would you move to bentonville ak?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people screaming no because of the supposed lack of diversity are probably just as narrow minded and insular in their own way as the those they judge for living in non-diverse places

OP, only way to find out if you'd like Bentonville is to actually move there. Go for a visit as a test. Just as with everything else in life, some people will love it, others will hate it. Some people don't mind being a liberal minority just as others don't mind being a conservative minority, while the reverses would hate it. Some people will walk through life feeling that they're being judged and stared at all the time for not being the conventional stereotype of the area, others will quickly find their peers (LGBT, Jewish, atheist, liberals, artists, etc) in the same area and never look back. Others simply don't care and happily live their life the way they want.

- Said the generic garden variety looking white person

np. The criticism holds regardless of what you look like. You think diversity is something that others should seek, but not you.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL I love how people are trying to negate our actual experiences as an intercultural and interracial family that has lived all over. You're not entitled to insist we're wrong. It's our experience. It's not something I'll subject my kids to.

A person's experiences are also processed and internalized specific to each person. Doesn't meant your perceptions are factual.

Yes, racism and narrow-minded right-wing provincial attitudes of others and their words and actions are just others' "perceptions." They don't exist at all in your experience, so they can't be "factual."

No one said there aren't racists and narrow-minded people in this world; but it's true that everyone's past, personality, experiences, etc form a lens through which we process and internalize information and experiences. You are being very dismissive of people from another state and indicating that everyone there is racist and narrow-minded. That's not factual.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL I love how people are trying to negate our actual experiences as an intercultural and interracial family that has lived all over. You're not entitled to insist we're wrong. It's our experience. It's not something I'll subject my kids to.

A person's experiences are also processed and internalized specific to each person. Doesn't meant your perceptions are factual.

Yes, racism and narrow-minded right-wing provincial attitudes of others and their words and actions are just others' "perceptions." They don't exist at all in your experience, so they can't be "factual."

No one said there aren't racists and narrow-minded people in this world; but it's true that everyone's past, personality, experiences, etc form a lens through which we process and internalize information and experiences. You are being very dismissive of people from another state and indicating that everyone there is racist and narrow-minded. That's not factual.

Your logic is terminally twisted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL I love how people are trying to negate our actual experiences as an intercultural and interracial family that has lived all over. You're not entitled to insist we're wrong. It's our experience. It's not something I'll subject my kids to.

A person's experiences are also processed and internalized specific to each person. Doesn't meant your perceptions are factual.

Yes, racism and narrow-minded right-wing provincial attitudes of others and their words and actions are just others' "perceptions." They don't exist at all in your experience, so they can't be "factual."

No one said there aren't racists and narrow-minded people in this world; but it's true that everyone's past, personality, experiences, etc form a lens through which we process and internalize information and experiences. You are being very dismissive of people from another state and indicating that everyone there is racist and narrow-minded. That's not factual.

Your logic is terminally twisted.

[Anonymous]

Babe. I’m back. Find your own thread for the racism crap.

As for Bentonville, AR, constant threat of Tornados during the season is one more thing to consider.

[Anonymous]

Nope. As a lesbian family we would not go. Where we live now is racially/ethnically?SES diverse (DC's school is 50% AA, 20% Hispanic, 15% white, 10% Asian, and 5% other - 30% FARMS.) We value the diversity of the school and our neighborhood (our neighborhood mirrors the school population pretty closely.)

Where we live now, the fact that we are a 2 mom family isn't a big deal - kids are in and out of out house. Kids are spending the night most weekends. We are just another family in the neighborhood - even though we are the only same-sex family in our neighborhood and school (that we know of - and we are pretty active in school/neighborhood.) In the south (where I am from) there is a lot more wariness of families that are (seemingly) different from others. People are polite, but confused, cautious, and there is a thread of "needing to be saved" by the church running through most relationships.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope. As a lesbian family we would not go. Where we live now is racially/ethnically?SES diverse (DC's school is 50% AA, 20% Hispanic, 15% white, 10% Asian, and 5% other - 30% FARMS.) We value the diversity of the school and our neighborhood (our neighborhood mirrors the school population pretty closely.)

Where we live now, the fact that we are a 2 mom family isn't a big deal - kids are in and out of out house. Kids are spending the night most weekends. We are just another family in the neighborhood - even though we are the only same-sex family in our neighborhood and school (that we know of - and we are pretty active in school/neighborhood.) In the south (where I am from) there is a lot more wariness of families that are (seemingly) different from others. People are polite, but confused, cautious, and there is a thread of "needing to be saved" by the church running through most relationships.

I know LBGT families with children in Atlanta and Athens. They are happy. I will agree that things might be a bit more challenging but the country is changing rapidly even in the flyover states and the South that what might have been the case even 10 years ago is less of an issue. Nonetheless, there’s no questioning the virtues of being in a strong and large and tolerant community like DC. But that doesn’t mean different people can thrive in more “challenging” locations. It really comes down to the individual and their expectations and tolerance.

[Anonymous]

I know really happy minority and LGBT families in Fayetteville, not too far away, which is where the flagship university of Arkansas campus is located. It's very much a college town--so it skews younger and progressive. I think the commute is about 30-40 mins driving, so it's do-able.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nope. As a lesbian family we would not go. Where we live now is racially/ethnically?SES diverse (DC's school is 50% AA, 20% Hispanic, 15% white, 10% Asian, and 5% other - 30% FARMS.) We value the diversity of the school and our neighborhood (our neighborhood mirrors the school population pretty closely.)

Where we live now, the fact that we are a 2 mom family isn't a big deal - kids are in and out of out house. Kids are spending the night most weekends. We are just another family in the neighborhood - even though we are the only same-sex family in our neighborhood and school (that we know of - and we are pretty active in school/neighborhood.) In the south (where I am from) there is a lot more wariness of families that are (seemingly) different from others. People are polite, but confused, cautious, and there is a thread of "needing to be saved" by the church running through most relationships.

I know LBGT families with children in Atlanta and Athens. They are happy. I will agree that things might be a bit more challenging but the country is changing rapidly even in the flyover states and the South that what might have been the case even 10 years ago is less of an issue. Nonetheless, there’s no questioning the virtues of being in a strong and large and tolerant community like DC. But that doesn’t mean different people can thrive in more “challenging” locations. It really comes down to the individual and their expectations and tolerance.

+1 Actually, the stats the PP posted about her kids' school are very similar to the demographic stats of many Atlanta area schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Babe. I’m back. Find your own thread for the racism crap.

As for Bentonville, AR, constant threat of Tornados during the season is one more thing to consider.

Racism is not.

[Anonymous]

OP here, thanks for the diverse responses. Dont want to derail this thread into simply about racism/diversity/bigotry/etc. A couple of thoughts the thread did spark though. We are currently in a pretty non-economically/racially diverse neighborhood and school (we are not in DC anymore). It is a liberal and tolerant culture, overall, but as in many urban centers, there is a lot of granular, neighborhod by neighborhood segregation. DH and I grew up and lived in extremely diverse cities so it's new to us. I suspect AR would be even more segregated but I really dont know. It is important to me to live in a place that is tolerant of diverse viewpoints and lifestyles.

I took a look at some of those houses. Holy moly, we could put away serious cash for a while. On the other hand, the idea of living in some of those houses seemed pretty foreign to me, though I suppose we could adapt to a "great room" .

the outdoor stuff looks beautiful.

I think the biggest issue is that it would be very hard for DH--he would work from home or commute and I think it would be harder for him to integrate socially if we are not part of walmart or church.

I asked the one person I know who lives there (she moved a couple years ago) . Her DH is high up in walmart, so they have a built in social life--but it is around country clubs, charity stuff, etc. Her kids are nearly grown so she hasn't really had to deal with schools from the early years, but said that her kids had no trouble doing the last 2 years of high school there, made friends, etc. Said it is strange to have gone from a place where you assume/are surrounded by people with more similar values to a place where folks are generally much more conservative political, pro-life etc and she says it feels like that's a barrier to making deep friendships for her, but that she has met a lot of lovely people. They do not consider it long term, 5 years or so, and then another move.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know really happy minority and LGBT families in Fayetteville, not too far away, which is where the flagship university of Arkansas campus is located. It's very much a college town--so it skews younger and progressive. I think the commute is about 30-40 mins driving, so it's do-able.

+1 Yes, I have two gay friends (late 20's) who live in Fayetteville.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The people screaming no because of the supposed lack of diversity are probably just as narrow minded and insular in their own way as the those they judge for living in non-diverse places

OP, only way to find out if you'd like Bentonville is to actually move there. Go for a visit as a test. Just as with everything else in life, some people will love it, others will hate it. Some people don't mind being a liberal minority just as others don't mind being a conservative minority, while the reverses would hate it. Some people will walk through life feeling that they're being judged and stared at all the time for not being the conventional stereotype of the area, others will quickly find their peers (LGBT, Jewish, atheist, liberals, artists, etc) in the same area and never look back. Others simply don't care and happily live their life the way they want.

Its not that simple. I am Jewish and lived in a deep south metro area, pop around a million, Jewish community around 10,000. That makes for a small, almost claustrophobic Jewish community. Worse in that I was single at the time, and the dating pool was quite small (esp looking for someone who was Jewish AND was otherwise compatible). Plus not much in the way of Jewish cultural activities, outside the handful of synagogues. I didn't like the lack of cultural resources (yes there were two museums, both easily done in about an hour - there was ONE halfway decent bookstore, and that was back when no one had heard of Amazon) and was uncomfortable with the deep south (and the bland transplants didn't help that much). I made it through 3 years, and split.

I do encourage the OP to visit, and to ask about details. Might or might not make sense to move, depending on how easy it would be to get a new job elsewhere quickly if that was the choice.

[Anonymous]

Everyone either works for WMT or works for companies doing business with WM. It's a one company town in the middle of nowhere. If that appeals to you go for it.

[Anonymous]

never