Teen overreaction to punishment
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Anonymous
| 13 yr old DD was on her phone the entire time we were at my sisters for dinner this evening. She basically ignored anyone who tried to talk to her. It came across as incredibly rude. After the dinner and her little sister was in bed we asked her to please sit her phone on the table so we could talk. She became extremely upset and started yelling how annoying we are and refused to sit her phone on the table. I told her I just wanted to talk to her without distractions about her behavior at dinner. She told I was over reacting and still refused to simply lay the phone down. I told her I was no longer asking and to sit the phone down now! She stood there and did not put I down. I told her fine since she can't communicate without a phone in her hand she would not have a phone over break. She flipped out and started crying hysterically and I had to physically take the phone from her. This happened at 10pm and she still in bed room crying saying how horrible we are for ruining her holiday. |
Anonymous
| You were right, but were there rules put in place before the T holiday about phones? Did you say something during the dinner? I would have no problems saying out loud in front of everyone: "put your phone down or else". |
Anonymous
| I'm shocked she was allowed to have her phone out when she was a guest at someone's house. My 13 yr old had to leave hers in her jacket. |
Anonymous
|
1. You should have discussed phone behavior before hand.
2. You should have had her put her phone away at dinner. 3. You shouldn't have tried to have a rational conversation with a 13 year old at 10 pm. The way you approached her was very confrontational and asking to get the outcome you got. Basically you were embarrassed by her behavior at dinner and because you didn't deal with it appropriately at the time you went into over drive and wanted to show her who was boss. 4. I think you've overreacted with the punishment that's going to get you nowhere fast. 5. It's pretty clear something is going on with her. Good luck figuring it out now that you've created a power struggle. |
Anonymous
| What do you mean "I had to physically take the phone from her"? |
Anonymous
| Cancel the phone plan, really she is 13 and is a monster. Phones are not some right as a young teen. |
Anonymous
|
To be fair to her, sounds like you were pretty aggressive about it and the "I had to physically take it from her" sounds vaguely threatening and like it might have gotten violent.
If she is hysterically crying that is a major clue that you did something seriously wrong. |
Anonymous
What???? She hates having her phone taken away means Mom is wrong???????? |
Anonymous
| She was talking to her boyfriend and you are annoying her. She does not want you going through her text messages. |
Anonymous
Because she's hysterically upset, duh? |
Anonymous
Really, this is so confusing to me. Teen has hissy fit over losing phone that MOM PAYS FOR and somehow Mom needs to coddle teen??? No Teen that is not driving needs a phone. |
Anonymous
Some teens get hysterical as a matter of course, others only when there's something serious going on. Only OP knows which one she has, and make decisions accordingly. I agree with the others that the teen should have known not to use the phone like this, and this is a parenting fail from the beginning. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
Says the mom of a sweet toddler. If she is crying hysterically over being told to.put down her phone it means she is a 13 year old used to getting her own way who got called out for being a brat. |
Anonymous
| I would have told her BEFORE WE SAT AT THE TABLE to put it down. |