Why are parents so invested

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Wow. Just wow. I believe you can be passionate and caring without being an asshole. You can cheer on your kid, other kids on the team, without screaming at the ref, telling the players what to do (shoot, shoot, SHOOT damn it) or say "nice save" to either keeper that makes a nice save, and not put down, mock or taunt the players or the parents on the other side. It's called sportsmanship. Or civility. And it IS lacking in youth soccer.

No it is not lacking. The straw man the OP puts out here is just that, a straw man. I have never seen any parent mock or put down a player. It does not happen.

+1000

This whole thread is hyperbole in the extreme.

You mean like saying “this whole thread is hyperbole in the extreme?”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Wow. Just wow. I believe you can be passionate and caring without being an asshole. You can cheer on your kid, other kids on the team, without screaming at the ref, telling the players what to do (shoot, shoot, SHOOT damn it) or say "nice save" to either keeper that makes a nice save, and not put down, mock or taunt the players or the parents on the other side. It's called sportsmanship. Or civility. And it IS lacking in youth soccer.

No it is not lacking. The straw man the OP puts out here is just that, a straw man. I have never seen any parent mock or put down a player. It does not happen.

+1000

This whole thread is hyperbole in the extreme.

You mean like saying “this whole thread is hyperbole in the extreme?”

When a poster claims that kids are "terrorized" that is hyperbole.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have never seen this but I assume it’s b/c they are counting on soccer paying for college — that’s high stakes.

And idiotic.

They’d be better off and have more chances with an academic scholarship.

Exactly! They should make their kids crack a book open instead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Wow. Just wow. I believe you can be passionate and caring without being an asshole. You can cheer on your kid, other kids on the team, without screaming at the ref, telling the players what to do (shoot, shoot, SHOOT damn it) or say "nice save" to either keeper that makes a nice save, and not put down, mock or taunt the players or the parents on the other side. It's called sportsmanship. Or civility. And it IS lacking in youth soccer.

No it is not lacking. The straw man the OP puts out here is just that, a straw man. I have never seen any parent mock or put down a player. It does not happen.

+1000

This whole thread is hyperbole in the extreme.

You mean like saying “this whole thread is hyperbole in the extreme?”

When a poster claims that kids are "terrorized" that is hyperbole.

Yes. But that is not the whole thread. And I think hyperbole already means extreme.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Wow. Just wow. I believe you can be passionate and caring without being an asshole. You can cheer on your kid, other kids on the team, without screaming at the ref, telling the players what to do (shoot, shoot, SHOOT damn it) or say "nice save" to either keeper that makes a nice save, and not put down, mock or taunt the players or the parents on the other side. It's called sportsmanship. Or civility. And it IS lacking in youth soccer.

No it is not lacking. The straw man the OP puts out here is just that, a straw man. I have never seen any parent mock or put down a player. It does not happen.

+1000

This whole thread is hyperbole in the extreme.

You mean like saying “this whole thread is hyperbole in the extreme?”

When a poster claims that kids are "terrorized" that is hyperbole.

Yes. But that is not the whole thread. And I think hyperbole already means extreme.

That was the first post and the premise of the thread. Yes, the entire premise of this thread is based on hyperbole.

[Anonymous]

DP and a parent new to soccer. My DD, 4th grader, is pretty athletic and we've let her try different sports over the years. She's done figure skating, swimming, baseball, basketball, running (ended up sticking with basketball and track over the years), and this is the first year she asked to sign up her for a rec soccer league.

My sampling size is ridiculously small, so I'm not extrapolating what I've seen on soccer fields so far to youth soccer in general, but, man, those parents ARE insane. So much pointless screaming! We've never experienced anything like that sitting through multiple basketball games (not to mention track-and-field competition, for whatever reason, track parents are great, and there's a real camaraderie on the team, despite track being an individual sport).

I'm so looking forward to the end of this soccer season! Just my 2 cents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DP and a parent new to soccer. My DD, 4th grader, is pretty athletic and we've let her try different sports over the years. She's done figure skating, swimming, baseball, basketball, running (ended up sticking with basketball and track over the years), and this is the first year she asked to sign up her for a rec soccer league.

My sampling size is ridiculously small, so I'm not extrapolating what I've seen on soccer fields so far to youth soccer in general, but, man, those parents ARE insane. So much pointless screaming! We've never experienced anything like that sitting through multiple basketball games (not to mention track-and-field competition, for whatever reason, track parents are great, and there's a real camaraderie on the team, despite track being an individual sport).

I'm so looking forward to the end of this soccer season! Just my 2 cents.

Sounds like rec soccer to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DP and a parent new to soccer. My DD, 4th grader, is pretty athletic and we've let her try different sports over the years. She's done figure skating, swimming, baseball, basketball, running (ended up sticking with basketball and track over the years), and this is the first year she asked to sign up her for a rec soccer league.

My sampling size is ridiculously small, so I'm not extrapolating what I've seen on soccer fields so far to youth soccer in general, but, man, those parents ARE insane. So much pointless screaming! We've never experienced anything like that sitting through multiple basketball games (not to mention track-and-field competition, for whatever reason, track parents are great, and there's a real camaraderie on the team, despite track being an individual sport).

I'm so looking forward to the end of this soccer season! Just my 2 cents.

Sounds like rec soccer to me.

I agree there is not a lot of parent screaming in 4th grade track

[Anonymous]

Stress?

[Anonymous]

You folks need to try football games. Doesn't matter what age....they are full on battle mode.

[Anonymous]

I have had kids play softball, basketball, and soccer (travel and rec). I've also coached all three. I've also watched friend's kids play football and baseball games.

There is little to no difference between these sports and the parents in fact I notice that soccer parents are generally more well-behaved (unless they are from Jersey ). There are a lot of great parents and some crazy parents (and coaches). Regardless of the sport the parents want their child to do well at their sport. Some are uber competitive but take it to the next level with grace, some not so much. Parents are invested for the same reason they want a bigger house, better car, better job, nicer clothes, better education, etc. It is our competitive nature as humans. Add love for your child into the mix and you get some crazy behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DP and a parent new to soccer. My DD, 4th grader, is pretty athletic and we've let her try different sports over the years. She's done figure skating, swimming, baseball, basketball, running (ended up sticking with basketball and track over the years), and this is the first year she asked to sign up her for a rec soccer league.

My sampling size is ridiculously small, so I'm not extrapolating what I've seen on soccer fields so far to youth soccer in general, but, man, those parents ARE insane. So much pointless screaming! We've never experienced anything like that sitting through multiple basketball games (not to mention track-and-field competition, for whatever reason, track parents are great, and there's a real camaraderie on the team, despite track being an individual sport).

I'm so looking forward to the end of this soccer season! Just my 2 cents.

With soccer, the higher the level and older the kids are, the quieter the sideline. My daughter plays ECNL (not in the DMV area) and it's rare that you come across a parent ranting on the sidelines. Some of her friends play town (rec) soccer and when I occasionally bring her to watch a game, everyone is yelling and screaming (and coaching) from the sidelines... If a parent from my daughter's team coached their kid from the sideline, they would be told to leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Wow. Just wow. I believe you can be passionate and caring without being an asshole. You can cheer on your kid, other kids on the team, without screaming at the ref, telling the players what to do (shoot, shoot, SHOOT damn it) or say "nice save" to either keeper that makes a nice save, and not put down, mock or taunt the players or the parents on the other side. It's called sportsmanship. Or civility. And it IS lacking in youth soccer.

OP, you’re right. And I agree with a PP who said it’s mostly about parents who want their kids to WIN! MUST WIN! Their kid must be on the best team, and must be the best in that team. Anything getting in the way of that (and it’s a lot) is a trigger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Wow. Just wow. I believe you can be passionate and caring without being an asshole. You can cheer on your kid, other kids on the team, without screaming at the ref, telling the players what to do (shoot, shoot, SHOOT damn it) or say "nice save" to either keeper that makes a nice save, and not put down, mock or taunt the players or the parents on the other side. It's called sportsmanship. Or civility. And it IS lacking in youth soccer.

OP, you’re right. And I agree with a PP who said it’s mostly about parents who want their kids to WIN! MUST WIN! Their kid must be on the best team, and must be the best in that team. Anything getting in the way of that (and it’s a lot) is a trigger.

+1