Friend Picks Very Expensive Restaurant for Birthday Dinner.

[Anonymous]

She is definitely being rude by selecting such a pricey restaurant.
Common sense should dictate that she select a more moderately priced place.

Be upfront + honest w/her.
Let her know that you checked your expenses and there is just no way that you can afford to spend so much on your friend’s pick.

Then suggest a less expensive place.

Any good friend would completely understand.

[Anonymous]

Rude her BF better pay!!

[Anonymous]

So rude. Tell her it's out of your budget and you were thinking more along the lines of x. Why are you paying for bf too?

[Anonymous]

Well, you did extend the invitation.

Question: Might she think you're flush?

[Anonymous]

Why are you expected to foot the bill for her AND her boyfriend?

In any case, this is not a friend so you can cancel dinner and the friendship and move on with life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Funny, I have a friend who celebrates her birthday by TREATING all of her friends to dinner at some fancy place she's always wanted to try. We argue about the bill, but the most she's ever let us do is pay the tip. And I think she still tipped on top of our contribution.

This is what I did for my 40th. Took a bunch of friends out to dinner. They all tried to pay, of course, but I wasn't having it. We all had a great time.

[Anonymous]

Your gift is fun! As with any situation, communication and honesty is best! Simply let her know that it's not affordable for you--maybe she can use Yelp to choose one with two $$ signs? I do agree that it's better manners to choose something moderate when someone is treating you. One way to avoid it in the future is for you to name three choices from which a friend can choose. Praying for you to find the right words to be honest with her rather than spend what isn't affordable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why are you expected to foot the bill for her AND her boyfriend?

In any case, this is not a friend so you can cancel dinner and the friendship and move on with life.

I would be inclined to have something come up and cancel taking her out entirely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Funny, I have a friend who celebrates her birthday by TREATING all of her friends to dinner at some fancy place she's always wanted to try. We argue about the bill, but the most she's ever let us do is pay the tip. And I think she still tipped on top of our contribution.

This is what I did for my 40th. Took a bunch of friends out to dinner. They all tried to pay, of course, but I wasn't having it. We all had a great time.

That is what respectable people do. You throw the party, you pay. We took our friends to a great French place and then wine tasting in Va. few years back. We also provided a limo. What kind of child sticks their friends with the tab in this instance. Get this tool out of your life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You just need to say it is too expensive for you too. I hope she was kidding. That would be incredibly rude to take advantage of you as her "friend". No real friend would do that

I would totally take this suggestion! And say it while you are laughing lol. In all seriousness though, she should reconsider. Tell her you love her while you’re saying it ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does she think you're her fairy godmother?

Or Oprah?

WTF is it with certain kinds of people trying to count other peoples' money? JFC -- the epitome of rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You just need to say it is too expensive for you too. I hope she was kidding. That would be incredibly rude to take advantage of you as her "friend". No real friend would do that

I would totally take this suggestion! And say it while you are laughing lol. In all seriousness though, she should reconsider. Tell her you love her while you’re saying it ?

You’re 2 years late to this conversation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friends bday is coming up and we offered to take her out for dinner on her bday and of course she can pick where. She informs us that she's always wanted to try a restaurant but it's too expensive, so that is where she wants us to take her and her boyfriend.

I checked the menu and with wine, cocktails, dessert, tip etc. I imagine the bill is going to be almost $400-$500 and add more for Uber or parking - which is a lot for us. I am stunned, it seems rude. But I am not sure if I am being cheap or a sucker. What would you do?

You are not being cheap. She, however, is a douchebag,! I would tell her that it also too expensive for you and give her three restaurants to choose among. This is beyond rude and I would drop her as a friend,!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friends bday is coming up and we offered to take her out for dinner on her bday and of course she can pick where. She informs us that she's always wanted to try a restaurant but it's too expensive, so that is where she wants us to take her and her boyfriend.

I checked the menu and with wine, cocktails, dessert, tip etc. I imagine the bill is going to be almost $400-$500 and add more for Uber or parking - which is a lot for us. I am stunned, it seems rude. But I am not sure if I am being cheap or a sucker. What would you do?

Per person?

[Anonymous]

I don’t see what the big deal is. When we go out with other couples we always just take turns paying. This is basically the same thing. When it’s your birthday they’ll pay. Typical DCUM getting into hysterics about a normal thing.