that you can ask to request you?

2) Resign, take a longer maternity leave, and start looking for a new job around 9 months.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I almost always oppose women quitting a job at the end of maternity leave...but not in your case, OP. Don't put yourself in an abusive situation.


+1000

I dislike saying this, but you have the perfect situation, OP, to exit at the end of your maternity leave. Take the exit path and avoid the abuse.
+1. I rarely advise women to quit right after maternity leave, but in your case I would do it without hesitation. Alternatively, if you think you can maneuver away from that case while sending out applications elsewhere I would try that, but only if you can be put on another case. I can't believe that ahole was sending you briefs to read while on maternity leave- I hope you didn't reply to his emails or sent a message saying you'll review them when you return. It makes me so angry for you!!
Anonymous
Am I the only one who thinks OP should put on some big girl panties? Just about lawyer I know ends of up doing some amount of work during maternity or other leave. It's called being a professional. So Mr. Litigator is stressed and wants to make sure the associate assigned to his case is going to be ready to help him out when she gets back to the office? Again, its called being a professional.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Am I the only one who thinks OP should put on some big girl panties? Just about lawyer I know ends of up doing some amount of work during maternity or other leave. It's called being a professional. So Mr. Litigator is stressed and wants to make sure the associate assigned to his case is going to be ready to help him out when she gets back to the office? Again, its called being a professional.

How are you so lacking in reading comprehension as a lawyer? Having to read briefs on maternity leave is not the point of the OP.
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