Male Loneliness Epidemic

[Anonymous]

I really like the Men’s Shed initiative which has spread from my native Australia to other countries including the US. It addresses loneliness in mainly older males by providing a venue and community where men can teach each other skills, do classes, drop in for a cup of tea, etc. It’s great that it is not focused on drinking and sports.

If you believe their website, there are more Men’s Sheds than McDonald’s in Australia. One of my single male friends who retired there did mahjong classes, used their specialist woodworking tools to do projects, etc.

https://mensshed.org/
https://usmenssheds.org/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://www.instagram.com/p/DXVcRIWgnBX/

Also, the comments nailed it. Some of the comments:

"The "male loneliness epidemic" is men depriving themselves of joy to impress other men depriving themselves of joy and then blaming their lack of joy on women who weren't even invited in the first place."

"Anything but effort."

"Men used to not have this problem. Let’s think about what has changed. Maybe it’s the time spent gaming and isolating yourself."

"I heard men say “I don’t wanna approach her because I don’t want her to see me as a creep”… then don’t be creepy and leave if she asks you to "

"TO THE MEN COMPLAINING ABOUT BEING LUMPED TOGETHER INTO THE "ALL MEN" BUCKET --- GO HOLD THOSE MEN WHO GIVE YOUR GENDER A BAD REP ACCOUNTABLE! women aren't happy that by default we have to assume you're all shit, it's putting us on edge constantly, but we're not psychic, we can't tell whether you're a good one or not, so we have to assume the worst! so help us hold those who give your gender a bad rep responsible and we're ALL better off!"

"Interesting how a lot of young women are experiencing the same problems of loneliness and struggling to make friends, but no one's labeled it Human Loneliness Epidemic. Men are suffering so it has to be an epidemic for them. Also, women may struggle with this but at least we're out there trying to do something about it, as difficult as it may be."

It's not about you.

[Anonymous]

My spouse has a ton of friends - a lot of them go back many decades. However, he is an introvert and many of them don’t live close by, so while he doesn’t see them a lot, he has ongoing group chats and talks to some of them daily.

[Anonymous]

I don’t think the male loneliness epidemic is about married men approaching midlife. It’s about the young, single men without friends IRL.

For far too many years, the responsibility of community building fell to women. We need to be teaching boys the importance and the steps of doing this.

[Anonymous]

My next door neighbor “ John” 40 yo male, never married , no kids - works from home in dc close-in suburb.

This makes me sad for him:
When my college kid is home & having hs buddies over Johnis always over.

And the boys enjoy John, they welcome him. but as a 50 yo woman looking at John’s social life, lack of relationships I feel bad for him & worried about American men in general.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My next door neighbor “ John” 40 yo male, never married , no kids - works from home in dc close-in suburb.

This makes me sad for him:
When my college kid is home & having hs buddies over Johnis always over.

And the boys enjoy John, they welcome him. but as a 50 yo woman looking at John’s social life, lack of relationships I feel bad for him & worried about American men in general.

OP - I should add they hang out 4-7 nights a week here & John is there too. Not just once on a a while that he comes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think the male loneliness epidemic is about married men approaching midlife. It’s about the young, single men without friends IRL.

For far too many years, the responsibility of community building fell to women. We need to be teaching boys the importance and the steps of doing this.

Men had a tradition of lodges before the TV/Internet era.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband and son are on the spectrum, and this is why they don't have close friends, and what friends they have, they are content to see them rarely.

But neurotypical men? All my friends' husbands have lots of friends and see them pretty often, except the ones far away.

Draw the correct conclusion, OP.

Why did you marry someone on the spectrum?

I’m curious as to why any woman would choose to do this. Is he really wealthy? Or did you think your own chances of finding a quality husband were too low?

I just can’t fathom why any woman would do this, except for maybe they’re overweight or unattractive or had no better prospects.


How did this happen?

Wow. People on the spectrum are worthy of relationships and love. Although I wouldn't expect someone who refers to people as "quality husbands" to understand much about that.

~ DW of a neurodivergent DH

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband and son are on the spectrum, and this is why they don't have close friends, and what friends they have, they are content to see them rarely.

But neurotypical men? All my friends' husbands have lots of friends and see them pretty often, except the ones far away.

Draw the correct conclusion, OP.

Why did you marry someone on the spectrum?

I’m curious as to why any woman would choose to do this. Is he really wealthy? Or did you think your own chances of finding a quality husband were too low?

I just can’t fathom why any woman would do this, except for maybe they’re overweight or unattractive or had no better prospects.


How did this happen?

It sounds like YOU are on the spectrum.

[Anonymous]

The "Bowling Alone" author has made a film related to loneliness, lack of engagement, and future of US society.

"Join or Die'
https://joinordiefilm.com/