Husband won't cut grass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Curious how others would handle this situation:

I'm a SAHM with young kids (one not yet walking.) My husband works long hours, sometimes not returning home until 7-8pm. Getting him to cut he grass is like pulling teeth. On his days off, he doesn't want to do it. "I'll do it tomorrow." But that never happens. Meanwhile, the kids can't even play in the backyard because the grass is so tall. He won't let me hire a lawn service, even though all of our neighbors use the same service, because he's so cheap. I can't cut it while he's at work, because I'm alone with the kids. If I attempt to cut the grass myself when he's home, he gets upset and ends up cutting it himself, but is mad and pouts the rest of the night.

It always gets cut before it looks horrible, the in the meantime, we can't enjoy our yard.

Do I hire a lawn service and be done with it? He will be mad.

Do I try and coordinate the kids naps and cut it myself while they sleep? He will be mad.

I'm so over it.

Purchase a play mower for your child who is walking. Put the non-walking child in a backpack or front pack carrier. Mow the lawn with your walking child mowing behind you. Put noise cancelling headphones on your non-walking child. It is okay if you do it halves, thirds or fourths.

Please do not do this, OP. Apparently this poster is unaware that even lawn mowers with debris guards can still kick out rocks, sticks or other objects that fly at high speed and can hit the kid who's pretending to mow or the one in a carrier. Ever been hit by something spat out by a mower? It's hard enough to injure an adult. Imagine a piece of gravel hitting a kid's head at that speed. Even if the kid is walking behind mom--that's not going to provide much safety.

Not all chores are appropriate ones for turning into games for the kids.

[Anonymous]

Wife: The grass needs to be mowed. If you don't get to it this weekend, I'll do it on monday.
Husband doesn't get to it.
Wife does it on monday.
Husband is grouchy.
Wife: The grass needed to be mowed. I did it. It will need to be mowed again this weekend. If you don't get to it, I'll do it on monday.
And if he continues to grouse, walk away. The first time perhaps say if he has a legitimate suggestion for solving the problem, and not just complaining, you're happy to have a conversation about it. Otherwise, no one needs to listen to pointless complaining.

I put my kids who were too young or impulsive to listen in a play yard or a pack-n-play while I mowed the lawn. A child old enough to listen to me got the task of collecting all the toys scattered around the lawn or all the sticks or sweeping up grass clippings.

[Anonymous]

Tell DH how often the lawn needs to be mowed, and starting on which date (all your choice since he's not interested in dealing with the lawn). Ask him to decide who will do it - you, him, or a service. He has 2 mins to make a decision. Then hold to it, no complaints, otherwise the next day you book a service and don't tell him about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would go ahead and hire the lawn service. You need to position it as a temporary thing for this summer, saying that your kids need to play outside and you want both of you to be able to enjoy the time with family. Say you can reevaluate next season.

+1

[Anonymous]

Cut it on the weekend and have him watch the kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wife: The grass needs to be mowed. If you don't get to it this weekend, I'll do it on monday.
Husband doesn't get to it.
Wife does it on monday.
Husband is grouchy.
Wife: The grass needed to be mowed. I did it. It will need to be mowed again this weekend. If you don't get to it, I'll do it on monday.
And if he continues to grouse, walk away. The first time perhaps say if he has a legitimate suggestion for solving the problem, and not just complaining, you're happy to have a conversation about it. Otherwise, no one needs to listen to pointless complaining.

I put my kids who were too young or impulsive to listen in a play yard or a pack-n-play while I mowed the lawn. A child old enough to listen to me got the task of collecting all the toys scattered around the lawn or all the sticks or sweeping up grass clippings.

My variation would be that on the second round I'd say, "If you don't get to it, I'm calling a lawn service."

[Anonymous]

Is this the only thing he is a jerk about, OP?

[Anonymous]

I'd be cutting it myself. The kids can cry out the window at you, watching for 30 minutes until you are done. Even better if DH is home.

[Anonymous]

Can you hire a neighborhood kid? It's cheaper than a lawn service and you can explain it away as helping a neighbor.

[Anonymous]

He sounds pretty controlling. lay out his options and let him choose. He mows it once a week, or you can do it while he watches the kids, or you will hire a service. You have small kids and they want to play in the yard.

How can he cancel the service if you book it? I would be livid if my husband did something like that. Our service is cheap, I think we pay 30 bucks a week. Maybe you'll can hire a neighborhood kid to mow for you, or act as a mothers helper while you mow. A middle schooler can play with your kids for 20 mins while you cut the grass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He sounds pretty controlling. lay out his options and let him choose. He mows it once a week, or you can do it while he watches the kids, or you will hire a service. You have small kids and they want to play in the yard.

How can he cancel the service if you book it? I would be livid if my husband did something like that. Our service is cheap, I think we pay 30 bucks a week. Maybe you'll can hire a neighborhood kid to mow for you, or act as a mothers helper while you mow. A middle schooler can play with your kids for 20 mins while you cut the grass.

How does he sound controlling? You can't control someone who doesn't allow themselves to be controlled. Apparently OP is a pushover who would rather complain about it than act on a solution.

[Anonymous]

One of the best things about being a working mom is that no one else gets to tell me how to spend my money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

It always gets cut before it looks horrible,

Stop nagging him and take the kids to a park when it is "too long to enjoy"... I am not even sure what that means. We live next to woods and we always are in long grass.

This. Op, you contradict yourself and came across as a complete nag. Lay off.

[Anonymous]

Just hire a lawn service. $25-$35 every two weeks - done! Cheaper than eating out and saves everyone's sanity!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One of the best things about being a working mom is that no one else gets to tell me how to spend my money.

Smugness is unbecoming.
~a working, married woman without kids.