At what age you should downsize?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I want to upsize in early retirement- get a place on a ton of land, work and play on the land and have some fun. Then downsize as my health deteriorates.


I'm in my late 50s, DH is in his late 60s. We are actually up-sizing. We live in a 2400 sq ft house that neither of us loves. We've always wanted to live in an old house (like a Victorian), so we started looking for one. Our youngest child graduates from college this year, and we want more space, not less. Each of us wants our own office, we want a guest room, and a gym-type room. We are looking for a house where we can age in place, ie live on two floors now, but as we age, live on only the first floor. Some old Victorians have double parlors, so you can turn one of the parlors or the dining room into a master bedroom. As long as there's a laundry and full bath on the main floor, we can live on that floor. When the kids come to visit, they can stay on the second and third floors. If we can't find the house we want, we are going to buy some property and build one. We are both very focused on staying healthy, eating very clean, healthy food, exercising, keeping toxins out of our environment, etc. Luckily, we are in good shape. DH plans to retire at 80, and I plan to retire at 75. If we're healthy, that's the plan. We both enjoy working and don't want to quit. We have no big plans to travel, nor does either of us have a bucket list. We want to enjoy our kids and grandkids (when they arrive) and friends and keep working and living in the same house for as long as we can.
Anonymous
My marriage will not thrive if we have to share the same living room and bedroom 24/7. I need my own space, so I'm not in favor of downsizing until we go to a retirement home one day. Decluttering, yes. Doing that now.
Anonymous
My friend and her DH downsized at 58 and have some regrets about not having enough space now that they have grandkids. I already have a small house and I'd like to upsize a bit for this very reason.
Anonymous
I love having a four-bedroom house even though it's just DH and me. We each have an office and there's a dedicated guest room. When I look at condos, I can't imagine squeezing into such a small space after decades of living in a house. But we don't want to do lawn upkeep at some point. Such a dilemma.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I love having a four-bedroom house even though it's just DH and me. We each have an office and there's a dedicated guest room. When I look at condos, I can't imagine squeezing into such a small space after decades of living in a house. But we don't want to do lawn upkeep at some point. Such a dilemma.


Can you hire out the yard work?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I love having a four-bedroom house even though it's just DH and me. We each have an office and there's a dedicated guest room. When I look at condos, I can't imagine squeezing into such a small space after decades of living in a house. But we don't want to do lawn upkeep at some point. Such a dilemma.


Can you hire out the yard work?


We've started doing that already, but DH doesn't want another single-family home. If we move, it'll be a condo or townhouse, most likely.
Anonymous
After the kids have graduated from college and are working full time. For us that means early 60’s. We are exploring where we want to move to.

We started paring down when our youngest entered college. We have spent the last 6 months preparing the house to put on the market. We are to the point where if we find a place we both like we can pull the trigger and make an offer contingent on our home selling at any time.

Anonymous
When your kids are successfully left the nest.
Hopefully after they graduate college.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I want to upsize in early retirement- get a place on a ton of land, work and play on the land and have some fun. Then downsize as my health deteriorates.


I'm in my late 50s, DH is in his late 60s. We are actually up-sizing. We live in a 2400 sq ft house that neither of us loves. We've always wanted to live in an old house (like a Victorian), so we started looking for one. Our youngest child graduates from college this year, and we want more space, not less. Each of us wants our own office, we want a guest room, and a gym-type room. We are looking for a house where we can age in place, ie live on two floors now, but as we age, live on only the first floor. Some old Victorians have double parlors, so you can turn one of the parlors or the dining room into a master bedroom. As long as there's a laundry and full bath on the main floor, we can live on that floor. When the kids come to visit, they can stay on the second and third floors. If we can't find the house we want, we are going to buy some property and build one. We are both very focused on staying healthy, eating very clean, healthy food, exercising, keeping toxins out of our environment, etc. Luckily, we are in good shape. DH plans to retire at 80, and I plan to retire at 75. If we're healthy, that's the plan. We both enjoy working and don't want to quit. We have no big plans to travel, nor does either of us have a bucket list. We want to enjoy our kids and grandkids (when they arrive) and friends and keep working and living in the same house for as long as we can.


This sounds like one of the worst plans I can imagine. Hopefully you live somewhere kids want to visit other than to see you…if you live in SF, then of course have at it with your Victorian fascination.

Just do your kids a favor and dump your old Victorian home before it becomes their problem.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I want to upsize in early retirement- get a place on a ton of land, work and play on the land and have some fun. Then downsize as my health deteriorates.


Many people go into denial as they decline until something major happens or they feel fine up until the life altering diagnosis and they get rushed into surgery, start chemo and the last thing they can think about is moving and downsizing. you can downsize and go "play and have some fun" on lots of land for a vacation. If you plan to buy farm animals, please have a plan where someone can take them immediately if things go south. Often when one elderly parent falls apart, the other one does too if not physically, then emotionally or even cognitively. Have your fun but don't expect your kids to rescue you at the drop of a hat. My parents had your mentality and after enough rescues I had my own emergencies to deal with a teen's health issue, my husband and then myself. It truly did me in and in their minds it was "no trouble."
Anonymous
I have been thinking of downsizing but we have put a lot of work into the house (new siding, roof, kitchen, bathrooms) and most of it is on one level so may keep around until we are ready for condo or ccrc. There are steps up to the house and laundry is in the basement but otherwise all on one floor and we could probably renovate to have the laundry upstairs if needed . Our bigger issue is where we might want to live in retirement. we will keep the house here as a base for kids for some time after college, but I do think a lot about moving to california, where our siblings (and only close family) are.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:As soon as kids go to college we are leaving DC and buying acreage somewhere to enjoy for a couple decades. We'll be 47/48 so we should have 20 decent years. I want 1 level living, a separate walkout basement apartment or small secondary living set up like a carriage house in case a kid or parent needs to move in with us, and 5+ acres.

Our NoVA house is only 1500 sf so it's fine, but it's set up terribly with bedrooms upstairs and laundry in the basement and I don't want to deal with it after the kids are gone.


My parents did this in their mid 50s when I was about to finish college, except they bought a 3-bedroom (with a first story master bedroom) farmhouse complete with a barn on 15 acres. They downsized from our suburban 4 bedroom house.

They had fun with it, but it was a ton of work and $ to keep up (with a lot of outsourcing). Soon after, my dad had a heart attack, but thankfully survived and they continued on. They spent a lot of money on renovations over the years. They were further out from quality medical care and once they hit mid-60s and a few medical scares - dad fell outside and broke/shattered his arm from slipping on ice - they downsized to a one story with attached garage in the suburbs near medical care and good hospitals. Some other things to think about if you’re further out with land: slower internet / frequent outages, cell signal - it was weak so they required a land line, septic system only, lower water pressure, giant wolf spiders (yikes), lots of land to mow (on a riding mower or outsourcing). Finding reliable people to come out to make repairs (further out can cost more and they often had to wait longer until people could make the trip out), mail delivery at a local post office instead of mail box, people would drop off outdoor cats they no longer wanted and my parents would get them spayed/neutered and
let them remained outdoor cats feeding and watering them daily, while letting them live in the barn, lack of uber/lyft for when I was visiting. The good: gorgeous landscape (my dad became a pro designer after he retired), young grandkids who lived 20 mins away LOVED coming over, they built a chicken coop and had fresh eggs (tons of work) - chickens got slaughtered when a fox got in their pen one night, amazing fresh fruits and veggies, pumpkins patch for kids, lots of space with no neighbors, lots of funny and great memories, among others. That said, even if you’re not “farming” be prepared for all of the other potential issues, which my parents definitely had to get used to!
Anonymous
Whenever the person is ready. I did it at 59 when my spouse died. My mom waited until she was 81.
Anonymous
We are downsizing now in our 50s. I thought I kept up with donating/shredding and all that and this is taking hours and hours. We will do it again in our 60s. We are determined to break the cycle and not be selfish expecting our kids to do all the work. We went through it and we want to do everything possible to enjoy our adult children and the families they create. We are doing our part in the hopes our kids with stay close friends and we don't want to be a burden. Our next big move after this one will be in our 60s or early 70s will be to a CCRC.
Anonymous
So many people in my neighborhood are retired empty nesters in their 60s and 70s who haven't moved on from their four- and five-bedroom colonials. I believe one reason is there's a lack of appealing and affordable one-level-living options in the area.
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