The End of Sex

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In light of the "Me too" movement and "enthusiastic consent" I do think men get mixed messages. On the one hand men are told to be respectful, ask for consent every step of the way.

But at least some women think that's boring and a sure way to keep their panties on. They want the man to be assertive and dominant in the bedroom.

Certainly some men can navigate the fine line between dominance and coercion and manage to insure enthusiastic consent while being aggressive and dominant. But we're fooling ourselves if we think everyone can.

Some people can dunk a basketball or hit a homerun. Doesn't men every joe off the street can.

No. Any men who are aggressive and dominate sexually runs the risk of it going south. It might be fine for the 10% women who are in to that but for others it will be seen as rapey or just rape. Alpha males are the ones who end up on the wrong end of the #metoo news.

Causation correlation. Alpha males tend to dominate in their chosen professions, thus making women gravitate toward them. Whether that carries over into these weird, creepy me too moments is unclear.

Why do you people get so tied up in mental masturbation? Simply show respect or consideration each step of the way and let it fly as it happens.

Please go back and reread the article. What you just said equals The End of Sex. That's the whole point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The title (End of Sex) is dramatically misleading. They really just mean "The End of Monogamous Married Sex" as men finally awake the fact married women are bored and have lost interest (in husband). Society is already adapting as expected: fewer men getting married, divorce law reform, and mainstream acceptance of open marriages.

You are being dramatic. People still get married and women still lose interest and men still have affairs. Tale as old as time

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The title (End of Sex) is dramatically misleading. They really just mean "The End of Monogamous Married Sex" as men finally awake the fact married women are bored and have lost interest (in husband). Society is already adapting as expected: fewer men getting married, divorce law reform, and mainstream acceptance of open marriages.

You are being dramatic. People still get married and women still lose interest and men still have affairs. Tale as old as time

I, for one, have definitely not lost interest in my husband of 34 years. He will arrive home Sunday after an eight day trip and we are both looking forward to our “reunion”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The title (End of Sex) is dramatically misleading. They really just mean "The End of Monogamous Married Sex" as men finally awake the fact married women are bored and have lost interest (in husband). Society is already adapting as expected: fewer men getting married, divorce law reform, and mainstream acceptance of open marriages.

You are being dramatic. People still get married and women still lose interest and men still have affairs. Tale as old as time

I, for one, have definitely not lost interest in my husband of 34 years. He will arrive home Sunday after an eight day trip and we are both looking forward to our “reunion”.

...and?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The title (End of Sex) is dramatically misleading. They really just mean "The End of Monogamous Married Sex" as men finally awake the fact married women are bored and have lost interest (in husband). Society is already adapting as expected: fewer men getting married, divorce law reform, and mainstream acceptance of open marriages.

You are being dramatic. People still get married and women still lose interest and men still have affairs. Tale as old as time

I, for one, have definitely not lost interest in my husband of 34 years. He will arrive home Sunday after an eight day trip and we are both looking forward to our “reunion”.

...and?

You will have to wait until Monday

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In light of the "Me too" movement and "enthusiastic consent" I do think men get mixed messages. On the one hand men are told to be respectful, ask for consent every step of the way.

But at least some women think that's boring and a sure way to keep their panties on. They want the man to be assertive and dominant in the bedroom.

Certainly some men can navigate the fine line between dominance and coercion and manage to insure enthusiastic consent while being aggressive and dominant. But we're fooling ourselves if we think everyone can.

Some people can dunk a basketball or hit a homerun. Doesn't men every joe off the street can.

No. Any men who are aggressive and dominate sexually runs the risk of it going south. It might be fine for the 10% women who are in to that but for others it will be seen as rapey or just rape. Alpha males are the ones who end up on the wrong end of the #metoo news.

Trust me on this, it's a LOT higher than 10% of women who are into a man being dominant and aggressive in the bedroom.

[Anonymous]

Trust me on this, it’s a LOT higher than 10% of men who enjoy a woman dominant in the bedroom. Usually men who need to control everything. They crave this release.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I like a man in the bedroom. Always! I want to lose control of reality when I have sex. Not in a dom/sub way at all. And I don't mean vanilla/starfish sex either. Make it hot and I'm all over you! BJs are forthcoming regardless, but please make me want to be starved for you. I don't need emotional intensity, I need physical intensity with subtle gentle touches to fill in for the emotional part.

Wow, now I want to have that kind of sex. DH treats me like a porcelain doll in the bedroom. I do love him for this but c'mon man!

+1000, this is exactly how I like my sex and it is exactly what I get. I always leave wanting more. It keeps our relationship going strong. We have been together 7 years now and the sex is still hot.

I personally feel this sexual dynamic makes me overlook a lot of other things, that might otherwise annoy me. I am also much less of a nag. Lol. The point being, when I am getting this kind of sex, I am a lot less stressed out, feel more connected to him, and we both smile and laugh a lot more together. My partner jokes with me that whenever I am starting to get cranky or bitchy, he knows it's his job to take me to the bedroom and spend an hour or two having the opposite of "boring" "meek" sex! Instant mood changer.

I have no interest in polite sex. Now outside of the bedroom, yes, I am a lady. There is also something my mother once told me before I got married, and she has been married for 42 years, "Always make your husband feel like a true man in the bedroom, and allow him to make you feel like the sexiest women alive." Now you can take that anyway you would like, but any man worth his salt knows what I mean! I have taken this advice and it has served me very well!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Trust me on this, it’s a LOT higher than 10% of men who enjoy a woman dominant in the bedroom. Usually men who need to control everything. They crave this release.

I think my husband would agree with the above. We go back and forth on who’s the dominant one but I’d guess that 50% of the time no one really plays that role and we just make it happen. But I know that when I’m dominant my husband really enjoys it because I get really active. When he’s dominant I feel like a character in a cheap romance novel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Haven't read the article yet, but I've always thought it well known that most women get turned on by being the object of desire and having an assertive, more dominant lover. I've never had trouble finding this in men. And I'm not talking about jerks or a-holes. I've met plenty of men who are perfectly nice, considerate gentlemen, not sexists, can treat women as equals but know how to take charge in bed. Maybe it's because I'm older and my partners have been around my same age. Is there really a dearth of sexually confident, assertive men in younger generations that know how to navigate this duality? Women used to be told all the time that we needed to be a whore in the bedroom and a lady outside of it. Are younger men unable to pull the equivalent off?

This made me laugh!! The word on the street is that yes, the younger generation of men, if we are calling them that, have zero idea how to pull this off. There are going to be a lot of cranky women on the streets. I am convinced we would all be happier if everyone got their roles down! Lol

[Anonymous]

I can't relate to any of you married people not having sex and enjoying it with your spouse.

However, my DH is a provider. A mand man, masculine and that's a turn on in and outside of the bedroom. I don't chore play to have sex. That's actually pretty weak. If I had wanted to marry a woman, I would have done that in the first place.

[Anonymous]

The End of Sex - really? My husband of 31 years is arriving home late tonight after a 9 day trip and before that I had a terrible cold so we have had no connection for a good two weeks or more. I'm not a high libido person but after two weeks I just want the connection that we only get through sex. If he's tired I will take charge.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It seems to me that the only useful purpose of marriage is to have children in a socially acceptable manner. If men and women are biologically programmed to be bored by long monogamy, make each marriage certificate valid for only 10 years, subject to renewal only if both parties agree. This will prevent either spouse from taking the other one for granted. This will reduce the need for divorce as well, as unhappy marriages will simply run their course and result in a no-fault ending.

Marriage has always been primarily an institution for the stability of raising kids and accumulating and transferring wealth and is still excellent at that. Monogamy has always been a charade, and between divorce and cheating, only about 10-20% of couples who get married in their 20% actually make it to the end faithfully. It's not that marriage needs to be thrown out so much as attitudes towards monogamy will become relaxed and already are. Case in point the current president whom even the evangelicals don't care about him sleeping with a porn star while his wife was pregnant.