Orientation with parents in tow

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:16:40 How old is your child? I'm going to orientation in late August and parent's weekend in November but in between my child is on his/her own!

+1. Call your kid frequently to ask about her new friends, how the local pizza joint is, and whether she needs a new winter coat. But don't ask if she's completed that English Lit reading yet.

I would text more than call. It'll work a lot better and elicit a faster response even if it's just a few words. I get more texts than calls. Love it.

I insist on weekly calls because I can pick up on emotion and much better on the phone than by text. You can notice pauses, hesitations, starts and stops, etc. when talking live to someone. We text in between sometimes sure, but those calls happen like clockwork.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:16:40 How old is your child? I'm going to orientation in late August and parent's weekend in November but in between my child is on his/her own!

+1. Call your kid frequently to ask about her new friends, how the local pizza joint is, and whether she needs a new winter coat. But don't ask if she's completed that English Lit reading yet.

I would text more than call. It'll work a lot better and elicit a faster response even if it's just a few words. I get more texts than calls. Love it.

I insist on weekly calls because I can pick up on emotion and much better on the phone than by text. You can notice pauses, hesitations, starts and stops, etc. when talking live to someone. We text in between sometimes sure, but those calls happen like clockwork.

You are one of the more fortunate parent. I ask my DC to call weekly, never insist. I also appreciate the texts I get which are more frequent then calls. I have been introduced to something called facetime by my kid which has been great as I love seeing that face! However, DC is an adult, and I request as many calls and text that I can get but I would never insist or demand. That would, IMHO, cause resentment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:16:40 How old is your child? I'm going to orientation in late August and parent's weekend in November but in between my child is on his/her own!

+1. Call your kid frequently to ask about her new friends, how the local pizza joint is, and whether she needs a new winter coat. But don't ask if she's completed that English Lit reading yet.

I would text more than call. It'll work a lot better and elicit a faster response even if it's just a few words. I get more texts than calls. Love it.

I insist on weekly calls because I can pick up on emotion and much better on the phone than by text. You can notice pauses, hesitations, starts and stops, etc. when talking live to someone. We text in between sometimes sure, but those calls happen like clockwork.

You are one of the more fortunate parent. I ask my DC to call weekly, never insist. I also appreciate the texts I get which are more frequent then calls. I have been introduced to something called facetime by my kid which has been great as I love seeing that face! However, DC is an adult, and I request as many calls and text that I can get but I would never insist or demand. That would, IMHO, cause resentment.

PP again. An example in one week/7 day period, I probably get one call and a bunch of text ranging from 'hey mom' to 'guess what...tried sushi...yum'

Short and sweet. I'll take it!

[Anonymous]

Not surprised to find DMV parents who think their principal role is check writer. These are probably the same folks who had the nanny pick the kids up from car pool line. In fact, the DC is probably still in contact with the nanny that raised him/her.

- Proud to be a PARENT

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not surprised to find DMV parents who think their principal role is check writer. These are probably the same folks who had the nanny pick the kids up from car pool line. In fact, the DC is probably still in contact with the nanny that raised him/her.

- Proud to be a PARENT

Grow up and get off your high horse.

There's more than one way to parent. And if you do it correctly, a Check Writer will be your only role once they're in college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not surprised to find DMV parents who think their principal role is check writer. These are probably the same folks who had the nanny pick the kids up from car pool line. In fact, the DC is probably still in contact with the nanny that raised him/her.

- Proud to be a PARENT

Grow up and get off your high horse.

There's more than one way to parent. And if you do it correctly, a Check Writer will be your only role once they're in college.

+1. Please don't smother your poor kid. Loving parents understand your kid needs to spread his own wings in college. Your kid needs you to recognize and encourage his need for independence - that's what parental love is about!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

+1. Call your kid frequently to ask about her new friends, how the local pizza joint is, and whether she needs a new winter coat. But don't ask if she's completed that English Lit reading yet.

I would text more than call. It'll work a lot better and elicit a faster response even if it's just a few words. I get more texts than calls. Love it.

I insist on weekly calls because I can pick up on emotion and much better on the phone than by text. You can notice pauses, hesitations, starts and stops, etc. when talking live to someone. We text in between sometimes sure, but those calls happen like clockwork.

You are one of the more fortunate parent. I ask my DC to call weekly, never insist. I also appreciate the texts I get which are more frequent then calls. I have been introduced to something called facetime by my kid which has been great as I love seeing that face! However, DC is an adult, and I request as many calls and text that I can get but I would never insist or demand. That would, IMHO, cause resentment.

PP again. An example in one week/7 day period, I probably get one call and a bunch of text ranging from 'hey mom' to 'guess what...tried sushi...yum'

Short and sweet. I'll take it!

I'm the top poster. The whole family Skypes once a week, usually on Sunday although sometimes we skip a week, depending on what DC has going on. We text in between.

[Anonymous]

^^^ PP here. I hope the so-called "PARENT" can see the difference here. We're firmly in the "check writer" camp and we stay out of micromanaging DD's course choices and homework. Yet all of us "check writers" are still very much in touch with, proud of, and close to our maturing kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our school has a separate orientation for the kids and the parents. The parents are not invited to go to the students orientation.

"Our" school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not surprised to find DMV parents who think their principal role is check writer. These are probably the same folks who had the nanny pick the kids up from car pool line. In fact, the DC is probably still in contact with the nanny that raised him/her.

- Proud to be a PARENT

I'm the PP who wrote that I hope I'm just a check writer. I'm a SAHM -- no nanny. Picked my children up every day.

You should check your impulse to assume that someone with a different parenting approach is necessarily wrong, or harming their children. That just shows insecurity over your own choices. The fact is that you are in the minority here. And I suspect you don't have children in college, so you aren't even posting from experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not surprised to find DMV parents who think their principal role is check writer. These are probably the same folks who had the nanny pick the kids up from car pool line. In fact, the DC is probably still in contact with the nanny that raised him/her.

- Proud to be a PARENT

I'm the PP who wrote that I hope I'm just a check writer. I'm a SAHM -- no nanny. Picked my children up every day.

You should check your impulse to assume that someone with a different parenting approach is necessarily wrong, or harming their children. That just shows insecurity over your own choices. The fact is that you are in the minority here. And I suspect you don't have children in college, so you aren't even posting from experience.

+1. The insecurity/defensiveness shows in her insulting word choices, too. I agree, this poster probably doesn't have teens, let alone entered college. Otherwise she'd have more of an appreciation of how proud kids are to make their own decisions, and to make these decisions well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD really wanted us to come to orientation. She wanted one last nice dinner out in her new town, she wanted to find a nail and tanning place, and a Target. Because she knew that when we left, so did the credit card. I advised her on nothing except colors.

I've gotta ask -- your daughter has time for manicures and tanning? Where is this? (Not judging, just honestly curious as this is so very different from my kids' experience or my own from back in the day.

[Anonymous]

Those tanning salons cause cancer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD really wanted us to come to orientation. She wanted one last nice dinner out in her new town, she wanted to find a nail and tanning place, and a Target. Because she knew that when we left, so did the credit card. I advised her on nothing except colors.

I've gotta ask -- your daughter has time for manicures and tanning? Where is this? (Not judging, just honestly curious as this is so very different from my kids' experience or my own from back in the day.

+1. If you can finance this, I'm not judging either. But we're pinching every penny to pay that $60K, and manicures and tans aren't in our budget!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those tanning salons cause cancer.

Spray tans cause cancer? I haven't heard this yet.