Hubby jokes about interest in younger women

[Anonymous]

OP, if Zac Efron said hi to you, are you telling me that you wouldn’t chat him up?

I call bs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks, yes. I am not interested when he makes those comments so why would I ramp up our sex life? I would feel gross and know I deserve better. I am not unattractive and even notice men look at me and engage when out running errands etc.. Not often but enough to know that I still got it.

I have already done things like get new lingerie, get dolled up more, but can’t exactly throw on heels and short dress when my daily responsability is lugging around a toddler.

I decided to go to the party and will use that time as the perfect opportunity to call him out immediately (will pull him aside, of course). I am prepared to call an Uber and come home alone to make my point very clear.

Why wait until the party? Talk to him now in a calm moment so it’s not an emotional shitshow. Explain how it makes you feel and ask him to change his behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks, yes. I am not interested when he makes those comments so why would I ramp up our sex life? I would feel gross and know I deserve better. I am not unattractive and even notice men look at me and engage when out running errands etc.. Not often but enough to know that I still got it.

I have already done things like get new lingerie, get dolled up more, but can’t exactly throw on heels and short dress when my daily responsability is lugging around a toddler.

I decided to go to the party and will use that time as the perfect opportunity to call him out immediately (will pull him aside, of course). I am prepared to call an Uber and come home alone to make my point very clear.

Why wait until the party? Talk to him now in a calm moment so it’s not an emotional shitshow. Explain how it makes you feel and ask him to change his behavior.

+1. I don’t think that at the party it’s a good idea.. you will be angry... possibly alcohol in the mix. It might turn out into a huge embarrassing fight. Also, how can you wait? Just talk to your husband and make it a big deal

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That’s how most men in their 40s+ think. He’s just too stupid to hide it from you...or he just doesn’t respect you enough to hide it. Who doesn’t want a younger hotter woman (at least for a night)?

Maybe for a night, but then who wants to live with some bubbleheaded girl?

[Anonymous]

Tell his fat a$$ to go for it. He will come crawling back, begging you for forgiveness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That’s how most men in their 40s+ think. He’s just too stupid to hide it from you...or he just doesn’t respect you enough to hide it. Who doesn’t want a younger hotter woman (at least for a night)?

Maybe for a night, but then who wants to live with some bubbleheaded girl?

Why do older women call younger ones bubbleheaded? Jealousy because not matter how hard you try you will never look as good? Why? There can be young, beautiful, smart and mature women out there (just like there are plenty frumpy, immature older women out there). I was 26 when I met my DH and his girlfriends were telling him that I was immature just because I was 10-15 years younger than all of them. After 8 years (and 3 kids later) now they all like me and enjoy my company... I have never felt different from them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That’s how most men in their 40s+ think. He’s just too stupid to hide it from you...or he just doesn’t respect you enough to hide it. Who doesn’t want a younger hotter woman (at least for a night)?

Maybe for a night, but then who wants to live with some bubbleheaded girl?

Works for Derek jeter

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re husband is going to get himself fired.

This.

+1

I know someone like this, OP. He is in a midlife crisis, and he is disrespectful to his wife. In fact, his father was the same way, in his way (his father was never home and always, always dismissed his mother - great example for the kids!). The wife (my friend) is hot and gets noticed every time we are out, even if it is just at Starbucks. She is not gorgeous, but she gets a lot of attention, and she is very sweet - basically, she could have anyone she wants. Here is the clincher with this type of guy - he appears "perfect" to outsiders, but is an SOB at home. I would say he started acting like a cad around the time the kids came along. Again, probably very much like his cad father did. I am sorry you are going through this OP. It is just a matter of time before someone sweeps you away, if he is not careful. And believe me, when he does his flirty thing with other women, he looks like an ass. Everyone in the neighborhood and school rolls their eyes at this guy I mention, they know his schtick. Ew. It is him feeling bad about himself, one way or the other. It has nothing to do with you. He sounds like a petulant child.

[Anonymous]

PP here. To add, if the guy I mention last post were to ever end up with anyone else (he won't women are generally smarter than that), he would pull the same crap. I know he is an abusive a-hole at home, my friend tells me everything. I will never look at him the same again. Trust me when I say it is definitely not you.

[Anonymous]

OP, "younger" is an unimportant detail. He is being disrespectful. This isn't likely to change based on anything you say. You are fine they way you are. You are enough. Do up-your-game re: frequency of sex-- at least 1x/week .. make that your biggest priority. If he's going to cheat, he will, it's not about you. It would mean he's a huge loser.

[Anonymous]

well op no marriage is perfect but you deserve better than this. I'm generally a 'divorce is only for the three A's' person, especially when kids are involved, but i don't think i could put up with your prick of a dh. i would, at a minimum, tell him you need either couple's counseling or a trial separation until he can grow up. he needs to understand that by the time he 'gets it out of his system' you may have found a better man.

[Anonymous]

My first adult boyfriend was like this. He turned out to have a serious porn addiction, and was a sex offender.

[Anonymous]

Your dh is not respecting you; a couple friends who had this same behavior happen ended up divorcing because their dh did eventually have affairs in them. What your dh was doing was the early warning that the affairs would start to happen in a few years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My first adult boyfriend was like this. He turned out to have a serious porn addiction, and was a sex offender.

+1

That's like saying your DH only visits "Ashley Madison" because he wants "some young thing" instead of you - and excuses it. How can someone put up with that awful behavior? What else will he do, and try to minimize?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re husband is going to get himself fired.

Divorce him and get alimony while he still has a job