No one eats in this house

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Nancy, I'm a bit hungry. Do you mind if I make a plate from the lunch leftovers, or would you rather I eat something else?"

I said that around 7:30pm and was told "we just ate! No need for that!"

Omg. Rude hosts.

Wow! I'd probably leave and go get something to eat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The Italian mother in me is horrified to hear that people are hungry.

Are all these people not feeding you nordic Europeans? Irish?

I can't imagine having guests in your house, and not offering them a staggering amount of food.

If you don't have a ton of leftovers after Christmas that means you didn't do it right.

Italians are the best hosts! Out of all the European cultures here in America Italians are the only ones who actually feed people and are hospitable to guests. It is definitely a quality that other white folks lack. There have been numerous threads on DCUM about white people in the northeast not feeding guests. Why do people invite people over their homes and refuse to feed them? In my culture its considered rude to not provide meals for house guests. It will hurt me to know that a person is starving at my house.

Have you ever been to the South? You're not going hungry at a Southern home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The Italian mother in me is horrified to hear that people are hungry.

Are all these people not feeding you nordic Europeans? Irish?

I can't imagine having guests in your house, and not offering them a staggering amount of food.

If you don't have a ton of leftovers after Christmas that means you didn't do it right.

Hey now! Irish people would have fed op! Sure, all the food would have had the flavor boiled out of it, but she'd have been fed . Actually, she'd probably have been offered some tea and cookies at least.

[Anonymous]

Lordy, we do not have this issue on either side of the family. I also don't get not just going out by yourselves if there's nothing in the house. And if it were my in-laws my DH would be shuffling in their cabinets for me. So what if people bitch? They'll get over it.

[Anonymous]

I am the Filet O Fish poster from the other thread, and I am sitting at MIL’s starving right now. Christmas breakfast was coffee and cinnamon rolls from a can. Thankfully we are going to FIL’s wife’s family’s Christmas lunch at noon - they put out a beautiful holiday spread.

[Anonymous]

Meanwhile, at my parents house, it’s not that there isn’t food or they don’t eat, it’s that most of the food is the packaged, processed and frozen - hardly any fresh food. They think that it saves time and tastes the same, but it doesn’t. And when it’s noticed that I’m not eating much, there are comments, always with the comments. I can’t tell you how many times I‘ve mentioned that I’m resticted to x amount of calories per so that’s why I’m not eating very much and well, the offerings are bland and unhealthy...

/rant

[Anonymous]

I'm the starving in Suffolk, VA poster with expired eggs and canned food.

I'll address the questions posted earlier
- in laws are Irish and English (but I think mostly just American? Ancestors came 200 years ago)
- they really try to be nice but it seems the atmosphere is just more rigid and tense (not something I have ever experienced before but I'm really trying to be a nice house guest)
- this is my 2nd Christmas with them, and I want to have a good relationship so maybe I've been more accommodating than normal due to the respect your elders mantra drilled in to me
- we are driving to a grocery store 1 hour away to go shopping at an Open that is open!
- husband had a chat with his parents and said he's been hungry for 2 days now and we will bring fresh food home. His parents seemed confused but they want us to be comfortable so they said to please bring anything home that we like and his mom even gave me a list of things she needed. All in all a merry Christmas!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The Italian mother in me is horrified to hear that people are hungry.

Are all these people not feeding you nordic Europeans? Irish?

I can't imagine having guests in your house, and not offering them a staggering amount of food.

If you don't have a ton of leftovers after Christmas that means you didn't do it right.

Italians are the best hosts! Out of all the European cultures here in America Italians are the only ones who actually feed people and are hospitable to guests. It is definitely a quality that other white folks lack. There have been numerous threads on DCUM about white people in the northeast not feeding guests. Why do people invite people over their homes and refuse to feed them? In my culture its considered rude to not provide meals for house guests. It will hurt me to know that a person is starving at my house.

Have you ever been to the South? You're not going hungry at a Southern home.

Yeah whoa let’s not generalize. My family and dhs is Jewish. At his parents house there is never food and dinner is tiny servings since his parents are older and don’t eat much and keep trim (they just forget that others need more even their son). When I was pregnant and breastfeeding I politely reminded them before dinner that eat for two and also snacked before I went. At my parents house there is always too much food and when we stop by between meals there is tea and snacks and it’s considerd utterly rude to refuse. Each has its annoyance.

[Anonymous]

Overall question is: Are you a guest who ought to be served? Or, is there the expectation that you will meet your own needs, somehow - and in that case the host should tell you how.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Italians are the best hosts! Out of all the European cultures here in America Italians are the only ones who actually feed people and are hospitable to guests. It is definitely a quality that other white folks lack. There have been numerous threads on DCUM about white people in the northeast not feeding guests. Why do people invite people over their homes and refuse to feed them? In my culture its considered rude to not provide meals for house guests. It will hurt me to know that a person is starving at my house.

Eastern Europeans will feed the crap out of you til you can't walk. Whenever my American husband and I visit my family, they put out a million things at each meal, constantly ask if we are hungry between meals, and remark repeatedly about how my husband doesn't eat anything (he eats normally, is neither over or underweight). If a guest says one time that they like something, they will be offered that thing at virtually meal, in addition to whatever is otherwise being served, and then be encouraged to take several servings of it home if they did not consume them during the visit.

[Anonymous]

My MIL runs a eating disordered household. I havevtaken to showing up with a bucket of chicken. Another good technique isbto fasten on something they have in her region or city that you can't get at home. Wherebwe live there's no trader joes so I always make a point of having to have certain yummies from trsder joes so i can go and get them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My MIL runs a eating disordered household. I havevtaken to showing up with a bucket of chicken. Another good technique isbto fasten on something they have in her region or city that you can't get at home. Wherebwe live there's no trader joes so I always make a point of having to have certain yummies from trsder joes so i can go and get them

Yep. If they’re from the northeast just make a big deal about how NY/NJ/CT pizza is the best and we can’t get this in dc as an excuse to go get a pizza once a day - at least you’re sure to have a filling meal once a day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am the Filet O Fish poster from the other thread, and I am sitting at MIL’s starving right now. Christmas breakfast was coffee and cinnamon rolls from a can. Thankfully we are going to FIL’s wife’s family’s Christmas lunch at noon - they put out a beautiful holiday spread.

What is your complaint about this? It's not from scratch (or low carb) but they're yummy and filling/high calorie. Was it not enough, or just not what you wanted?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the Filet O Fish poster from the other thread, and I am sitting at MIL’s starving right now. Christmas breakfast was coffee and cinnamon rolls from a can. Thankfully we are going to FIL’s wife’s family’s Christmas lunch at noon - they put out a beautiful holiday spread.

What is your complaint about this? It's not from scratch (or low carb) but they're yummy and filling/high calorie. Was it not enough, or just not what you wanted?

NP. High calorie? Yes. Filling? No. Cinammon rolls or similar items need some protein to actually make it a meal with some staying power. Doesn't have to be much--a hard-boiled egg, some cheese, some yogurt. Cinammon rolls and coffee, while tasting good, will do nothing other than spike your blood sugar, crash it, and leave you hungry an hour later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am the Filet O Fish poster from the other thread, and I am sitting at MIL’s starving right now. Christmas breakfast was coffee and cinnamon rolls from a can. Thankfully we are going to FIL’s wife’s family’s Christmas lunch at noon - they put out a beautiful holiday spread.

What is your complaint about this? It's not from scratch (or low carb) but they're yummy and filling/high calorie. Was it not enough, or just not what you wanted?

Not the PP, but just a cinnamon roll with no possibility of an egg or some such is just going to leave my head-achy and angry within an hour. In my Irish American family, very little is offered (and it's worse now as my parents get older and eat less themselves) and then you're never supposed to finish any food you are offered. I always bring snacks and food for my child.