Bat mitzvah dress
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
| DD found a dress - is unique, will probably look good on her. But $150+ than I had anticipated, though cheaper than her previous first choice. many of the ones we both like have already been worn by friends. my gut says no, but i always follow my gut... |
Anonymous
| Why would you say no based on your gut and not your wallet? Do your finances allow for the dress that is $150+ more than what you anticipated? If so, buy the dress. If not, tell your DD your EXACT budget and let her know she has to work within those parameters. Simple. |
Anonymous
|
Is there any other occasion where she could wear this dress that you would otherwise buy her a new one? Where do you think she is in her growth?
Could you sell it after? |
Anonymous
|
What about renting a dress? I don't recall ever re-wearing my Bat Mitzvah dress...
http://charlottes-closet.com/ |
Anonymous
|
We can afford. I had not specified budget as assumed she would find something that was in range of what I was thinking.
Expect she will grow another few inches, but not much more. Worried that renting could lead to a disaster. |
Anonymous
| I'm fairly cheap, admittedly, and the enormous blow out bat mitzvahs seem crazy sometimes. But for the dress...I don't know, I think she should love it. I would skimp on centerpieces and things like that, but I would likely splurge on the dress. Assuming she won't have a big sweet 16, there won't be many opportunities to splurge on a dress, prom maybe, wedding. IF you can easily afford it, I would go for it. |
Anonymous
| I only wore my bat mitzvah dress twice - for that day and then to a boy's bar mitzvah I got invited to that was two months later. |
Anonymous
| Buy it! My mom bought me a really special dress for my friend's bar mitvah, it made me feel great and I still treasure that memory today. |
Anonymous
| Sell it after. https://www.facebook.com/ITSMYPARTYCONSIGNMENT/ They have a ton of Bat Mitzvah dresses and I'm sure would take your dress. |
Anonymous
| Why is your gut saying no, if the dress is appropriate, you can afford it, and she loves it? |
Anonymous
If she gets a $350-400 dress for her bat mitzvah, what will she expect for prom, etc? I try to think about the future, not just the moment, in these kinds of decisions. |
Anonymous
You're going to be paying that much for a prom dress too, if you can afford it. That's reality. And then there's shoes, hair, etc. So if money is an issue don't spend a cent more than you can afford, but if you can afford it, buy the dress. Maybe shop around a bit more to see if there's something else out there that also fits the bill. |
Anonymous
You're making this way too complicated. I went to a lot of school dances. The costs of the dresses didn't escalate each time. My mom and I had fun shopping together. Sometimes we found a steal, sometimes we found something too fantastic to pass up despite the cost, sometimes the event itself mattered "less" and my girlfriends and I swapped. I'm not Jewish but I went to school with a lot of kids who were. One of my bar mitzvah dresses was $150, which was a lot to our family at the time. It didn't set me up to feel entitled or want to shop at that store or spend that much the next time. |
Anonymous
I DK why you think I am making this more complicated. Feel like I know a lot of adults who got it all as kids, especially as tweens and teens, and had a hard time negotiating the transition to adulthood. trying to be mindful that we are helping her grow roots and wings here.... |
Anonymous
| OP: is this for her bat mitzvah? if yes, then get her what she wants withing reason---a lot of pressure on her that day. If it is for a friend's bat mitzvah, then don't bother. |