NY Times Article by Mother Who Invested in Child vs. Saving for College
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Anonymous
And super annoying. |
Anonymous
YES. |
Anonymous
| I think some of you got a bit sidetracked by the eggs and tent. Yes her attempt at creative story telling that caused her to add those likely true-albeit irrelevant -details is weird. Yet a legitimate issue remains: invest in the kid's NOW or save for his later? |
Anonymous
There should be balance in everything. We opted for investing in "now" but saving enough to fund state flagship. Of course, we live in VA, so "state flagship" is a pretty darn good option, but there is a number of good state colleges where a kid of less-than UVA caliber can do very well. |
Anonymous
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So, my parents did not save for college. My father worked on Wall Street. I couldn't tell you the actual thought process my parents went through, but I think it was along the lines of: we will pay now for a nice life and the rest will work itself out. Also, until my father lost his job, he certainly never contemplated that would happen to him (despite the fact that it happens all the time on wall street).
I went to private school, but by the time I reached my HS years, the tuition payments were a terrible stretch. My father first lost his job when I was in 8th grade. At one point, my grandmother paid the tuition. My younger brother went to public school (we were in a W-school-equivalent district). There was no money for extras. I had to stop piano - no money for lessons. No vacations. I worked and bought my own clothes, paid for my own entertainment. I could have cared less about this private school, would have happily gone to public. But that was not something my parents would consider. When it came time for college, I was very sensitive to cost in my applications. For that particular application year, my father was unemployed. As it turned out, private college or public - no difference, same loans and work-study at both, just also got a grant at private college. I happily trotted off to the prestigious private college (and worked my work-study, and lived life on the cheap). One year later - private college provides ZERO grant. In the meantime my father was (temporarily) employed, his salary was too high, etc. But of course by then my parents were behind on their mortgage, and a million other essential expenses. Through a combination of help from my grandmother, AP credits (one less semester of college) and a year of college at State U, I managed to graduate from private college. With quite a bit of debt - not just "good" federal student loan debt, but about $10K on credit cards (which I had used to stuff like books. and groceries - I remember when safeway started accepting credit - it was a good day for me). Fast forward to my life - my kids do not go to private school, although we probably could scrape it together to pay for it "in the now." We live in a tiny, modest home - although we could afford much bigger/nicer. But we are saving for college. Not for private college - but we will have the $ in the bank to pay for flagship State U, for each child. We also have emergency savings in case one of us becomes unemployed. That is the best investment we can give them. The freedom to graduate from college debt-free and not to have to worry about supporting their parents in the future. All that said, I agree with PPs that on $60K with 6 kids, you were never going to save to pay for college anyway. Your children will need to borrow to go to college. Those are the facts. I actually think on that fact pattern, your kids will not need to choose a school by cost. In other words, these kids are going to need to borrow/work-study wherever they go. They might as well go to the "best" (including most prestigious/private) that they get into. Probably not going to make any difference loan-wise. And if they get into an Ivy that commits to no-debt, all the better. |
Anonymous
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Peculiar, self-indulgent, hedonistic, pretentious parents. "I feel so sad that I'm a freak of a mother and that I may have damaged my baby because of my superior views of child rearing! Boo Hoo!" Meet the Fockers goes Woodstock.
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Anonymous
Except she did not really have a choice. If you have 6 kids and has a HHI less than 50K. No matter what you do, you are not saving for colleges. So might as well spend it now. The poster's GF who had to 200K windfall had a choice. Not the writer for the NYT blog. |
Anonymous
This is true! So maybe GF should've written the article. 
Sidenote: I wonder why the posters who went crazy on her in the comment section overlooked that point? She really didn't have a choice. |
Anonymous
Ha! Thank you. That's what I thought but didn't have the words. Also thought they were living in the past-- a rosy glow version of grandparents life. "The past that never was" |
Anonymous
I don't get it. I didn't read hedonsism or superiority. (Lessons and summer camps are hedonistic?) I also didn't read guilt about damaged children. As a PP pointed out, it was a matter of surviving now vs. trying in vain to save for later. And with 6 kids there was little choice. |
Anonymous
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Sounds like the author (and PP's DF) did everything wrong.
My parents were working class and saved every dime to pay for my education. But they were great, intelligent people who provided a very enriching childhood on practically no money. I ended up getting a full academic scholarship to 5 of the universities I applied to (went to a public ivy and paid for rent/groceries by working a lot and tutoring) and also got a full merit scholarship plus stipend for grad school (private). I told my parents to keep their money for retirement. They deserved it for being able to raise me as well as they did on almost nothing. I don't know if it'll work for my DD and DS, but they are also bright and I am also going to save for their education while enriching their lives in (mostly) non-monetary ways. |
Anonymous
In what non-monetary ways will you enrich their lives? And can you not see a difference between your parents and a family of 8??! And I'd have a hard time arguing that what either family did was wrong given the outcomes. In DF's case the children have been enriched to the point of boatloads of merit aid. |