Received a pre-printed generic thank you card

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:give the woman a rest.

she just had a baby and she has to hand write you a thank you card and go after old papers to find the correct spelling for your daughter's name??????

wtf??????????

I bet you would be here complaining if the thank you note was written by hand with the wrong spelling.

gosh!

Nope, wouldn't complain about that at all. She can't remember my daughters name? I just sent her kid a gift!

I am OP and I did not write the above response. I would not have minded if she spelled my daughter's name wrong, but it was just printed "Mr. and Mrs. "smith" and daughter". No name. It kindof makes me think she didnt do them at all and her mom just sent them out. Again, I dont really care - just curious about the etiquitte of the practice, but dont like it when it seems that someone else is responding for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Rather, I should say you address it to all of them (but hte address on the outside is the "leader" so to speak). When addressing a group thank you.

I disagree. Each person who went in on the gift and took the time to sign the card gets a personal thank you. Group thank yous addressed to your main contact are appropriate for things like flowers when the company and not the people are paying for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would gladly forgo ever receiving another gift in my entire life if it meant I didn't have to write another thank you note.

I hate hate hate stuff. I live in a small house. I am not good at organizing it. I don't NEED it. I get no thrill out of receiving presents from anyone who is not a family member. My baby does not need 8 pairs of Robeez. It's bad for the environment. And it means I have to write eight letters for something I didn't want in the first place. I will not check back because I know everyone will flame me as an ungrateful bitch, and maybe I am, but god it feels good to get this off my chest.

I am glad you feel good for getting if off your chest and yes, you do sound like one of the most ungrateful people I have ever heard of. It just reminds me what can happen to people when they are given too much. You are actually complaining about people giving stuff to you! Amazing! Oh, the burden of having to write a note of thanks or to find a way to dispose of the gift. Here's an idea- take it to the nearest homeless shelter and give it to kids who don't have anything. Sell it on Ebay and give the profits to a charity. It's important to remember how much happiness it brings a lot of people to give gifts and maybe, just maybe you can muster up some joy from realizing that you are bringing them happiness by graciously accepting the gift. Or would that be too much trouble?

[Anonymous]

Why is the woman in charge of sending the thank notes? Do people get mad when men don't send thank you notes? My office tries to be green, a phone call or an e-mail thank you is fine. Who made up these dumb rules, anyway?

[Anonymous]

Sure it's polite to thank people for gifts -- no argument there. I really hate it though when I hear about gift givers "keeping score" about who failed to send a thank-you, how long certain thank-you's took, and whether the thank-you took the "proper" form (call vs. note vs. email vs. singing telegram). Or worse yet, keeping score on whether the next gift you receive is comparable to the last gift you gave to that person ("I gave her a $100 pepper mill, and she only got me a $35 picture frame! What nerve!") If you're truly giving a gift, then you should be giving the gift out of a sense of kindness and generosity, and should not be keeping score. If you're keeping score, then you're not giving in the right spirit, IMHO. Yes, it's wonderful to get a thank-you, but you've got no right to expect it, or worse yet demand it.

I know this opinion probably puts me in a minority, but after reading the thread I wanted to toss in my two cents, since maybe others have a similar view. If you are offended by my opinion, please don't bother flaming me for it, since I don't really plan on returning to the thread or engaging in any of the heated debate that many on DCUM love so much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would gladly forgo ever receiving another gift in my entire life if it meant I didn't have to write another thank you note.

I hate hate hate stuff. I live in a small house. I am not good at organizing it. I don't NEED it. I get no thrill out of receiving presents from anyone who is not a family member. My baby does not need 8 pairs of Robeez. It's bad for the environment. And it means I have to write eight letters for something I didn't want in the first place. I will not check back because I know everyone will flame me as an ungrateful bitch, and maybe I am, but god it feels good to get this off my chest.

I am glad you feel good for getting if off your chest and yes, you do sound like one of the most ungrateful people I have ever heard of. It just reminds me what can happen to people when they are given too much. You are actually complaining about people giving stuff to you! Amazing! Oh, the burden of having to write a note of thanks or to find a way to dispose of the gift. Here's an idea- take it to the nearest homeless shelter and give it to kids who don't have anything. Sell it on Ebay and give the profits to a charity. It's important to remember how much happiness it brings a lot of people to give gifts and maybe, just maybe you can muster up some joy from realizing that you are bringing them happiness by graciously accepting the gift. Or would that be too much trouble?

You are such a prig.

[Anonymous]

"Every newborn I have ever met sleeps for extraordinary amounts of time every single day. some may cry a lot, but they also sleep for like, what, 20 hour a day, day after day, for weeks. "

Are you drinking? I have never met a new mom who said I am so bored and have nothing to do because my newborn sleeps 20 hours day. Unless are one of those moms with a 24/7 baby nurse and no BF, this isn't the norm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Every newborn I have ever met sleeps for extraordinary amounts of time every single day. some may cry a lot, but they also sleep for like, what, 20 hour a day, day after day, for weeks. "

Are you drinking? I have never met a new mom who said I am so bored and have nothing to do because my newborn sleeps 20 hours day. Unless are one of those moms with a 24/7 baby nurse and no BF, this isn't the norm.

Actually, my DD slept that much as a newborn, and I did not have a baby nurse. I breastfed, too. She'd sleep four hours, nurse, poop, pass right back out, rinse, repeat. For weeks! I though I was going to go out of my mind with boredom, especially because with the C section I wasn't supposed to drive for two weeks and the weather wasn't good enough to walk anywhere interesting. AAARRRGHH! Plenty of parents checked my DD over to see if she was really a doll, because she just never seemed to wake up. Got lots of notes done then.

BUT-- I know that this was not the norm. Colicky babies aren't like that, and of course if it's baby #2, it isn't like that.

BUT, BUT-- my DD isn't allowed to play with a toy until her thank you note is out. Before she could write I'd just have her put a couple of stickers and a scribble on. Now she has to fill it out. If she can do it, anyone can.

Keep blank cards of all kinds in a container in your home desk, along with plenty of stamps. Keep an updated address list. When something comes in, write the note that day. It can be done.

FWIW, I think that if the family had done a generic thank you but a handwritten signature/reference to what the gift was, that'd be fine. Like a family holiday card.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would gladly forgo ever receiving another gift in my entire life if it meant I didn't have to write another thank you note.

I hate hate hate stuff. I live in a small house. I am not good at organizing it. I don't NEED it. I get no thrill out of receiving presents from anyone who is not a family member. My baby does not need 8 pairs of Robeez. It's bad for the environment. And it means I have to write eight letters for something I didn't want in the first place. I will not check back because I know everyone will flame me as an ungrateful bitch, and maybe I am, but god it feels good to get this off my chest.

I am glad you feel good for getting if off your chest and yes, you do sound like one of the most ungrateful people I have ever heard of. It just reminds me what can happen to people when they are given too much. You are actually complaining about people giving stuff to you! Amazing! Oh, the burden of having to write a note of thanks or to find a way to dispose of the gift. Here's an idea- take it to the nearest homeless shelter and give it to kids who don't have anything. Sell it on Ebay and give the profits to a charity. It's important to remember how much happiness it brings a lot of people to give gifts and maybe, just maybe you can muster up some joy from realizing that you are bringing them happiness by graciously accepting the gift. Or would that be too much trouble?

You are such a prig.

Seriously? Name calling? Is that the most mature, effective response you can come up with?

[Anonymous]

I have a genuine question for those who don't regularly write thank you notes or send acknowledgement of any kind- how are you sure that the gift-giver knows you received their gift? Yes, you can send it certified mail or UPS or whatever but that doesn't tell you 100% that someone received something. I had a friend who had several wedding gifts taken from her front porch a few years ago even though UPS had said they delivered it. I mean, if for nothing else, wouldn't you want to let the person know their present arrived safe and sound so they're not wondering? I always send some sort of acknowledgement- not only cause it's the respectful thing to do but if for nothing else, the person knows I got it!

[Anonymous]

wow you are a tough "friend"

[Anonymous]

I spent some of my wedding evening writing thank you notes in our hotel room and had sent them all within 72 hours. Relatives were moved.

[Anonymous]

I'm kind of a stickler about thank you notes too. I spend a lot of time searching for the right gift so it would be upsetting to me if it wasn't acknowledged in a personal way, even if just a few lines. If the gift recipient verbally thanked me I would not expect a card at all. And I do cut some slack for the hectic post-partum period. But I always write thank you notes because I really appreciate it when someone sends me or my children gifts... their thought means a lot to me and I want to convey that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm kind of a stickler about thank you notes too. I spend a lot of time searching for the right gift so it would be upsetting to me if it wasn't acknowledged in a personal way, even if just a few lines. If the gift recipient verbally thanked me I would not expect a card at all. And I do cut some slack for the hectic post-partum period. But I always write thank you notes because I really appreciate it when someone sends me or my children gifts... their thought means a lot to me and I want to convey that.

Hallelujah, it's nice to hear some decent manners! It's not a matter of being a stringent Emily Post follower, it's about being gracious and respectful to someone who did something nice for you. Why is it so hard to acknowledge that? I can't believe some of the responses I've seen on here of people trying to justify why never acknowledging a gift is okay. It's unbelievable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm kind of a stickler about thank you notes too. I spend a lot of time searching for the right gift so it would be upsetting to me if it wasn't acknowledged in a personal way, even if just a few lines. If the gift recipient verbally thanked me I would not expect a card at all. And I do cut some slack for the hectic post-partum period. But I always write thank you notes because I really appreciate it when someone sends me or my children gifts... their thought means a lot to me and I want to convey that.

Hallelujah, it's nice to hear some decent manners! It's not a matter of being a stringent Emily Post follower, it's about being gracious and respectful to someone who did something nice for you. Why is it so hard to acknowledge that? I can't believe some of the responses I've seen on here of people trying to justify why never acknowledging a gift is okay. It's unbelievable.

Exactly. Receiving gifts is not something to take for granted. Appreciative notes are not so much about "proper manners" but basic human kindness.