Dear brides and grooms pressuring people to attend

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Ugh. Literally no sympathy for 2021 brides and grooms.

I've been married for 32 years, and I feel very sorry for people getting married right now. The whole situation is such a shame for young couples. However, I think if I were in this situation, I would elope and have a big party in a year, when everyone could attend. I would not put my loved ones in a situation where they had to say no to me.

It's so nice to hear from a caring adult. I wish you were my mother in law.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the MOH for a wedding shortly after New Year. The rest of the bridal party dropped out. I'm the last one standing. The bride is my sister. I really REALLY do not want to do this. It involves travel and lots of indoor socializing with lots of people in a state that's in COVID denial and hasn't limited gatherings or encouraged masks. But she's made it clear that she's getting married in a specific time and place, and if people don't show up, well she'll learn to accept the fact that her closest family and friends don't truly love her.
It is beyond selfish, and I don't know how to back out without ruining our relationship for life.

The possibility of people dying because of this doesn't trump her immaturity and selfishness? Have you spoken honestly to her and told her this makes you angry? Are you generally whimpy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're worried, don't go. Op's complaint is completely legit. Op, is ridiculous that you had to put up with pressure. Everyone else piling-on against a small group of people standing in a field, and a couple saying, "I Do" --- chill. Not every thing is dangerous.

I spoke yesterday with a friend whose cousin had a "small, outdoor" wedding in upstate New York the Saturday after Thanksgiving. Eighteen out of 30 now have COVID. The hardest hit was a 22-year-old with no health problems who is now in ICU. They wore masks, it was outside...

I have a hard time believing people are getting covid when outside and wearing masks. Did the folks at the wedding ride in cars together or gather at a hotel indoors or go bowling or spend time at a bar together? It always turns out that they spent time indoors together and that’s how they got covid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're worried, don't go. Op's complaint is completely legit. Op, is ridiculous that you had to put up with pressure. Everyone else piling-on against a small group of people standing in a field, and a couple saying, "I Do" --- chill. Not every thing is dangerous.

I spoke yesterday with a friend whose cousin had a "small, outdoor" wedding in upstate New York the Saturday after Thanksgiving. Eighteen out of 30 now have COVID. The hardest hit was a 22-year-old with no health problems who is now in ICU. They wore masks, it was outside...

I have a hard time believing people are getting covid when outside and wearing masks. Did the folks at the wedding ride in cars together or gather at a hotel indoors or go bowling or spend time at a bar together? It always turns out that they spent time indoors together and that’s how they got covid.

I can tell you how. I belong to a group with a specific outdoor interest. I signed up for an outdoor event where the group running it made us all sign a document saying we'd be masked and stay 6 ft apart. It was 2 minutes into the event that we had a person with no mask participating and the leaders wouldn't say anything because it was a guy and he is an expert at what we were doing. He planned to keep a greater distance from the rest of us but within 5 minutes was on top of me multiple times. I got angry and told him to stay the f away from me. It did nothing as he was a friend of the leader. As we continued on the leaders dropped their masks more often to speak It was clear my spouse and I and a few others were not comfortable but the leaders ignored it and did whatever they felt comfortable with which was coming up to us very close multiple times to talk with guide books while their masks were dropped. These are all liberal, environmental types. It was asinine and disgusting. I'll never donate another penny now that I know what selfish asshats these people are. There was no breeze and I have no doubt if anyone there was positive, the virus found new hosts that day.

Seemingly sane people often have such a strong desire for social interaction that they will make crazy decisions that are not based on logic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're worried, don't go. Op's complaint is completely legit. Op, is ridiculous that you had to put up with pressure. Everyone else piling-on against a small group of people standing in a field, and a couple saying, "I Do" --- chill. Not every thing is dangerous.

I spoke yesterday with a friend whose cousin had a "small, outdoor" wedding in upstate New York the Saturday after Thanksgiving. Eighteen out of 30 now have COVID. The hardest hit was a 22-year-old with no health problems who is now in ICU. They wore masks, it was outside...

I have a hard time believing people are getting covid when outside and wearing masks. Did the folks at the wedding ride in cars together or gather at a hotel indoors or go bowling or spend time at a bar together? It always turns out that they spent time indoors together and that’s how they got covid.

What you believe or feel you deserve to know doesn't actually matter that much. It doesn't really take you believing something for it to occur. Funny, that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're worried, don't go. Op's complaint is completely legit. Op, is ridiculous that you had to put up with pressure. Everyone else piling-on against a small group of people standing in a field, and a couple saying, "I Do" --- chill. Not every thing is dangerous.

I spoke yesterday with a friend whose cousin had a "small, outdoor" wedding in upstate New York the Saturday after Thanksgiving. Eighteen out of 30 now have COVID. The hardest hit was a 22-year-old with no health problems who is now in ICU. They wore masks, it was outside...

I have a hard time believing people are getting covid when outside and wearing masks. Did the folks at the wedding ride in cars together or gather at a hotel indoors or go bowling or spend time at a bar together? It always turns out that they spent time indoors together and that’s how they got covid.

unless they drank and ate through their ears, it is not really hard to understand how something like that can happen

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dear guests who don't want to attend:

Thank you for your honesty. I understand we are making different choices and that you don't like mine. Please don't make me feel guilty that I still need to move on with my life and don't ask me to reschedule or make me feel guilty for "not including" you

BZZT! Wrong answer. You don't "need" to hold a wedding with guests in a pandemic. You WANT to hold a wedding with guests during a pandemic.

You can either A. delay your wedding until we are not in the throes of a pandemic or B. get JUST as married with you, and officiant and witnesses and throw a celebration later.

The line between "need" and "want" has become *shockingly* blurred in the ME-ME-ME selfish set.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the MOH for a wedding shortly after New Year. The rest of the bridal party dropped out. I'm the last one standing. The bride is my sister. I really REALLY do not want to do this. It involves travel and lots of indoor socializing with lots of people in a state that's in COVID denial and hasn't limited gatherings or encouraged masks. But she's made it clear that she's getting married in a specific time and place, and if people don't show up, well she'll learn to accept the fact that her closest family and friends don't truly love her.
It is beyond selfish, and I don't know how to back out without ruining our relationship for life.

I'll be honest --- if it were me, I'd think that the relationship was already ruined. She is using emotional manipulation to try to get people to risk their health, and the health of others, for a party (NOT a wedding, since she can get married). She is incredibly selfish. Even if you go along, you'll always know that your sister was okay with you getting sick, maybe very sick, and maybe dying, for a non-essential, non-emergency event. It would be one thing if she really wanted you to come and be one of two witnesses or something, but she's having a big wedding and reception, which is not remotely necessary or advisable.

+1. She's already ruined the relationship. There's no need to maintain a relationship with someone who is willing to put your life at risk for a party. Just cut her out and don't think twice. Life is too short to waste time on toxic people.

This. The sister sounds very irresponsible and immature. The whole Bridezilla culture is ridiculous enough in normal times, but during a pandemic? Nah. Not a good look.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're worried, don't go. Op's complaint is completely legit. Op, is ridiculous that you had to put up with pressure. Everyone else piling-on against a small group of people standing in a field, and a couple saying, "I Do" --- chill. Not every thing is dangerous.

I spoke yesterday with a friend whose cousin had a "small, outdoor" wedding in upstate New York the Saturday after Thanksgiving. Eighteen out of 30 now have COVID. The hardest hit was a 22-year-old with no health problems who is now in ICU. They wore masks, it was outside...

Obviously, the healthy 22-year-old is actually elderly or obese, and you just did not notice. [/s]

Or was stupid enough to CHOOSE to be born with a prevoiusly undiagnosed preexisting condition, which therefore makes their life disposable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're worried, don't go. Op's complaint is completely legit. Op, is ridiculous that you had to put up with pressure. Everyone else piling-on against a small group of people standing in a field, and a couple saying, "I Do" --- chill. Not every thing is dangerous.

I spoke yesterday with a friend whose cousin had a "small, outdoor" wedding in upstate New York the Saturday after Thanksgiving. Eighteen out of 30 now have COVID. The hardest hit was a 22-year-old with no health problems who is now in ICU. They wore masks, it was outside...

Obviously, the healthy 22-year-old is actually elderly or obese, and you just did not notice. [/s]

Shut the fuk up. You are wrong, and you are stupid.

Hey, Meemaw. /s means sarcasm. The poster is mocking the idiots who dismiss COVID cases and make excuses about why anyone who gets it was obviously vulnerable, so it won't happen to THEM.

Go take your pill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're worried, don't go. Op's complaint is completely legit. Op, is ridiculous that you had to put up with pressure. Everyone else piling-on against a small group of people standing in a field, and a couple saying, "I Do" --- chill. Not every thing is dangerous.

I spoke yesterday with a friend whose cousin had a "small, outdoor" wedding in upstate New York the Saturday after Thanksgiving. Eighteen out of 30 now have COVID. The hardest hit was a 22-year-old with no health problems who is now in ICU. They wore masks, it was outside...

I have a hard time believing people are getting covid when outside and wearing masks. Did the folks at the wedding ride in cars together or gather at a hotel indoors or go bowling or spend time at a bar together? It always turns out that they spent time indoors together and that’s how they got covid.

I have a middle-aged friend who's fighting COVID right now. They are insanely careful and she knows for certain the only exposure she's had in the past 3+ weeks was at an outdoor church drive where they were packing boxes for charity for Christmas, distanced and masked. No, they did not eat in restaurants or shop in stores or do any of those things.

These "masked, distanced" events are not distanced every minute. People are people. Is it safer than eating in a restaurant? Sure. But does it mean you can't get COVID? No, it doesn't.

Oh, and did nobody eat or drink during these weddings? If so, how did they so do continually masked? Yeah, I thought not.

[Anonymous]

I feel sorry for people dealing with relatives and friends who are in COVID-denial areas. It's easy to write them off as selfish or stupid, but if everyone around them is ignoring the pandemic, it's hard to be the odd one out. December is a big wedding month in my hometown (in Mississippi), and my social media is full of people having big, formal weddings, seated receptions, dancing, and not a mask in sight. Makes it hard to feel ill will toward my sister who wants just a pared down version of the same. Why should she be told to postpone or go to the courthouse with two witnesses when everyone else is continuing on with their dream big day?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're worried, don't go. Op's complaint is completely legit. Op, is ridiculous that you had to put up with pressure. Everyone else piling-on against a small group of people standing in a field, and a couple saying, "I Do" --- chill. Not every thing is dangerous.

I spoke yesterday with a friend whose cousin had a "small, outdoor" wedding in upstate New York the Saturday after Thanksgiving. Eighteen out of 30 now have COVID. The hardest hit was a 22-year-old with no health problems who is now in ICU. They wore masks, it was outside...

I have a hard time believing people are getting covid when outside and wearing masks. Did the folks at the wedding ride in cars together or gather at a hotel indoors or go bowling or spend time at a bar together? It always turns out that they spent time indoors together and that’s how they got covid.

What you believe or feel you deserve to know doesn't actually matter that much. It doesn't really take you believing something for it to occur. Funny, that.

While correct, I also trust nothing on an anonymous internet site . Come on, DCUM is no different than. Reddit etc in this respect

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're worried, don't go. Op's complaint is completely legit. Op, is ridiculous that you had to put up with pressure. Everyone else piling-on against a small group of people standing in a field, and a couple saying, "I Do" --- chill. Not every thing is dangerous.

I spoke yesterday with a friend whose cousin had a "small, outdoor" wedding in upstate New York the Saturday after Thanksgiving. Eighteen out of 30 now have COVID. The hardest hit was a 22-year-old with no health problems who is now in ICU. They wore masks, it was outside...

I have a hard time believing people are getting covid when outside and wearing masks. Did the folks at the wedding ride in cars together or gather at a hotel indoors or go bowling or spend time at a bar together? It always turns out that they spent time indoors together and that’s how they got covid.

What you believe or feel you deserve to know doesn't actually matter that much. It doesn't really take you believing something for it to occur. Funny, that.

While correct, I also trust nothing on an anonymous internet site . Come on, DCUM is no different than. Reddit etc in this respect

Good for you! You may as well scurry along, because I will continue to post my real-life experiences and those of my friends right here on DCUM, when relevant to a topic at hand. If you don't like that, you can see yourself out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel sorry for people dealing with relatives and friends who are in COVID-denial areas. It's easy to write them off as selfish or stupid, but if everyone around them is ignoring the pandemic, it's hard to be the odd one out. December is a big wedding month in my hometown (in Mississippi), and my social media is full of people having big, formal weddings, seated receptions, dancing, and not a mask in sight. Makes it hard to feel ill will toward my sister who wants just a pared down version of the same. Why should she be told to postpone or go to the courthouse with two witnesses when everyone else is continuing on with their dream big day?

Why? Because people's lives are on the line, moron. Right is right and wrong is wrong. No matter who else is doing what. Like, what, your parents didn't teach you that? You don't teach your kids that? You missed Dumbledore's speeches in "Harry Potter"?