If you had an abortion you really didn't want to have

[Anonymous]

I knew a woman who had to have a late term abortion she didn't want. The school community made meals and brought her children to and from school.

We were talking about something and I told her I heard and was sorry about the terrible loss. It was so hard on her and the whole family. They were all excited about the baby.

Be grateful for your uncomplicated pregnancies, ladies. I'm so grateful I've never had to make such a choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish someone would have shown me the other alternatives. Told me I didn't have to do this and helped me find resources. I was 18, my parents were not supportive. My boyfriend (at the time) was not supportive. I had $75 to my name (boyfriend paid for the abortion) and had just started a new job at a grocery store bagging groceries. I happened to have a Saturday off (pretty rare in the grocery business for a new hire) and worked just a few hours Friday morning, so I was able to schedule the procedure for Friday afternoon...then it was back to work on Sunday.

You knew there were alternatives. What you wanted someone to tell you was it was ok to be a parent with no financial, emotional, or parenting resources and to raise your child in poverty. It's tough to find an adult who will tell you that.

Adoption is ALWAYS an option.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish someone would have shown me the other alternatives. Told me I didn't have to do this and helped me find resources. I was 18, my parents were not supportive. My boyfriend (at the time) was not supportive. I had $75 to my name (boyfriend paid for the abortion) and had just started a new job at a grocery store bagging groceries. I happened to have a Saturday off (pretty rare in the grocery business for a new hire) and worked just a few hours Friday morning, so I was able to schedule the procedure for Friday afternoon...then it was back to work on Sunday.

You knew there were alternatives. What you wanted someone to tell you was it was ok to be a parent with no financial, emotional, or parenting resources and to raise your child in poverty. It's tough to find an adult who will tell you that.

Adoption is ALWAYS an option.

What if you are worried that your child could be born with some moderate to severe problems? Maybe you've been drinking, smoking, not eating, even doing drugs during the pregnancy? What if you are worried that you can't take care of your pregnant body the way it should be taken care of (lack of money, addiction problems, eating disorder, etc)? What if you simply aren't ready to put your body through a birth? Maybe you have health issues that could impact the baby (HIV, hepatitis).

It's not black and white.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

First, I apologize to real DCUMers because I'm apparently entertaining a troll. Second, I ask not of this particular troll but of all abortion -related morons out there: Where were you for Relisha? What are you doing for the next Relisha?

Who is Relisha and what does she have to do with justifying killing babies? What are you doing for the next Relisha since you know so much about her? Or is "just kill 'em all" your motto.

I would be a troll if I was responding because I thought it was funny. This is not funny and it is nothing to troll about.

If you don't know who Relisha is you can get the fuck off this board, since if you don't you are clearly not a DC urban mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

First, I apologize to real DCUMers because I'm apparently entertaining a troll. Second, I ask not of this particular troll but of all abortion -related morons out there: Where were you for Relisha? What are you doing for the next Relisha?

Who is Relisha and what does she have to do with justifying killing babies? What are you doing for the next Relisha since you know so much about her? Or is "just kill 'em all" your motto.

I would be a troll if I was responding because I thought it was funny. This is not funny and it is nothing to troll about.

If you don't know who Relisha is you can get the fuck off this board, since if you don't you are clearly not a DC urban mom.

+1
And too stupid to use google. Just to double-check I just googled "Relisha," and she is the only one that comes up on the page.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Chalk me up as another who can't support baby killing.

I agree. I think a woman shouldn't be able to leave having an abortion without an IUD or Depo shot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today my friend who had an abortion says she wished her "support" person had made some effort to talk her out of it. There were other options.

Which clinics lay out as part of the array of options and any sixth grader knows.

no they don't

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Chalk me up as another who can't support baby killing.

I agree. I think a woman shouldn't be able to leave having an abortion without an IUD or Depo shot.

Lets tell that to the women who aborted because their baby had Edwards syndrome or anencephaly. Seriously, fuck you and your utter lack of compassion for women making hard decisions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today my friend who had an abortion says she wished her "support" person had made some effort to talk her out of it. There were other options.

Which clinics lay out as part of the array of options and any sixth grader knows.

no they don't

Glad you're so experienced in abortion clinics. Having actually HAD an abortion, I can tell you that information is available about a wide variety of choices in every abortion provider.

[Anonymous]

OP, if you are still reading, please know that many, many of us have had abortions and have gone on to have happy marriages and families. (If our parents only knew how many girls in DC area Catholic schools had abortions, they would keel over.) It is a terrible decision to have to make, but the vast majority of women have no regrets later on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Today my friend who had an abortion says she wished her "support" person had made some effort to talk her out of it. There were other options.

She and a lot of people. Her voice won't drown out the extreme voices on either side. These women suffer silently and when she talks about it, it will be taboo. Her pro life friends will drown her with crap about Jesus and her pro choice friends will trivialize her feelings. Those with good professional experience like some OBs can understand. The pain is immense and she will never stop thinking about her child, her little friend, who only she knew.
The extreme views make it hard for any logic to come into this. In the end there are women who are being hurt by a system that refuses to be intellectually honest. There IS post abortion stress, no different than PTSD. And for some women, that is not worth it, they would have rather struggled with the child than live through that. And these are NOT religious people, they are just humans with normal emotions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today my friend who had an abortion says she wished her "support" person had made some effort to talk her out of it. There were other options.

She and a lot of people. Her voice won't drown out the extreme voices on either side. These women suffer silently and when she talks about it, it will be taboo. Her pro life friends will drown her with crap about Jesus and her pro choice friends will trivialize her feelings. Those with good professional experience like some OBs can understand. The pain is immense and she will never stop thinking about her child, her little friend, who only she knew.
The extreme views make it hard for any logic to come into this. In the end there are women who are being hurt by a system that refuses to be intellectually honest. There IS post abortion stress, no different than PTSD. And for some women, that is not worth it, they would have rather struggled with the child than live through that. And these are NOT religious people, they are just humans with normal emotions.

Yeah, I don't buy this at all. Do you know any women who've had abortions? Other than those who come to your church or who you've met at pro-life events?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, if you are still reading, please know that many, many of us have had abortions and have gone on to have happy marriages and families. (If our parents only knew how many girls in DC area Catholic schools had abortions, they would keel over.) It is a terrible decision to have to make, but the vast majority of women have no regrets later on.

+1. Having an abortion allowed me to finish school, marry, have two beautiful children and a career. If I had been forced to give birth to the first pregnancy, none of that would have been possible, and I would have likely spent my life in poverty.

You sound like a great friend, and carry on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Chalk me up as another who can't support baby killing.

I agree. I think a woman shouldn't be able to leave having an abortion without an IUD or Depo shot.

Lets tell that to the women who aborted because their baby had Edwards syndrome or anencephaly. Seriously, fuck you and your utter lack of compassion for women making hard decisions.

Clearly geared toward not these cases.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today my friend who had an abortion says she wished her "support" person had made some effort to talk her out of it. There were other options.

She and a lot of people. Her voice won't drown out the extreme voices on either side. These women suffer silently and when she talks about it, it will be taboo. Her pro life friends will drown her with crap about Jesus and her pro choice friends will trivialize her feelings. Those with good professional experience like some OBs can understand. The pain is immense and she will never stop thinking about her child, her little friend, who only she knew.
The extreme views make it hard for any logic to come into this. In the end there are women who are being hurt by a system that refuses to be intellectually honest. There IS post abortion stress, no different than PTSD. And for some women, that is not worth it, they would have rather struggled with the child than live through that. And these are NOT religious people, they are just humans with normal emotions.

Yeah, I don't buy this at all. Do you know any women who've had abortions? Other than those who come to your church or who you've met at pro-life events?

This is funny. My resonse was neutral. I am an atheist and I can'tstand the religious right. I just know a ton of women who suffered in silence. Some have spoken to me because they know that I understand PTSD and they know that I am not religious. NEVER been to church, never been baptized, married another atheist.